Category Archives: Travel

192. Culture Shock: Life in London (Pt.1)

This episode is all about common complaints made by foreign students living in London. It’s common to experience some level of culture shock when dealing with the realities of living in the capital city as a foreign visitor. In this episode I’ll try and clarify some of the confusions and frustrations relating to every day life in London. Click here to download this episode. Click here for part 2 of this episode.

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I lived in London for many years and while working as an English teacher there I heard a lot of complaints from foreign students. I also heard plenty of nice comments of course. But in this episode I’d like to focus on the complaints in order to try and explain or demystify them. Fair enough – some of the complaints are valid, but often they are the result of those students/visitors experiencing culture shock related to living in an environment that was not normal for them, or for which the cause was not obvious. It’s important to find reasons for cultural phenomena that you don’t understand because it prevents you from coming to false conclusions about that place. I don’t want people just assuming that the English people are just strange. I mean, we are a bit strange of course, just like anyone, but a lot of the things we do are quite normal when you see it from our point of view. So, what are those common complaints? And what are the reasons for these strange and annoying aspects to English life? Perhaps the Londoners have got it wrong and they do things in the wrong way, or perhaps the foreign visitors just don’t see the whole picture. Listen to find out more.

What’s in this Episode?
*There is so much to say on this subject that I expect it will be divided into two episodes!*
1. Some short interviews with my colleagues in London, in which we discuss these common complaints.
I wanted to find out if my colleagues could explain some of the weird or annoying things about life in London. You can hear our responses in this episode. Some expressions and phrases from that recording are written on this webpage (below).
2. My responses to the complaints, and some explanations.
I’ll try and explain the reasons for these particular aspects of London life as well as I can, and I’ll decide if the complaint is fair or not.

It’s not all Negative
The cup is usually half-full! Of course, foreign students in London have plenty of great things to say about the place. Certainly, there are more positive things than negative, but I find that when students have lived in London for a little while, and they start to come face to face with the realities of living here, they start to develop little gripes (complaints) about the place, which can confuse and frustrate them. Let me try and clarify!

The Complaints about Life in London (commonly said by students of English)
Here’s a list of some of the typical complaints made by foreign students studying in London, and some notes relating to my responses that you can hear in this audio episode. You might find some of the complaints bizarre – that’s normal. I found some of them really bizarre when I first heard them, but you have to remember that the people who said these things came from countries in which the situation is quite different. They’re all completely true, and very common comments. After each complaint I will judge of the complaint is “reasonable” or “not reasonable”, and then I will “reject” or “accept” the complaint. If you don’t agree with my decisions, leave a comment explaining why!

1. “Why do you have a separate hot tap and a separate cold tap? I’m always scaulding my hands.”
The old 2-taps issue! It’s due to the development of plumbing, lack of water pressure, and separate water supplies.
https://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20090125000341AAR51ic
Interview with Karen Robertson. Last year Karen contacted me after reading a blog post I wrote on “Two Taps in the Bathroom” on the London School of English Blog. She lives in London, but is originally from South Africa. She was studying a MA in digital journalism at London Goldsmith University, and was doing a video project on foreign students’ reactions to London’s plumbing system, specifically the two taps issue. She wanted to interview me for the project. I recorded the interview and I’ve been waiting for an opportunity to let you listen to the conversation. Karen has researched the issue a lot and is able to give some pretty good reasons for the two taps in the bathroom mystery! (Karen gave me full permission to include this interview on the podcast).

2. “Why don’t you have electrical sockets in the bathroom? How am I supposed to dry my hair after I’ve had a shower and look in the mirror at the same time?”
This is because we consider it to be dangerous and there is legislation to protect people from being electrocuted.
http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/electrical-sockets-in-bathrooms-why-not

3. “The food is so plain and unhealthy”
Why is English food so bad? Most of the famous stuff is based on ‘working class recipes’ – the recipes of poor people who had limited access to ingredients and who had to make food that would keep or was portable. This food is often specific to local regions, and naturally people are proud of their local culture and so they celebrate the food, and it becomes part of our tradition. The rich people had food too, but it’s pretty exclusive stuff and very expensive. A lot of our good food is seasonal. A lot is cooked privately, at home. Also, we have been very international for many years. English food is Indian, Chinese, French etc. We eat YOUR food, thanks very much. I think it was John Cleese who said that English food is bad because we were too busy taking over the world to focus on cooking.
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110123154803AAwbAhZ

4. “The weather is miserable. It’s always raining”
Why is British weather so bad? It’s not that bad, it’s just changeable. Geography – we’re far north of the hemisphere and that’s just what happens up there! Deal with it. Also, it doesn’t get foggy in London like the stereotype. That’s an old myth. We had the industrial revolution which brought lots of smoke which combined with fog from the river. The result was old victorian smog made famous by Charles Dickens, Sherlock Holmes stories and others. The weather’s not that bad really, just a bit grey and chilly. The rain means the country is very green. The weather in Paris is pretty much the same.
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110613075947AABr8zK

5. “Why on earth do you drive on the left? It’s like you have to do everything differently here”
Why do the brits drive on the left? We’re not that stupid actually. We’ve been doing it for centuries, ever since it was normal to ride on the left as a way of staying safe (keep your sword in your right hand to defend yourself on horseback, etc). It should make sense, right? Remember, left is right, and right is just wrong! Also, it’s not just us. Plenty of others do it too including India, Japan, Australia and large parts of Africa. Sure, most of the world drives on the right, but it would be pretty hard for us to switch. Actually, our government is considering introducing a new law so that we will all drive on the right, but they’re going to phase it in over a 5 year period. First it’ll just apply to busses, and then cars, and finally motorbikes. Those last two sentences were a joke. Well done if you noticed :P
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/634/why-do-the-british-drive-on-the-left

6. “The trains are always late, and when they arrive they are full and I can’t get on!”
This is the result of a combo of one bad decision by the government, privatisation and a powerful union for the tube.
http://www.gizmodo.co.uk/2012/12/what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-british-trains/

7. “Why are there so many foreigners here? I haven’t met a ‘real’ English person yet”
Why are there so many foreginers here? Oh the irony. You won’t make many British friends with that attitude, except for UKIP or BNP members but they might not want to be friends with you in return. Generally, we’re a proudly multicultural place. Also, London is much more multicultural than other parts of the UK, so it’s not an accurate representation of the country as a whole. Take a good look around before making a sweeping judgement! Also, this is partly due to Britain’s past, particularly London. At one time, the British empire spanned the globe. We’ve had interests and dealings with many foreign countries for many years. We’re tied to plenty of foreign countries in complex ways. This is reflected in the fact that we have a multicultural population. Many people have come from our former colonies. Some were invited after the war. Also, lots of people just want to come to The UK because there are plenty of opportunities here, and why should they be stopped? It’s quite hypocritical to complain about the number of foreigners in London when you’re a foreigner (even if you’re just visiting for a while). London has an appeal for many people and for many different reasons. It always strikes me as ironic when a foreign visitor turns their nose up at London saying, “there are too many foreigners here”. What did they expect? Diversity is an integral part of London’s history and identity. Do they really expect some kind of Hollywood stereotype of London in which business men with top hats wander around empty streets like it’s the 1950s, saying “Good morning” with received pronunciation accents? Wake up and smell the coffee. Welcome to the real world in the 21st century. Multiculturalism may not be normal where you’re from but London is a proudly diverse place. Regarding immigration, some people in Britain believe it has gone too far, and maybe they have a case and the local culture is somehow being swamped, or maybe they’re just using immigration as a scapegoat for other problems. Whatever the case, personally I find it very disappointing to hear students complaining about London’s diversity. The bit about “I haven’t met a real English person yet?” – well, what is a real English person I ask you? Also, if you walk around with that kind of attitude, you’re unlikely to make good friends with many Londoners, except perhaps UKIP supporters.)

Vocabulary Extracts from the Conversation with my Colleages
Look at the following language from the conversations. These are vocabulary extracts from the conversation with my colleagues in London.
Look at the phrases:
Which topics were they about?
Can you remember what each person said about these things?

Listen again to the conversation and try to notice the phrases as they are used. In the podcast I’ll explain these phrases to you a little bit.

1.
Time and time again
Maybe it’s because it’s a much drier climate
Damp
A lot of English people are lazy when it comes to …-ing
We don’t have any call for other languages
Apart from English, learning languages isn’t fun

2.
Let’s see
The server
Stuff like that
I tend to agree
I can understand that
Get run over
We’ve got that weird mentality
We’re stupid aren’t we

3.
Come up with (come up with a list of things)
What do you reckon? I mean, like, why?
In the olden days
Environmentally friendly
Have something on tap
Plumbing
To have running water
To count yourself lucky

4.
I must dash
I’m sorry Luke, really, I have to dash

5.
They’re always griping and moaning
To be honest, they do like England a lot otherwise they wouldn’t come here
Get irritated
Incensed
Now tell me if this is weird, or not, right?
Washing up liquid
That could’ve been my house. That could’ve been me.
How else would you do it?
Sorry, I didn’t catch that
You have to soap them all individually, then rinse them
It’s got soap left on! It’s got the residue!
Can I just clarify what we’re talking about?
Put them under running water
Run them under the tap

CLICK HERE FOR PART 2 OF THIS EPISODE.

186. Understanding Culture Shock – with Lindsay & Gabby

This episode is all about culture shock and culture shock experiences and I’m glad to be joined by Lindsay & Gabby from the All Ears English podcast. Right-click here to download the episode.

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Lindsay & Gabby from All Ears EnglishLindsay McMahon and Gabby Wallace are well-qualified and well-experienced teachers of English from Boston, USA. They’re also the girls from the All Ears English Podcast. Last month I was a guest on their podcast and we talked about being funny and telling jokes in English. So, I returned the favour a few days ago and invited them onto LEP. Lindsay & Gabby have plenty of experience of not only meeting & teaching foreign visitors to the USA but also of travelling abroad and living in foreign countries. In this episode I talk to the girls about our experiences related to culture shock. Listen to the episode to find out more!

At the end of this episode, Lindsay & Gabby mentioned an eBook which they’ve written and is available for you to download. It’s full of useful advice on how to integrate into a new English-speaking culture. Click this link for more information, and to download the eBook: http://allearsenglish.com/luke

In this episode
We talk about:
Lindsay & Gabby’s teaching experiences.
Our travelling experiences, and instances of ‘culture shock’ that we have experienced in different countries.
Examples of culture shock experienced by visitors to the USA & UK.
Some reflections and conclusions on how to understand and deal with culture shock when it happens to you.

Thanks for listening, and look out for some more episodes about culture shock coming soon to LEP.

185. The Trip to New York

As promised, here is a description of my holiday in The Big Apple! In this episode I tell you what I did, what I saw and what it was like for me. You can read some vocabulary in the notes (not necessarily full sentences) that I’ve added below. There’s a slideshow of photos at the bottom if you fancy looking at that.

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Ambient music in the background – Bloom app by Brian Eno
This is an experiment to see how it sounds and how it affects the episode. I put music on in the background from time to time just to give episodes another element. This might make you fall asleep! I hope not. Well, if you do fall asleep we can blame the music and not me! The music is made using an app developed by Brian Eno. It’s a really clever app that allows you to compose ambient music that slowly loops and evolves over time.

Holiday Stories
People’s holiday stories can be boring, especially if they go to the beach.
People sometimes bore you with holiday photos, or even worse a long video of their holiday.

I certainly hope that this episode holds your attention. It should, because NYC is a very vibrant and interesting place and there are lots of things to say about it. You’ll also hear me using all kinds of phrases and vocabulary during the episode – the sort of language that is used to describe a holiday or a trip, or language for describing places and experiences, although I have not formally planned to teach you any specific items of vocabulary, we’ll just see what comes up.

So, let’s start.
I went in April, and that’s about 6 weeks ago. It’s still pretty fresh in my memory.

Times Square

Times Square

Context: I’ve lived in a few cities. London, Yokohama/Tokyo, Paris, Liverpool. I’ve also visited quite a few other cities, like Berlin, Barcelona, Milan, Rome, Oslo, Ho Chi Min City and others. Each city has its own unique atmosphere, story and appeal. New York though seems to be like the king of cities. I’ve never been to Moscow, Sao Paolo, Madrid, Prague, Seoul (except the airport) or many many other places. One day I would love to go. New York sticks in my imagination as the king of cities though. Perhaps it just has the best marketing – with all the movies and so on. But overall, New York seems to be the best example of a modern metropolis – a super-city.

Also, there are different levels of experience you can have when you visit a place. If you’ve lived there all your life, you’ll know one version of it. If you are a permanent resident, but you’ve lived in other places, you’ll have a different perspective, and if you’re just visiting as a tourist you’ll have another vision. As a tourist I realise I’m just scraping the surface really. The reality of living there must be quite different. I expect it can be a tough place to live just like anywhere else. NYC is know for being quite a stressful place for its residents, with the stereotype of the impatient New Yorkers who rush around, shouting “I’m walking here!” or desperately trying to get a cab, or arguing with someone in the street. Also, New York must hold lots of secrets for the people who know it well. The best places to go, the best food joints, the shortcuts though the streets, and the little tricks that you pick up regarding how to get by in the city. For example, in London you learn fairly quickly that you’re expected to do things in a certain way. Queueing etiquette, how to book a table, areas in town that you should avoid at certain times. So, as a tourist I was just scratching the surface. But NYC has a lot to offer to everyone – either permanent residents or temporary visitors. It’s a vast, sprawling place which has many faces. It’s pretty clear by now that I loved it and I think it’s incredible.

How does New York compare to the USA as a whole.

Why New York? Why not one of the other wonderful places in the world?

The flights
The in-flight entertainment
What it’s like being on a plane for about 7 hours. What are the difficulties and what are the joys?
I pissed off a stewardess and she ignored me forever after that.
They’re not so much there to serve you, but to dictate to you what you must do. She felt like Nurse Ratchet.
“I need you to turn that off for me please”
In-flight entertainment – Walther Mitty, All Is Lost – made me cry. Why do we get more emotional when we’re in the air?
Best and worst places to sit?
Fears about landings and take-offs?
Jerry Seinfeld – Airports & Flying (Seinfeld is the king of observational comedy and this is a classic routine about airports & flying.)

Arriving in America
Views of cars from the air. Big American cars.
Immigration – long queue, quite strict staff (I need you to turn off that cell phone! – Sir! Put the cell phone away! I’m turning it off. You don’t need to turn it off, just put it in your paaackit. etc)
Made jokes with the immigration officer guy. “Is he with you?” “No” Do you have children sir. “Not as far as I know” “Now would be a weird time to find out”…
Arriving in the airport – the first thing that hit us – the smell of french fries, and ketchup. That was the first smell. We took the train – quite loud and aggressive announcements to put bags up, but we couldn’t.
People were immediately friendly and helpful.
We got off at the wrong stop and ended up in New Jersey.
Arrived in Penn station finally – in the middle of Manhattan. Classic New York. Big buildings, yellow cabs, Madison Square Garden. Lots of people.
Everything is BIG!
Buildings, cars and PEOPLE.
Some people seem to be kind of square in shape.
Some classic NYC accents – train staff, police officers, a girl who helped us buy train tickets.
Cab ride to our neighbourhood. Looking out the window at the skyscrapers.
TV in the back of the cab.
Dropped off in our neighbourhood – lower East side. Clinton Street.
Quite downmarket & a bit rough, but very cool and hip. It felt safe, and very trendy. Organic cafes serving bagels and good coffee.
It felt like 100 movies and TV shows.
We were pretty knackered when we arrived.
We unpacked and then discovered the area a bit.

Katz Deli
The first thing we did was go to a place called Katz Delicatessen, which is a famous place for several reasons. 1. It has featured in a few films, notably “When Harry Met Sally”. 2. The food is amazing, particularly the pastrami sandwich. Massive amounts, really delicious. Just what the doctor ordered.
The place was amazing. Super friendly service. Full of locals.

Brooklyn
Sesame Street vibe.
Flea market.
Buildings.
Brownstones. Stoops.
Cops taping off an area with yellow police lines. NYPD Blue?
Ate lunch on steps listening to soulful house music blaring out of a speaker in the market, while a bearded hipster mended fixie bikes and mixed-race families let their kids run around and dance to the music. It was cool and hipsterish, but really it was a good atmosphere with a community spirit.
It reminded me of London – but a massive London on steroids.
Some areas were similar. Brooklyn felt a bit like South London, or the trendy parts of East London. Soho felt exactly like Soho, but massive. Times Square was like Leicester Square/Piccadilly Circus, but much bigger. Parts of Broadway felt like Oxford Street, but, yes, much bigger.
Everything is bigger – have I already said that?
Food portions & drinks – which is convenient because you can always order the small size.
Drink bottles are about 25% bigger than back home.
We walked back from Brooklyn to Manhattan via Williamsburg, which is a super-cool area full of very trendy people and hipster shops and cafes etc. It was very sunny and hot. On the way back we stopped near the river to rest. There was a large open area with a sports field, grass, and bars with big barbecues outside. Lots of people were drinking and eating in the sun, and there was an amazing view of the Manhattan skyline across the river in front of us.
We kept walking and came across a latin bar that was playing loud Salsa music, and loads of people were drinking and dancing outside the bar. This was just on a street corner near the Williamsburg bridge. It was about 6pm. I realised how multicultural the place is. There’s a large latin community and it’s reflected int he music. In fact, New York is famous for its diverse music. There’s the afro-American thing, the latin thing, disco and hip hop, a Caribbean influence, a jazz tradition, funk & soul music and also a folk and rock music tradition. It all combines to create a pretty brilliant melting pot. One of the cool things was to listen to music coming out of people’s cars. All of it sounded good.
The street where we stayed – cars blaring out music.
Took a taxi over Williamsburg Bridge.

Skyscraper district
The cool things about skyscrapers or big buildings that are on the skyline (and Mt Fuji in Japan) is that you see them from lots of different angles in the city. You can be walking around any part of New York and you’ll catch the Empire Stage Building or the Chrysler Building from a new angle and it immediately gives that area a kind of distinction. It happens in London now too. You can see The Shard from the north, south, east and west.
We took the subway to the central part of town and just walked around with our jaws on the floor. Amazing buildings towering above us.
I expected to see Spiderman flying between the buildings or something. We made our way to the Rockefeller Plaza and took a lift way up to the top. The Top of the Rock as it’s called. There’s an amazing view from up there. You can see the entire city and all the skyscrapers. Don’t go up the Empire State because you can’t see The Empire State Building, which is one of the coolest buildings in the city.

Shopping
I bought some shoes.
“Sneakers” as they call them in the states. In NY everyone wears sneakers.
I don’t know why they call them that.
I don’t think anyone’s using them for sneaking. (Walking quietly, like a robber)
It’s not like everyone in New York is going “Shhh! You’ve got to walk quietly! This is New York! don’t make too much noise!”
In the UK we call them “trainers”. I don’t know what I’m training for. Maybe to get some better shoes.
“Sports shoes” although I’m pretty sure I won’t be doing any sport. Probably the opposite of sport – just standing around & drinking.
Customer service culture.
Everything is massive.
Big salads.
You can just buy a small anything. Small drink, small coffee, small salad.

Metropolitan Opera House
Madame Butterfly. Amazing visuals. Beautiful opera house – art deco design. Modern, but classic. Lovely open space and some chic New Yorkers in the audience. The stage is big and it was well used in the production. It was directed by Anthony Minghella – a British director who directed The English Patient, Cold Mountain etc. His films seem to tell similar stories – lovers who are separated by large distances and who live with the impossible hope of reuniting with their lovers. Madame Butterfly tells a story like this. To be honest, I wasn’t impressed by the story, and the script was pretty awful in my opinion. Maybe it’s because it’s a translation from Italian, and because it’s opera. It’s a different medium, not like cinema. Perhaps it’s not about the script, but about the visuals, and the singing. It’s probably more impressive in Italian. Anyway, I found the script and story to be pretty cheesy, and pretty stupid in fact. I don’t mean to be a philistine or anything, but let’s have a quick look at the story. It’s mainly the characters who I don’t like, I think. I fail to see the romance in it, and instead I just see people being really irresponsible. Story…

Weather
Sunny, then snowing and freezing! (It seems that the weather is pretty variable everywhere these days)
Freezing our asses off, and hiding in a meatball bar – drinking beer and eating spaghetti & meatballs while a small storm raged outside. Bliss!

Madison Square Garden & The Basketball Game
The Chicago Bulls vs The New York Knicks.
Amazing American Entertainment. The good and the bad. The food, the constant entertainment. Is it just an excuse to eat hot dogs?

Central Park
It’s like Hyde Park really, but bigger. The combination of the skyline and the greenery is very appealing. It makes you think of all kinds of Hollywood films. It also makes me think of John Lennon and Yoko Ono walking around in the late 1970s. We saw the disco dancers and roller skaters, and the other performers. It’s very crowded and full of tourists.

Other Highlights
The Comedy Cellar + Seeing Louis CK!

The Highline
Wall Street
Wholefoods Supermarkets
Getting fit from walking
Old buildings – it must get very cold
Classy restaurant in Soho

The McKittrick Hotel & “Sleep No More”
It was a surprise.
This turned out to be one of the strangest and mysterious experiences I’ve had for a long time.
The McKittrick Hotel is a 6 or 7 storey building which has been converted into a bar on one floor, and the rest of the floors have been taken over by a theatre company from London called “PunchDrunk”. They’ve converted all these rooms on all these floors (about 100 rooms) into an elaborate and interactive theatre space. Every evening a performance takes place within this space, and you as the audience can just walk around, exploring the space, investigating rooms, and there is a whole performance also going on around you. Sometimes you see performers, sometimes you follow them around from room to room observing the action from inside the space. The closest thing I could compare it to, was a computer game such as Resident Evil 2, or other suspenseful horror mystery games.
Go through the experience from the beginning – that may be the best way to explain it.
Queue up – normal restaurant or night club in New York.
When you enter – you leave your coats, and a silent woman gives you a playing card. I got number 13, and my girlfriend got a different card. Then we walked into a corridor and it was really dark. We laughed a bit at this because the illusion was beginning. We walked up stairs and into a bar, but it was like a scene from Twin Peaks. There was a girl singing a jazz tune, and people in 1920s costumes standing at the bar. The place was dark and smokey and it felt like Twin Peaks or some American noir thriller. I expected to see Jessica Rabbit at any moment. We got some drinks and waited. Every now and then a man in a tuxedo with a posh British accent would call out numbers, and groups of people would disappear out of the room…
Click here to visit the website for Sleep No More at The McKittrick Hotel.

New York Slideshow

183. Luke’s D-Day Diary (Part 1)

Join me on a trip to Normandy for the commemoration of the World War 2 D-Day landings. Podcasting on my feet, some unexpected things happened during this trip.

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Introduction
Friday 6 June this year was the 70th anniversary of the DDay landings in Normandy. My Grandad Dennis was one of the soldiers who landed on the beach that day. Along with thousands of other men he risked his life to fight the Nazis in the 2nd World War. Many of his fellow soldiers did not survive. Last Friday I went to Caen in Northern France to take part in the D-Day commemorations and to see my comedy hero Eddie Izzard performing stand-up in 3 languages. I recorded a podcast during my trip, and some unexpected things happened! Listen to the episode to join me on my adventure.
6 June 1944 – D-Day
D-Day was a very important moment in World War 2. This was when the Allies fought back against the Nazis on the Western European front. It was a key victory for the Allies, but it was also very costly, particularly for the Americans, who lost thousands of men on June 6 alone. For more information about why D-Day was so important, click here to visit the website of the Imperial War Museum in London.

Ultimately, D-Day was a success, but it came with great destruction and loss of human life. The success was due in part to the very careful planning of the Allied forces before the day, but also to the extremely tough fighting in which the Nazis were engaged in the east with the Soviets.

Why was it called D-Day? Click here to find an answer to this question on the BBC Newsround website.

My D-Day Diary
In this episode you’ll join me on my journey to Caen, a town in Normandy that was a very important location during the Normandy campaign in WW2. Caen is where most of the commemorations were taking place (or so I thought). On Friday the town was visited by lots of people including heads of state such as The Queen, Barack Obama, Francoise Hollande, Vladimir Putin and Angela Merkel. They were all very excited to learn that Luke from Luke’s English Podcast was also going to be in town ;)

I was podcasting regularly during the trip. First you hear me on the train, then walking through the streets of Caen on the way to my rented apartment room, then sitting on the steps of a church with my friend Sebastian Marx (from episode 130), then in a car with Yacine, on the street again, and finally in the train on the way home the next day. In the episode I talk about D-Day, my Grandfather’s involvement in D-Day 70 years ago, my experience of seeing Eddie Izzard’s comedy show, the dumbfounding excitement of having dinner with Eddie Izzard. All in all it was quite an emotional experience all round. I hope you enjoy the episode…

My Grandad, Dennis Hallam

Dennis is 94 this year. 70 years ago he was just 24 years old but he was an officer in the army, in charge of 35 young soldiers. It was his responsibility to lead these men off the boat, up the beach and ultimately all the way through France and deep into enemy territory. It was very brave of him, and he fought for my freedom. Without Grandad, I wouldn’t be here today and there would be no Luke’s English Podcast. Thanks Dennis.

Recently my Dad (Dennis’s son-in-law) wrote to Dennis to thank him for what he did on D-Day. Here is a copy of Dennis’s reply, typed onto a computer by my Mum (Dennis’s daughter). Some words are defined below.

Dear Rick,
Thank you for your “Thankyou” card which made me feel both proud and embarrassed – I was only one of thousands.

It was pretty hairy, and for me and many others it started long before we reached the beach. The Channel crossing was vile – I was dreadfully sick. At some point during the night it was my turn to be Duty Army Officer on the bridge and I had to climb up there being sick and miserable. So it was almost a great relief to get onto the beach, even though wet through, having had to wade ashore, and even though there were assorted bits of metal flying around. What amazes and horrifies me is to think that I was just 24 and in charge of and responsible for a platoon of 35 soldiers. If there were privileges attached to commissioned ranks – and there were, of course, I think we deserved them – a lot was asked of us.

However, it was a war that had to be fought, I think, and one simply called on one’s training and did what seemed right at any situation.

I hope the celebrations will go well and it is good to know that what we did is remembered and honoured.

Thank you again – it was very kind of you.

Yours, Dennis.

Thank you too Grandad.

Eddie Izzard
He’s a stand-up comedian from the UK. I’m a huge fan. I won’t write more about him here because I’m planning to do an episode about him soon, in which I’ll play you some of his stand-up comedy. On 6 June he put on a special show, doing 3 performances – one in German, one in English and one in French. That’s really impressive, especially considering he is learning both German and French as second (or third?) languages. I was pretty awestruck to actually meet Eddie on Friday and then sit down to dinner in his company. I still can’t believe it happened because he’s sort of a hero of mine. Listen to the podcast to hear my reactions. I was quite excited.

Here’s some video of Eddie talking about how Anglo-Saxon English evolved, including his version of how English became a non-gendered language, distinct from the gendered French which existed in England at around the same time.

Here is a video showing footage of the D-Day operation. To be honest, the video doesn’t really show us how big the operation was. It was the biggest naval armada the world had ever seen, and has ever seen since. It must have been an overwhelming sight to behold.

War Is Hell

“Some of you young men think that war is all glamour and glory,
but let me tell you, boys, it is all hell!”
-General William T. Sherman

182. Learning English with Yacine Belhousse

This episode is all about the relationship between language, successful communication, stand-up comedy and learning English! It features an interview with the one-and-only Yacine Belhousse, who is a professional stand-up comedian in his native language and now in English too. A year and a half ago, Yacine hardly spoke any English. Now he regularly performs in English and this year he is doing a 1 hour stand-up comedy show at the Edinburgh fringe festival. How does he do it? How does he deal with the challenges of learning English while also making people laugh in English too? Listen and find out!

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I’m really pleased to present every episode of Luke’s English Podcast, but this one makes me extra pleased. Why? I just think that we come to some particularly useful conclusions during this conversation, especially related to the attitude that you need to learn English effectively. I’m also pleased to present Yacine because he’s got a great attitude towards learning English and because I think he’s really funny.

Conclusions about Learning Language
In summary here are some of the key points about learning English & communication from our conversation:
– To communicate well, you must take responsibility for communicative exchanges.
– Remember when you’re talking to native speakers, you’re just talking to another human. They have no reason to judge you if you’re just trying to communicate to achieve something. In fact, native speakers have the same responsibility for successful communication as you. So don’t feel that you’re totally responsible for any communication breakdown.
– Be confident and don’t worry about making mistakes. If you do make mistakes, you can learn from them and that’s how you improve. If you’re concerned that you can’t be confident – don’t worry. Confidence is something which just happens when you try to do something. If you focus on achieving successful communication, and don’t get upset by failure – confidence will just come naturally. So, don’t worry about confidence. Just focus on trying to achieve things.
– Have an organised approach to learning – mentally store words and phrases you like in the “good things bucket”. Reject bits of communication that didn’t work in the “bad things bucket”. Perhaps revisit the “bad things bucket” to learn from the errors, but enjoy the contents of your “good things bucket” too!
– Repeat words and phrases that you’ve learned. Repeat them lots of times in order to remember them.
– Learn by doing things. Learn to speak by speaking, failing, succeeding and moving on. You have to be active. Use your English. If you don’t use it, you lose it. You’ve got to be in it to win it!
– Be positive!

Listen to the conversation to find out more.

Links
Would you like to play Yacine’s computer game? Click here to visit the game on his website.

Will you be in Edinburgh during the Fringe? You should check out Yacine’s show. Click here for information on Yacine’s Edinburgh show.

Transcript to #182. Learning English with Yacine Belhousse
The introduction to this episode is transcribed below. If you would like to write some more minutes of transcript, click here to visit the google document for this episode.

Introduction
Here is my introduction to this episode of the podcast.

“Normally I have native speakers on this podcast; British people, Americans, Australians and stuff like that. And yet, most of the people who listen to this are non-natives learning the language. I rarely have learners of English giving their voice, which is a pity because everyone has a story to tell and interesting things to share. …

So, in today’s episode I am speaking to a friend of mine called Yacine. He’s not a native speaker. In fact, until quite recently he didn’t speak English at all. By his own admission, his English is not perfect. Sometimes he can’t find the right words, he has some trouble choosing the correct verb forms or pronouncing words naturally. These are all the normal problems faced by people learning English. However, I believe Yacine is quite special and that’s why I’ve brought him onto the podcast, despite not being a native or near-native speaker of English.

But why Luke? Why are you featuring a learner of English in one of your interviews? Well, there are lots of reasons:
– I think Yacine has a really good attitude towards learning, and I want to explore that so we can pick up some good things about language learning.
– Yacine is a professional stand-up comedian in his native language but he is also now performing shows in English. In fact, this year he is doing a regular one hour show at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, which is perhaps the biggest comedy festival in the world, and he regularly performs comedy with the great & legendary Eddie Izzard, who is considered by many to be one of the greatest stand-ups of his generation. Eddie Izzard is not just an inspiration to stand up comedians, he is also an inspiration to language learners all over the world, and we’ll find out more about that later. Yacine is very influenced by Eddie Izzard, and he often supports Eddie when he does shows in France.

Learning a language is a challenging thing for anyone. You know when you speak you feel shy and embarrassed sometimes because you don’t want to be judged (just like me when I go to the boulangerie). These are normal fears. But, can you imagine going on-stage in front of lots of people, Scottish, English, perhaps a bit drunk because the show is on at 9.30PM, and delivering a full one hour stand-up performance in a language you’re trying to learn?
– It must be very challenging.
– You’d need a lot of self-confidence and self-belief.
– You need to focus very carefully on how to communicate your message.
– You need to be able to deal with any possible breakdown of communication.
– You need to stop worrying about errors, and if you make errors learn from them but don’t let them make you lose confidence.
I want to know how Yacine faces these challenges, but also, for me these are the challenges faced by any learner of English, but they are multiplied by the fact that Yacine is also doing this on-stage while having to make people laugh. It’s impressive and I want to know more.

So, this is what I want to investigate in this episode:
– How he’s learning English.
– Doing comedy in French vs English.
– French audiences vs UK audiences – are they different?
– Is humour universal?
– How is good communication an essential part of comedy? How do you make a successful joke? It’s about successfully communicating an idea.

Footnote: Yacine has only been learning for a few years. He hasn’t attended any courses or lessons. He’s self-taught. My professional opinion is that he’s doing really well. His English is better than it was a year ago, and his English is certainly much better than my French!

Yacine might make errors during the episode, and that’s fine. I’ll help him or even give him corrections (“yes please” – he says). This episode is not a judgement of his English, and it’s not his comedy performance either – that happens in Edinburgh. What this is, is an investigation into his English learning experiences and the relationship between language, communication, comedy and language learning!

Click here to transcribe more of this episode using a google document.

Thanks for listening, and have a good day/evening/night!

Luke

yacine PODPIC

179. The Ramblings of an Exhausted Teacher

Last night I couldn’t sleep, and so today my mind has turned into jelly. Let me tell you all about it.

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In this episode I talk to you, in a rambling way, about diverse topics such as:

  • Dwayne’s English Podcast
  • Being kidnapped by aliens from Mars
  • Exam fatigue
  • Trouble sleeping last night
  • English at 7.30AM!
  • The rotten contents of my brain!
  • Selling Luke’s English Podcast
  • Saying “Hello” to you
  • Having a conversation with you
  • “The best laid plans of mice & men”
  • The university course I’ve been teaching
  • Sleep (high-energy bit)
  • What are you doing?
  • On a bus
  • Signalling to another person that you’re a LEPer (secret codes)
  • Giving a wink to a stranger
  • On a train
  • Trains and lifts in movies (Bruce Willis)
  • My brain is on its last legs
  • THANK YOU! (Transcripts, donations, reviews)
  • A special hello to the NSA secret agents
  • Hello to Yannick
  • Twitter – it’s what you make of it
  • Whatever
  • Normally on Luke’s English Podcast
  • BBC meeting: Prioritising Luke’s English Podcast
  • This really is the end
  • Be nice to each other
    ;)

Lovely to talk to you,
Goodnight

Luke

jellyPODPIC
Thanks for listening ;)

177. What Londoners Say vs What They Mean

Here are some cliches that you might hear Londoners say, and some explanations of what they really mean.

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This podcast is based on an article from the trendy/hipster website “Buzzfeed”. It’s about some common things that Londoners say, and what they really mean. It’ll not only teach you some vocabulary, but will allow you to get under the skin of London and find out some real inside knowledge of what it’s like to live there for real.

I’ll go through the list and explain everything for you.

Article originally published on BuzzFeed here.
Photo illustration by Matt Tucker, Dan Kitwood / Getty/paulprescott72/Thinkstock

***Please be aware – there is some rude language and swearing in this episode***

1. “London prices” — Rip-off prices.
2. “Sorry” — I’m not sorry.
3. “Sorry” — You have just trodden on my foot, and I loathe you with every fibre of my being.
4. “Excuse me” — You have paused momentarily at the ticket barrier and I am boiling with rage.
5. “My fault entirely” — Your fault entirely.
6. “I’m fine, thanks” — I am barely managing to conceal a churning maelstrom of emotions.
7. “How are you?” — Fine. Just say fine.
8. “See you Saturday!” — Don’t forget to email me twice to make sure that we’re actually meeting on Saturday.
9. “Let’s have lunch” — Let’s walk to Pret and back as fast as we can.
10. “I’m having a party in Wimbledon, come along” — Please travel for four and a half hours as I live in the middle of bloody nowhere.
11. “Open for business” — Oligarchs welcome.
12. “Centre of global finance” — Money launderers’ paradise.
13. “My commute? It’s not too bad. About average” — It involves three modes of transport, takes hours each day, and is slowly crushing my spirit.
14. “Could you move down a bit please?” — I’m not asking, I’m telling.
15. “Could you move down a bit please?” — I am seconds away from a devastating mental collapse.
16. “Could you move down a bit please?” — If you don’t, I will start killing indiscriminately.
17. “Due to adverse weather conditions” — It was a bit windy earlier.
18. “Due to the wet weather conditions” — A tiny amount of rain has fallen.
19. “Please take care when…” — Don’t you dare blame us if…
20. “We apologise for the inconvenience caused” — Via the medium of this dehumanised pre-recorded message.
21. “Due to a signalling failure…” — Due to an excuse we just made up…
22. “Rail replacement bus service” — Slow, agonising descent into madness.
23. “There is a good service on all London Underground lines” — Though this very much depends how you define “good”.
24. “Planned engineering works” — That’s your weekend plans fucked, then.
25. “Would Inspector Sands please report to the operations room immediately” — Ohgodohgod everybody panic, we’re all about to die.
26. “Annual fare increase” — We’re rinsing you suckers for even more money. Again.
27. “House party in Tooting? See you there!” — South of the river? No fucking chance.
28. “I live in Zone One” — I am unimaginably wealthy.
29. “The area is really up and coming” — Only one tramp shouts at me in the morning.
30. “Vibrant” — Actual poor people live here.
31. “Gentrification” — I am so glad they’re rid of the poor people.
32. “Gentrified” — Oh bollocks now I can’t afford to live here either.
33. “Efficient use of space” — Microscopic.
34. “Studio flat” — Bedsit.
35. “Incredible potential” — Absolute shithole.
36. “Affordable” — Uninhabitable.
37. “Deceptively spacious” — Basically a cupboard.
38. “Good transport links” — There’s a bus stop 10 minutes’ walk away.
39. “Authentic” — Fake.
40. “I just bought a flat” — My parents just helped me buy a flat.
41. “Swift half” — Many, many, many, many halves.
42. “Quick pint” — In the pub until closing time.
43. “We’re going on a date” — We’re getting pissed together.
44. “Picnic” — Daytime piss-up.
45. “Barbecue” — Piss-up in the garden.
46. “South London” — Here be monsters.
47. “West London” — Here be posh people.
48. “East London” — Here be young people.
49. “North London” — Here be newspaper columnists.
50. “Oxford Circus” — Roiling hellscape.
51. “Tech city” — Bunch of start-ups you’ve never heard of.
52. “London has some of the best restaurants in the world” — So how come I always end up at Nandos?
53. “London is full of cultural delights” — Which I never visit.
54. “Gourmet coffee” — Ludicrously overpriced coffee.
55. “Exciting pop-up restaurant” — You guys like queuing, right?
56. “We have a no bookings policy” — We hate our customers.
57. “This pub has character” — This is not a gastropub, and I’m scared.
58. “Traditional boozer” — Pub that does not serve wasabi peas.
59. “What do you do?” — How much do you earn?
60. “He works in finance” — He’s a psycho.
61. “He works in media” — He’a a wanker.
62. “He works in PR” — He’s a bullshitter.
63. “He works in tech” — He’s got a blog.
64. “Working hours” — Waking hours.
65. “Greatest city on earth” — Apart from New York.
66. “You know what they say: He who is tired of London…” — I am so tired of London.

169. A Cup of Tea with Daniel Burt (Part 1)

[1/2] Daniel Burt is a journalist, comedy writer and performer from Melbourne, Australia. He writes for two big newspapers in Australia, he worked as an intern at Late Night with David Letterman, he has his own page on Wikipedia and in his work he has interviewed Matt Smith, David Tennant, Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman, which means he has met 2 Doctor Whos Sherlock Holmes, Dr Watson and The Hobbit! Wow.  In this episode you can listen to us talking about diverse topics such as Australia’s relationship to The Queen & The Commonwealth, his work as an entertainment journalist, his time living in New York, the David Letterman show, Will Smith, show business, and zombies…

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I’m very pleased to have Daniel on the podcast for a number of reasons:
a) He is a bright, witty guy with lots of things to say, and he can talk the hind legs off a donkey (not literally, that’s just an idiom which means he can talk and talk!)
b) He is from Australia, so you can listen to his genuine Aussie accent and hear some authentic Australian English.
c) He has met Sherlock Holmes, Bilbo Baggins, Doctor Who and others.

Daniel is noteworthy enough to have his own page on Wikipedia. Click here to read it.

Daniel is a writer so naturally uses a lot of colourful language, descriptive vocabulary and idiomatic expressions. He also speaks pretty quickly in an accent that you might not be familiar with so listen closely. A transcript should arrive before too long but if you have any questions about words or phrases from this episode, please leave them in the comments section, with a time-code. ;)

This is a two part podcast. In part 1, this one, Daniel and I talk about these things:
The Zombie Apocalype
– Is my apartment safe?
– Would Daniel survive a zombie attack? Is he too complacent?
– Are people who like zombies all loners?
– Is Luke a loner?

Daniel’s Coin-dropping Habits
– Why can’t Daniel hold onto coins when shop assistants give him change?
– Why does he always drop coins onto the floor?
– Is it because Australian notes are so shiny and slippery, that the coins just slide off?

– Or is it just because he is socially awkward or nervous for some reason?
The Queen on Australian money
– How does Daniel feel about it?
– What’s the role of The Queen in Australian life?
– Will Australia leave the commonwealth and become fully independent?
Daniel’s work as an entertainment journalist
– Does he really have a Wikipedia page about him?
– What was it like living in New York?
– What was it like working for David Letterman?

Seeing Will Smith in the audience at a Parisian cabaret show
– Did he enjoy the show?
– What was the audience’s reaction to seeing Will Smith in the crowd?
– Did it affect the performance?
– What are the secrets of show business?
-And what does “getting jiggy with it” actually mean?

I’ve divided this into two episodes. So, stay tuned for details about his meeting with Sherlock Holmes, The Hobbit and Doctor Who in part 2.

Our conversation begins pretty quickly after we’d already been talking for about half an hour before turning on the microphone. Let me give you some context so you can hit the ground running.

Before turning on the microphone, we were talking about some of our favourite TV shows. I mentioned that I watch The Walking Dead, which is a show about zombies. I like zombies and that kind of thing, I’m sick and twisted in that way. Daniel doesn’t watch the show, and he isn’t a big zombie fan. He said he thought you’d need to be a bit of an idiot to get bitten by a zombie, because they’re so slow. Surely you’d see the zombie coming, and you’d just get out of the way, quite casually. I disagreed, and explained that getting bitten by a walker is easier than you might expect. Zombies might seem slow, but if you get complacent – over confident and too relaxed, that’s when you might be caught by surprise. If a zombie is walking towards you, he’s pretty slow so you might think you’re safe, but they’re unpredictable. What might happen is that the zombie gets about 3 metres away, and gets excited because he can smell your brains, and he trips slightly and starts to fall forwards. This means that his falling increases his speed and the momentum carries him to you faster than you expected. The next thing you know, you’ve got a zombie on top of you, and while you’re trying to deal with him, another one might have arrived behind you quietly, without you realising, and then you’re bitten, double bitten by two members of the undead. Then, later on, you’re a zombie too. Uhhh brains! Daniel didn’t realise this could happen. I reassured him, by explaining that up in my flat we would be quite safe from zombies because I’m up on the 6th floor, and my door is very strong. But that you still shouldn’t get complacent, even then. You can never be too safe from zombies, because, well, anything can happen. For example, let’s say, on the other side of the city, some guys have managed to escape from a zombie infested building by flying off the roof in a helicopter. “Ooh, that was close – good thing we had this helicopter!” But one of the guys in the chopper has been bitten, and he didn’t tell the others! He was too ashamed, too embarrassed. He kept it secret. Big mistake! Within minutes, he’s turned into a zombie, and he starts attacking the pilot. Trying to eat his brains. Horrible! The pilot gets bitten and he turns into a zombie too. Now you’ve got a zombie flying a helicopter. In the confusion the helicopter crashes onto the roof of my building – the pilot and passengers are all zombies, and they crawl from the wreckage and climb through a hole in the wall, into my living room, and Daniel gets bitten. Not me of course, I’d be ready with a cricket bat or a hammer or something. Maybe a crossbow. It would be tough, but I’d deal with them. Daniel though – he’d be beyond dead at that point, the poor guy. And why? Because he got complacent. Or zombies could manage to get to the 6th floor in a lift, by accident. Or just thousands and thousands of zombies could surround my building, and eventually break in by smashing all the windows and doors. Don’t worry though, it’s very unlikely to happen… or is it?…
So, that’s some context to the conversation I was having with Daniel before starting the recording. Now you can enjoy some chat with my Aussie mate Daniel. Enjoy!

Daniel’s Video Showreel

In part 2:
Daniel’s move to London
Cliches about Australian people
Typical Australian English phrases
Australian pronunciation
The Australian character and national identity
Australian politicians
The future of Australia & Australia’s image of itself
Sport & competition
Interviewing Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock), Martin Freeman (The Hobbit), Matt Smith & David Tennant (Doctor Who)

149. Backing Up Into The Cloud

Hello Dear Listeners, I’ve been a little bit quiet recently but I’m still here.

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This episode is a chance to explain what’s been going on recently, and to answer some of your questions and comments from Facebook and Twitter. Apologies for the slightly poor sound quality on this one.

Yesterday I devoted over an hour to recording an episode only to be let down by my recording device which ran out of memory space. It was very annoying indeed because I lost all the work that I had done on that recording. I’ve since learned the importance of regularly backing up your work on an external memory card or alternatively “backing up into the cloud”.

I hope you enjoy the episode and more episodes will follow before long, including the continuation of my series on The A – Z of British Slang.

Cheers,
Luke

p.s. Here are videos of Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody, and Queen performing at Live Aid in 1985. Enjoy!
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJ9rUzIMcZQ&w=400&h=300]
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eQsM6u0a038&w=400&h=300]