492. Becoming a Dad (with Andy & Ben) Part 2

The second part of this conversation with Andy Johnson and Ben Butler, and we talk about the moment of childbirth and take a quiz about becoming a father. Vocabulary is explained in the second part of the episode. Vocabulary list available.

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Introduction Transcript

Welcome back to part 2 of this double episode called “Becoming a Dad with Andy and Ben” – I may need to rethink that title. It sounds a bit misleading. “Becoming a Dad with Andy & Ben” – It sounds like I’m becoming a Dad with Andy & Ben – as if somehow Andy and Ben are involved. I’m not sure about that idea. I mean, they definitely weren’t involved.

Nevertheless, here is Becoming a Dad with Andy and Ben part 2, in which I am talking to my friends Andy and Ben about their experiences of becoming a father for the first time. I’m trying to learn a few things about what it will be like when I become a Dad in a matter of weeks.

Andy & Ben are like seasoned professionals at this now as they both have two kids.

In part 1 you heard about things like conception, trimesters, epidurals and all sorts of other things.

We left it on a bit of a cliffhanger with me asking Andy & Ben about the moment their first children were born, so we get straight into it here talking about the big day, the moment when it’s time to get to the hospital and all hell breaks loose! Now, this is probably the most crucial moment of the whole process and can also be quite a dangerous day as well, so there is often drama and a lot of nerves. It’s a nerve-wracking experience, and we’ll be talking about it in some detail – so if childbirth is a topic that you are sensitive about, just have a think before embarking on this episode.

I think I’m prepared for the big day (mentally and also in terms of our home) but it’s going to be a big rush to deal with and no doubt quite emotional! Even going for scans is quite a big deal, so it’s a bit hard to imagine what the birth will be like.

Anyway, let’s carry on. See if you can identify the things Andy and Ben are saying and stick around because in the second part I’ll be going through lots of the vocab you’ll be hearing, turning this into a great learning opportunity for you.

—- Conversation Continues —–

So that was my conversation with Andy & Ben. Did you catch everything?

You know what’s happening now, right?

That’s right it’s vocab time.

Let me now go through some vocabulary for you.

Vocabulary List

  1. She told me that she thought her water had broken
  2. I was training someone to fill my role while I was taking paternity leave
  3. The contractions were pretty slow actually
  4. Braxton Hicks
  5. It took her ages to start contracting properly
  6. We went to the hospital after 36 hours of labour
  7. She was already 9cm dilated
  8. My wife was out of it
  9. They just whisked my wife away to the theatre.
  10. I’m not a man for a crisis. I wouldn’t know what to do. I’d be running around like a headless chicken.
  11. My wife developed gestational diabetes.
  12. Too much sugar going through the placenta can make the baby grow too quickly.
  13. We got a cab in and it was great (not a cabin).
  14. The umbilical cord had got wrapped around his neck
  15. They cut the umbilical cord and took him over to the resuscitation table
  16. First of all I saw this massive… junk. Because when babies are born their genitals are swollen. So, first thing I saw was it’s a boy.
  17. That was me finished, I just burst out crying.
  18. And then he weed all over the nurse.
  19. I held it together. I don’t know how I did because I’m quite squeamish.
  20. As soon as I got outside, that’s when I really broke down.
  21. If there are dramas, don’t worry, you’re in safe hands.
  22. You just have to go with the flow and it’s alright in the end.
  23. This is easy, I’ve nailed this parenting lark!
  24. Once they start to wake up, that’s when it kicks in, is it?
  25. If you can manage the people who want to see the baby, who hound you…
  26. I tell you what, I’ve got a little quiz here…
  27. She’s just gone through childbirth so she needs to be pampered
  28. What would the native Americans do? They’d probably use buffalo turds
  29. When the baby is born the mother and father are flooded with a hormone – the happiness hormone.
  30. Your wife is your number 1 person, but she is going to be relegated, and so are you.
  31. They start gurgling and making noises
  32. The youngest, he looks at me and his whole face lights up with a big smile.
  33. You get a good couple of nights’ sleep (in a hotel) and your body remembers and goes “Oh I want more of this” and you end up still being knackered!
  34. Once things have settled down we can have another chat and we can see you with the big bags under your eyes.

Thanks for listening! I look forward to reading your comments.

  • coki coki

    Hi Luke. Welcome to the new ‘dark’ world of daddy :) jajaja. I’m joking. Is the best that the human can do…be dad & mom. I listen your podcast since 3 months and I don’t miss any episode. My advisement for your wife: USE the Epidural!!! good luck!

  • euoamo

    Hi Luke,
    Thank you for these two episodes. There are lots of useful phrases as always.
    In Japan there is a saying “一姫二太郎”
    Have you heard this when you lived in Japan? It means “it’s good to have a daughter first and then a son. I don’t know it’s true or not but a girl is easy to bring up than a boy. What do you think about it?

  • Eri

    These 2 episodes are quite interesting for me.

    Not ony learning vocabularies but also knowing how to feel to be a dad.

    As you mentioned, painless delivery with epidural is not common in Japan and some serious troubles have been to court and became big news.

    Paternity leave is also not common in Japan and it is only for big conpanies. I know a only friend who took it. Is it common in other countries and how long wil father take it?
    I wish your wife spends lovely days before the baby comes and good luck!!

    • Cat

      Dear Eri,
      The same to you: have lovely days before the big day comes. Save your energy and look forward to the new page in your and your husbands lifes! ;)
      Many many congrats. Being a mum is such a wonderful thing. Enjoy! :))

  • Olga Shamanova

    Hi Luke! Thank you for this episode! I liked the quiz from Andy, but I don`t think that your answers reflect ability to be a Dad =) Of course you need to follow by some common rules concerning to take care of baby, but remember, she is YOUR kid and YOU have to find the special key for her.
    By the way, in my country (I`m from Russia) the midwifes are teaching young parents to put newborn in the cot on the side and, moreover, to change side every two hours. They say that we should not allow the baby is sleeping on the back because of newborn`s regurgitation.

  • Cat

    Ben to Luke (appearing from the snow dust):
    – Luke, stand up! Go to Andy. He will advice you in father arts. Don’t think! Do! Use your feelings. The force is strong in your family.
    – Ben! Ben! (stands up)

  • Helena

    Guys, I think I should make an important point here regarding the first part of the conversation (in the previous episode): you DO NOT want your wives/partners to watch Stars Wars now, trust me. When the relationship has reached a stable point in which you assume that your significant other doesn’t care about Star Wars because she or he has never seen it, it’s better to leave it that way. The last thing you want is for them to watch the movies and find out that they actually don’t like them, because once they say the magic words “I don’t know what you like so much about this sh*t” there’s no turning back, you’ll have to re evaluate the whole relationship. Trust me, ignorance is bliss.

    • Very interesting point Helena. I think I might keep the Star Wars to myself then. It’s worked fine so far, so perhaps I shouldn’t upset the delicate balance that exists in my relationship and not taint my enjoyment of Star Wars with my wife’s negative comments!