Here is the second part of my D-Day podcast. For information about D-Day, my grandfather’s letter and a video of Eddie Izzard you can click here to open the page for Luke’s D-Day Diary Part 1.
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Join me on a trip to Normandy for the commemoration of the World War 2 D-Day landings. Podcasting on my feet, some unexpected things happened during this trip.
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Introduction
Friday 6 June this year was the 70th anniversary of the DDay landings in Normandy. My Grandad Dennis was one of the soldiers who landed on the beach that day. Along with thousands of other men he risked his life to fight the Nazis in the 2nd World War. Many of his fellow soldiers did not survive. Last Friday I went to Caen in Northern France to take part in the D-Day commemorations and to see my comedy hero Eddie Izzard performing stand-up in 3 languages. I recorded a podcast during my trip, and some unexpected things happened! Listen to the episode to join me on my adventure.
6 June 1944 – D-Day
D-Day was a very important moment in World War 2. This was when the Allies fought back against the Nazis on the Western European front. It was a key victory for the Allies, but it was also very costly, particularly for the Americans, who lost thousands of men on June 6 alone. For more information about why D-Day was so important, click here to visit the website of the Imperial War Museum in London.
Ultimately, D-Day was a success, but it came with great destruction and loss of human life. The success was due in part to the very careful planning of the Allied forces before the day, but also to the extremely tough fighting in which the Nazis were engaged in the east with the Soviets.
Why was it called D-Day? Click here to find an answer to this question on the BBC Newsround website.
My D-Day Diary
In this episode you’ll join me on my journey to Caen, a town in Normandy that was a very important location during the Normandy campaign in WW2. Caen is where most of the commemorations were taking place (or so I thought). On Friday the town was visited by lots of people including heads of state such as The Queen, Barack Obama, Francoise Hollande, Vladimir Putin and Angela Merkel. They were all very excited to learn that Luke from Luke’s English Podcast was also going to be in town ;)
I was podcasting regularly during the trip. First you hear me on the train, then walking through the streets of Caen on the way to my rented apartment room, then sitting on the steps of a church with my friend Sebastian Marx (from episode 130), then in a car with Yacine, on the street again, and finally in the train on the way home the next day. In the episode I talk about D-Day, my Grandfather’s involvement in D-Day 70 years ago, my experience of seeing Eddie Izzard’s comedy show, the dumbfounding excitement of having dinner with Eddie Izzard. All in all it was quite an emotional experience all round. I hope you enjoy the episode…
My Grandad, Dennis Hallam
Dennis is 94 this year. 70 years ago he was just 24 years old but he was an officer in the army, in charge of 35 young soldiers. It was his responsibility to lead these men off the boat, up the beach and ultimately all the way through France and deep into enemy territory. It was very brave of him, and he fought for my freedom. Without Grandad, I wouldn’t be here today and there would be no Luke’s English Podcast. Thanks Dennis.
Recently my Dad (Dennis’s son-in-law) wrote to Dennis to thank him for what he did on D-Day. Here is a copy of Dennis’s reply, typed onto a computer by my Mum (Dennis’s daughter). Some words are defined below.
Dear Rick,
Thank you for your “Thankyou” card which made me feel both proud and embarrassed – I was only one of thousands.It was pretty hairy, and for me and many others it started long before we reached the beach. The Channel crossing was vile – I was dreadfully sick. At some point during the night it was my turn to be Duty Army Officer on the bridge and I had to climb up there being sick and miserable. So it was almost a great relief to get onto the beach, even though wet through, having had to wade ashore, and even though there were assorted bits of metal flying around. What amazes and horrifies me is to think that I was just 24 and in charge of and responsible for a platoon of 35 soldiers. If there were privileges attached to commissioned ranks – and there were, of course, I think we deserved them – a lot was asked of us.
However, it was a war that had to be fought, I think, and one simply called on one’s training and did what seemed right at any situation.
I hope the celebrations will go well and it is good to know that what we did is remembered and honoured.
Thank you again – it was very kind of you.
Yours, Dennis.
Thank you too Grandad.
Eddie Izzard
He’s a stand-up comedian from the UK. I’m a huge fan. I won’t write more about him here because I’m planning to do an episode about him soon, in which I’ll play you some of his stand-up comedy. On 6 June he put on a special show, doing 3 performances – one in German, one in English and one in French. That’s really impressive, especially considering he is learning both German and French as second (or third?) languages. I was pretty awestruck to actually meet Eddie on Friday and then sit down to dinner in his company. I still can’t believe it happened because he’s sort of a hero of mine. Listen to the podcast to hear my reactions. I was quite excited.
Here’s some video of Eddie talking about how Anglo-Saxon English evolved, including his version of how English became a non-gendered language, distinct from the gendered French which existed in England at around the same time.
Here is a video showing footage of the D-Day operation. To be honest, the video doesn’t really show us how big the operation was. It was the biggest naval armada the world had ever seen, and has ever seen since. It must have been an overwhelming sight to behold.
War Is Hell
“Some of you young men think that war is all glamour and glory,
but let me tell you, boys, it is all hell!”
-General William T. Sherman
Last night I couldn’t sleep, and so today my mind has turned into jelly. Let me tell you all about it.
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In this episode I talk to you, in a rambling way, about diverse topics such as:
Lovely to talk to you,
Goodnight
Luke
Thanks for listening ;)
This episode is just a chance for me to say “hi” and to inform you that I’m still here and that normal podcasting will continue soon. In this episode I give you some news, and then you can listen to a conversation I had with my friend David. Enjoy!
Luke
Here are some cliches that you might hear Londoners say, and some explanations of what they really mean.
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This podcast is based on an article from the trendy/hipster website “Buzzfeed”. It’s about some common things that Londoners say, and what they really mean. It’ll not only teach you some vocabulary, but will allow you to get under the skin of London and find out some real inside knowledge of what it’s like to live there for real.
I’ll go through the list and explain everything for you.
Article originally published on BuzzFeed here.
Photo illustration by Matt Tucker, Dan Kitwood / Getty/paulprescott72/Thinkstock
***Please be aware – there is some rude language and swearing in this episode***
1. “London prices” — Rip-off prices.
2. “Sorry” — I’m not sorry.
3. “Sorry” — You have just trodden on my foot, and I loathe you with every fibre of my being.
4. “Excuse me” — You have paused momentarily at the ticket barrier and I am boiling with rage.
5. “My fault entirely” — Your fault entirely.
6. “I’m fine, thanks” — I am barely managing to conceal a churning maelstrom of emotions.
7. “How are you?” — Fine. Just say fine.
8. “See you Saturday!” — Don’t forget to email me twice to make sure that we’re actually meeting on Saturday.
9. “Let’s have lunch” — Let’s walk to Pret and back as fast as we can.
10. “I’m having a party in Wimbledon, come along” — Please travel for four and a half hours as I live in the middle of bloody nowhere.
11. “Open for business” — Oligarchs welcome.
12. “Centre of global finance” — Money launderers’ paradise.
13. “My commute? It’s not too bad. About average” — It involves three modes of transport, takes hours each day, and is slowly crushing my spirit.
14. “Could you move down a bit please?” — I’m not asking, I’m telling.
15. “Could you move down a bit please?” — I am seconds away from a devastating mental collapse.
16. “Could you move down a bit please?” — If you don’t, I will start killing indiscriminately.
17. “Due to adverse weather conditions” — It was a bit windy earlier.
18. “Due to the wet weather conditions” — A tiny amount of rain has fallen.
19. “Please take care when…” — Don’t you dare blame us if…
20. “We apologise for the inconvenience caused” — Via the medium of this dehumanised pre-recorded message.
21. “Due to a signalling failure…” — Due to an excuse we just made up…
22. “Rail replacement bus service” — Slow, agonising descent into madness.
23. “There is a good service on all London Underground lines” — Though this very much depends how you define “good”.
24. “Planned engineering works” — That’s your weekend plans fucked, then.
25. “Would Inspector Sands please report to the operations room immediately” — Ohgodohgod everybody panic, we’re all about to die.
26. “Annual fare increase” — We’re rinsing you suckers for even more money. Again.
27. “House party in Tooting? See you there!” — South of the river? No fucking chance.
28. “I live in Zone One” — I am unimaginably wealthy.
29. “The area is really up and coming” — Only one tramp shouts at me in the morning.
30. “Vibrant” — Actual poor people live here.
31. “Gentrification” — I am so glad they’re rid of the poor people.
32. “Gentrified” — Oh bollocks now I can’t afford to live here either.
33. “Efficient use of space” — Microscopic.
34. “Studio flat” — Bedsit.
35. “Incredible potential” — Absolute shithole.
36. “Affordable” — Uninhabitable.
37. “Deceptively spacious” — Basically a cupboard.
38. “Good transport links” — There’s a bus stop 10 minutes’ walk away.
39. “Authentic” — Fake.
40. “I just bought a flat” — My parents just helped me buy a flat.
41. “Swift half” — Many, many, many, many halves.
42. “Quick pint” — In the pub until closing time.
43. “We’re going on a date” — We’re getting pissed together.
44. “Picnic” — Daytime piss-up.
45. “Barbecue” — Piss-up in the garden.
46. “South London” — Here be monsters.
47. “West London” — Here be posh people.
48. “East London” — Here be young people.
49. “North London” — Here be newspaper columnists.
50. “Oxford Circus” — Roiling hellscape.
51. “Tech city” — Bunch of start-ups you’ve never heard of.
52. “London has some of the best restaurants in the world” — So how come I always end up at Nandos?
53. “London is full of cultural delights” — Which I never visit.
54. “Gourmet coffee” — Ludicrously overpriced coffee.
55. “Exciting pop-up restaurant” — You guys like queuing, right?
56. “We have a no bookings policy” — We hate our customers.
57. “This pub has character” — This is not a gastropub, and I’m scared.
58. “Traditional boozer” — Pub that does not serve wasabi peas.
59. “What do you do?” — How much do you earn?
60. “He works in finance” — He’s a psycho.
61. “He works in media” — He’a a wanker.
62. “He works in PR” — He’s a bullshitter.
63. “He works in tech” — He’s got a blog.
64. “Working hours” — Waking hours.
65. “Greatest city on earth” — Apart from New York.
66. “You know what they say: He who is tired of London…” — I am so tired of London.
I won the competition again! I got a hat-trick! Thanks for your votes. I’d like to teach you some expressions related to success and failure in this episode.
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In this episode
I’m just going to talk about it for a little bit, but I’m not just going to bask in this moment of glory, I’m also going to present and then teach some phrases to you. The phrases are all associated with success and failure. I’ll also teach you some really common things you can say to someone who has won, or lost something.
Phrases related to success or failure
So, I’m going to bask in my moment of glory for a few minutes, and talk about winning this competition. I’m going to use about 40 expressions. Yes 40! See if you can notice them. Which phrases or expressions are the ‘target language’ of this episode? Listen carefully, and I’ll explain them properly in a few minutes.
So, I came in first place in the competition, in my category, and I’m really pleased.
This year the competition was a bit different. I had no idea of the vote count.
For all I knew, I could have been in the lead, or neck and neck with the others, or falling behind. I had no idea.
I had my doubts of course.
Lots of people reassured me. “It’s in the bag mate”, “no worries” “it’s a sure thing” “it’s a dead cert” “You’re bound to win”.
But I had no idea if it was a sure thing or not. I didn’t think it was a dead cert or anything. I knew there was some stiff competition.
In fact I was thinking, well, every dog has its day. Maybe I’ve peaked. Maybe that’s it. For all I know, most people are fed up with me now. Maybe I won’t get three. It’ll be a fall from grace – from the heights of winning it two years in a row, maybe I’ll just fall flat this year. Perhaps this podcast is just a flash in the pan, and it’s all going to the dogs now. Perhaps my plans for Luke’s English Podcast will just go up in smoke. Maybe everyone’s just fed up with me now, after all this time. Maybe I’m yesterday’s news.
It turns out that I had quite a considerable lead. I didn’t realise, but I was the front runner in this competition. I was ahead of the pack by quite a lot of votes.
The results came through by email, and everything came up roses.
I won and in the end, in fact I smashed it.
I knocked the ball right out of the park.
I won by about 700 votes, which is a clear majority. It was a landslide victory.
And I owe it to you my listeners.
It’s pretty simple – if you hadn’t voted for me, to the tune of 1017 votes, I wouldn’t have won.
I guess, the reason that you voted for me is not just that you’re generous people, but those people were expressing their appreciation of the podcast. So, that’s very satisfying. It’s a win-win situation.
I guess what I should do now, as has always been the case, is take advantage of this win, and use it as a springboard for more exposure and success. Now I’ve got a foot in the door, so to speak, I could perhaps get more listeners, and attract sponsors and things like that. I’m getting about 4,000 page views a day (which is incredible – and I guess this means that not all the people visiting my page voted for me – in fact, just a fraction did – I wonder why. Maybe some people just don’t realise how incredible Luke’s English Podcast really is. Or perhaps, voting is not why they came to the website.)
so the podcast is coming on in leaps and bounds.
Sometimes I must admit that I feel at a bit of a low ebb. I mean, sometimes I feel a bit low. It can be hard to achieve everything you want, and I think that I’m putting lots of time into this without reaping the benefits (although it’s nice to get comments and recognition), but I usually bounce back from that, and most of the time I’m just really chuffed to have an audience, and the opportunity to talk to people around the world.
Other doubts are that I’m just not getting anywhere, and that I’ve missed the boat somehow – meaning that I should have cashed in on this earlier, and that the opportunity to make this into a profitable venture has already passed, somehow. Sometimes I think that I’ll have to pack it in eventually, like if I have kids, because I won’t be able to devote as much time to it, but then again I think I’ll always be doing something related to Luke’s English Podcast. I’m certainly not planning to throw in the towel any time soon. I have too many ideas that I’d like to create.
At the moment though, I’m riding high. You could say that I’m on cloud 9, because I’m just over the moon to have won. You’re probably fed up with hearing me go on about it now, but at the moment I’m top dog, so I feel I deserve my moment of glory! You’ll just have to bear with me for a few more minutes, and then it’ll be business as usual again, and I won’t bask in the glow of victory any longer. I’ll just focus on teaching you useful things. At the moment it feels like things are on the up and up, and I’ve got the world at my feet. Thanks to everybody for rising to the occasion and showing your support. You’re the best.
Vocabulary
Let’s look again at some of the vocabulary I just used
What to say if someone wins:
Well done!
CongratulationS (don’t forget the ‘s’ at the end of that)
Nice one
Good job!
That’s great news.
I’m really happy for you.
You deserve it.
You’ve done really well (sounds patronising!)
I’m proud of you.
You must be chuffed to bits.
I’m really glad for you.
What to say if someone loses:
Commiserations
Bad luck mate
Sorry to hear that
That’s a pity
Chin up
Oh well, you did your best
Never mind
Don’t let it get you down
Better luck next time
Don’t beat yourself up
I have a few questions for you:
-How are the phrasal verb episodes? Are you listening to them? Are they useful? I just want to make sure it’s worth me doing them regularly.
-Which episodes have you liked best recently?
-How was my conversation with Daniel Burt? Did you find it hard to understand him?
-How do you listen to the podcast? What context are you in?
-How’s my website at the moment?
Do leave other comments too and let me know what’s going on where you are.
Thank you very much for listening and for voting.
Please vote for me in the Macmillan Dictionary Awards. Voting closes at midnight GMT on 14 February – so you only have a couple of days! Click here to vote for me. Thanks! If you’ve already voted – thanks a lot! In this episode I shut up about the competition after 9 minutes, and then just improvise, while using the words ‘stuff’ and ‘thing’ as much as possible.
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I also talk about a few other things in this episode, including quite a lot of stuff about working for the secret service, drinking coffee and setting the world to rights over a few drinks. So, do listen to all of the stuff and things I say in this episode ;)
Here’s George Carlin talking about stuff (transcript below)
“Stuff” by George Carlin
I would’ve been out here a little bit sooner but they gave me the wrong dressing room and I couldn’t find any place to put my stuff. And I don’t know how you are but I need a place to put my stuff. So, that’s what I’ve been doing back there. Just trying to find a place for my stuff. You know how important it is. That’s the whole… that’s the whole meaning of life, isn’t it? Try and find a place for your stuff. That’s all your house is. Your house is just a place for your stuff. If you didn’t have so much goddamned stuff you wouldn’t need a house. You’d just walk around all the time. That’s all what your house is, that’s a pile of stuff with a cover on it. You see that when you’re taking off in an aeroplane. You look down and you see everybody’s got a little pile of stuff. Everybody’s got their own pile of stuff and if you leave it you’ve got to lock it up. Wouldn’t want somebody to come by and take some of your stuff. They always take the good stuff. They don’t bother with the crap you’re saving and nobody’s interested in your fourth grade arithmetic papers. They’re looking for the good stuff. That’s all your house is, it’s a place you keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. Now, sometimes, sometimes you’ve got to move. You’ve got to get a bigger house. Why? Too much stuff! You’ve got to move all your stuff and maybe put some your stuff in storage. I mentioned that. There’s a whole industry based on keeping an eye on your stuff.
Enough about your stuff. Let’s talk about other people’s stuff. Did you ever notice that when you go to somebody else’s house you never quite feel 100% at home? You know why? No room for your stuff! Somebody else’s stuff is all over the place! And what awful stuff it is. Where did they get this stuff? And if you have to stay overnight at someone’s house, you know, unexpectedly, and they’ll give you a little room to sleep in that they didn’t use that often. Someone died in it eleven years ago and they haven’t moved any of his stuff! Or wherever they give you the sleep usually near the bed there’s a dresser and there’s never any room on a dresser for your stuff. Someone else’s shit is on a dresser. Have you noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?! Get that out of there!
Now, sometimes you go on vacation you’ve got to bring some your stuff with you. You can’t bring all your stuff, just the stuff you really like. The stuff that fits you well that month. Let’s say you want to go to Honolulu. You want to go all the way to Honolulu and you’ve got to get two big bags with stuff plus your carry-on stuff plus the stuff in your pockets. You go all the way to Honolulu, you get to the hotel room and you start to put away your stuff. That’s the first thing you do in a hotel room is to put away your stuff. I’ll put some stuff in here. I’ll put some stuff down here. Here’s another place for stuff for you. I’ll put some stuff on here. You put your stuff over there and I’ll put my stuff over here. Here’s another place for the stuff. Hey, we’ve got more places than we’ve got stuff! We’re going to have to buy more stuff! And you put all your stuff away and you know that you’re thousand of miles from home and you don’t quite feel at ease but you know that you must be okay because you do have some your stuff with you. And you relax in Honolulu on that basis. That’s when your friend from Maui calls and says – Hey, why don’t you come over to Maui for the weekend, spend a couple of nights over here? – Aww, shit, no! Now, what stuff do you bring? Right, you’ve got to bring an even smaller version of your stuff. Just enough stuff for a weekend on Maui. And you get over… And you’re really spread out and now you’ve got your shit all over the world! You’ve got stuff at home, stuff in storage, stuff in Honolulu, stuff in Maui, stuff in your pockets so, supply lines are getting longer and harder to maintain. When you get over to your friend’s house in Maui and they give you a little place to sleep. There’s a little window ledge, some kind of small shelf and there’s not much room up there but it’s okay because you don’t have much stuff now. And you put what stuff you do have up there. You put your important French toenail clippers, your own readers with that 45-day guarantee, your cinnamon flavoured dental floss and your Afrin 12-hour decongestant nasal spray. And you know you ‘re a long way from home. You know that you must be OK because you do have your Afrin 12-hour decongestant nasal spray. And you relax in Maui on that basis. That’s when your friend says – Hey, I think tonight we’ll go over to another side of the island to stay at my friend’s house overnight – Oh, shit, no! NOW, what do you bring?! Now, you just bring the things you know you’re going to need. Money, keys, comb, wallet, lighter, hanky, pen, cigarettes, contraceptives, vaseline, whips, chains, whistles, dildos and a book.
A conversation with my Dad, Rick Thompson. We answer various questions sent to us by listeners on Facebook.
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Rick is a journalist who worked for the BBC for about 30 years. He now runs his own media training company, called T-Media. He’s also been my Dad for 35 years. In my family we consider him to be like Wikipedia, the online encyclopedia. His knowledge is pretty encyclopedic. If I have a question, he is usually able to give quite an extended answer to it, although sometimes the facts can be a little bit unreliable. That’s why I’ve started to call him “Rickipedia”.
In this episode I ask my Dad various questions which were sent in by fans of Luke’s English Podcast on Facebook. To visit and like the facebook page, click here.
What do you think of my Dad’s answers? Leave your comments below.
My Dad and I both hope you enjoy this episode, and find it interesting and useful as a way of practising your English listening.
Questions from Listeners
Here are the questions that some of my listeners sent in via Facebook.
[4:47] Tuan Do Sir What’s the difference between UK today and UK 30 years ago?
[12:25] André Domen What does it feel like to be British these days?
[13:52] Bruno Alves Which team is going to win UEFA Champions League this season?
[16:35] Stefano Pierini I’d like to know what he thinks about Eastern Europe, especially the South-Eastern part (Serbia and bordering states)… I know he worked there sometimes.
[21:56] Hiroshi Maruyama Why did you (Rick) get the good idea to present dram set to your sons for Christmas many years ago?
[25:45] Hiroshi Maruyama Have you ever had Tetrisitis?
[27:34] Hiroshi Maruyama Please tell me about the pleasure of bird watching. In Kumamoto, my home town, we have a lake and lots of birds come. I sometime go to watch them.
[31:16] Francesco Moscato Good afternoon Mr. Thompson. A few months ago Luke uploaded an episode about the Maya people and their prophecy about the end of the world. What do you think about them?
[32:25] Romain Bsn Hi Luke’s Dad, I’d like to know what are your thoughts about French people (it can be about any topics)?
[35:54] Lucianna Liveira Ask him if he can speak Portuguese or whatever language?
[37:09] Garoina De Vergerach Hi Mr.Thompson! What dou you think about the Spanish bullfighting?
[39:55] Стефан Слободяну Hi, Luke! Please ask him what he thinks about life in the UK! What are the best and the worst things? :)
[47:10] Claudio Natale Hi Luke! According to your dad, which are the most common stereotypes about Italy and Italians.
[50:12] Claudio Natale What’s his favorite food?
[50:37] Khazan Anna Hi Luke! Please ask your dad what his favourite dishes are. What does he think about English food. What does he have for breakfast, lunch, dinner, etc.? Does he have high tea?
[57:05] Mariana Ramirez Hey Luke. Does he have any funny anecdotes or stories of you and your brother when you were children.
[1:00:35] Ubiratan Silva Silva Why 2 + 2 = 4?
[1:02:10] Jairo Trujillo García Well, we could ask the Oprah’s legendary: “What are you sure of?” as a final question maybe.
A general news update from L.E.P. *Sorry about the bad sound quality!*
Right-click here to download this episode.
In this episode I let you know what’s been happening recently and look at some recent news stories.
*There is a sound quality problem with this episode. It’s recorded very quietly. Apologies for this. The next episode will be better.*
You can read the news stories from the newspaper below.
Click here to vote for me in the Macmillan Awards (voting closes Jan 21 2013).
News Stories
Here are the news stories I discuss in this episode
HAPISpoon
For those struggling with New Year diets, help is on its way – in the form of a fork that tells you when to stop eating. Designed to prevent users from gobbling down too much food, the HAPIfork monitors the number of times you take food off your plate, and vibrates if you’re doing it too often. Over several meals, as you learn to eat more slowly, the device gradually increases the amount of time allowed between mouthfuls, until it reaches the optimum gap of 10-15 seconds.
HORSE MEAT IN TESCO BEEF BURGERS
Tesco, after the beef burgers in its Everyday Value range were found to contain a significant amount of horse meat. The investigation – by Ireland’s Food Safety Authority – also found horse meat in products on sale at UK branches of Iceland.
CLOSURE OF HMV
The High Street, with the closure of Jessops, the photographic chain. Days later, HMV went into administration.
BELGIAN SAT NAV MISTAKE
A Belgian woman who planned to drive 80km to Brussels ended up 1,450km away, after following her sat nav for two days across Europe. “I was distracted, so just kept on driving,” said Sabine Moreau, 67. “I saw all kinds of traffic signs, first in French, then in German and finally in Croatian.”
KILLER SLUG ARRIVES
Long-standing fears about an invasion of a “killer” slug that devours crops, eats dead mammals and will even feast on dog faeces were justified last week, when the species – Arion vulgaris – was found in a UK garden for the first time, says BBC News online “The presence of this aggressive species is bad news,” said entomologist Dr John Bedford, who identified the Spanish slug in his garden on the outskirts of Norwich. He became suspicious about the slugs on account of their sheer number (Spanish slugs can lay 400 eggs a day, have few predators and can grow up to five inches long) and voracious eating habits: they ate a dead mouse, as well as a wide variety of plants in his garden. And this is just the beginning, warns Dr Bedford. Millions of eggs and baby slugs are likely to be buried under leaves, waiting to emerge in the spring.
TARANTINO
Quentin Tarantino was on prickly form at last week’s London premiere of his new film, Django Unchained. Before appearing on the red carpet, the director sent an assistant out to request that he only be photographed from the front, to hide his big chin. “He will be very upset if anyone tries to photograph him from the side,” she warned. Earlier in the day, Tarantino had quarrelled with Channel 4’sKrishnan Guru-Murthy, after the interviewer asked him a question about the effects of screen violence. “I refuse your question. I’m not your slave and you’re not my master,” he snarled. “I’m shutting your butt down.”
WAS ABRAHAM LINCOLN RACIST?
To The Daily Telegraph
Abraham Lincoln was a racist who deliberately started a war that killed more than 650,000 people. He had no intention of freeing slaves, who freed themselves by fleeing to Unionist lines during a war that was going badly for the North and in which they became needed as recruits.
In September 1862, Lincoln’s preliminary emancipation proclamation declared that the South could keep its slaves if it returned to the Union. Slave holders in the four slave states fighting for the Union were given until 1900 to consider emancipating their slaves. The Emancipation Proclamation itself did not free a single slave, since it was limited to territory controlled by the Confederacy.
Until the day he died, Lincoln’s ideal solution to the problem of blacks was to “colonise” them back to Africa or the tropics. This was what he told a delegation of free blacks he summoned to the White House in the summer of 1863, when he stressed that the mere presence of blacks caused pain to white Americans. He eventually agreed to the 13th amendment, which freed all slaves.
Americans ignore all this since otherwise the history of the Civil War looks little better morally than the US’s treatment of blacks before and after. Steven Spielberg’s film sustains the myth that Lincoln redeemed the US’s racist past. He did not.
Alan Sked, professor of international history, London School of Economics
To The Daily Telegraph
Professor Alan Sked’s assertion that Abraham Lincoln “deliberately started a war that killed more than 650,000 people” is difficult to reconcile with the facts.
Perhaps it is being posited that by standing for election as president and then having the temerity to win that election, Lincoln started the war. In fact, the Confederates were much keener on war than Lincoln, because they arrogantly believed they would win it easily. Professor Sked states that Lincoln “eventually agreed to the 13th amendment which freed all slaves”. This gives the impression that Lincoln was reluctant to do so, whereas, of course, he was the main driving force behind Congress passing the law. His efforts to secure its passage are the basis of Steven Spielberg’s film.
Of course, Lincoln was not a saint but his views on the position and future of blacks in the US changed radically during the course of his presidency. He had to operate in the atmosphere of his time and in the framework of what was politically possible. His achievements need to be judged accordingly, and not condemned for failing to satisfy 21st century criteria.
David Cowell, Lincoln
DAVID BOWIE COMEBACK
David Bowie fans, with the surprise release of the singer-songwriter’s first single in ten years. Where Are We Now? – an elegiac track recalling his years in Berlin in the 1970s – shot straight to the top of the downloads charts. The last release from Bowie (pictured) was in 2003; the next year, he abandoned a tour after suffering a heart attack, and has rarely appeared in public since.
Why is it called Luke’s English Braincast? Listen to the episode until the end to find out.
Right-click here to download.
Contents
What’s been going on? What’s been happening? In this episode, Luke and James talk about recent news stories and current affairs including:
– The London Olympic Games
– The Queen’s Diamond Jubilee
– The Superbowl
– Charles Dickens 200th Anniversary
– The Oscars 2012
– Women drivers
and a number of other fascinating topics! You will find a list of some vocabulary used in the show below. Just scroll down the page, listen to the episode and learning will occur!
You can also hear Luke’s award acceptance speech. I’m now going to shut up about the award!
DICTIONARY UPDATE
Fans of my Facebook page have voted for The Macmillan Phrasal Verbs Dictionary as their prize. So, I will let Macmillan know and then they will send me that dictionary. When I have received it, I will organise some kind of competition so that YOU have a chance to win it from me.
VOCABULARY
Are you a learner of English? Do you like natural English vocabulary? Do you like games? Do you think the world would be a better place if we all stopped taking ourselves so seriously all the time? Well, here’s a great new game you can play to improve your English. It’s called VOCAB HUNTER (in 3D). It’s not actually in 3D but that sounds better than just VOCAB HUNTER! Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking – how do I play this fascinating game which is called VOCAB HUNTER (in 3D)? Well, simply look at the list of vocab + definitions below while you listen to this episode of Luke’s English Podcast. Whenever you hear a piece of vocab being used by Luke or his brother James, just SHOOT that item (mentally if you don’t have a laser gun or you don’t want to damage your computer) and move on to the next piece of vocab. That’s it. Could you be the best vocab hunter in the world? Can you identify and SHOOT (please don’t actually do any real shooting – just look at the vocab on the screen and say “OK” or “got it” or something) each piece of vocab as you see it? Are you ready to become the world’s greatest VOCAB HUNTER??? There’s only one way to find out, so listen to the conversation between Luke & James, and identify the vocab in this list: (please try to contain your excitement)
This list contains extracts from this podcast. I have typed these bits because I think they contain some phrases, expressions or words that I think you might not know. Use an online dictionary like the Macmillan Online Dictionary or The Cambridge Online Dictionary to get definitions.
James: You shouldn’t be so humble about these things
Luke: Sarcasm
Luke: I won a dictionary
James: We get that. Not that I’m putting that down, it’s a great achievement.
James: I think I’ve heard enough about the dictionary now. That’s all I’m saying. You might have milked that one a bit too much.
Luke: I might have over-egged the pudding
Luke: Which film did you see?
James: I saw ‘Young Adult’
Luke: ‘Young Adult’ – it sounds dodgy
James: Let’s talk about the news. That’s what I’m here for. To cast my expert eye over the week’s events across the media.
Luke: OK what have you come across? What news stories have you come across?
Luke: …the Olympic bid…
Luke: On one hand… all the countries in the world take part and it’s an amazing celebration, but on the other hand London is such a crowded place that it could become an absolute nightmare.
James: Also, during what’s becoming a recession, isn’t it just a massive waste of money? When there’s people having their benefits taken away from them, councils have less and less money to spend on basic services, and the poor are getting poorer, the rich are getting richer, do you really need this pointless festival of sport?
Luke: Ooh let’s see who can run the fastest! In a way, that question is now redundant because we’ve got cars and bicycles.
James: If we had money coming out of our ears and we were very very rich and there was no problems with poverty in this country, which is never going to happen, but if we were living in a sort of utopia, then great, have a festival of sport, but otherwise I just think it’s a complete waste of money.
James: And also I thought the Olympics were supposed to be a very non-commercial event.
Luke: …they are promoting sport by making kids fat, allegedly.
Luke: …but it’s all revenue though isn’t it? It’s all revenue to the government.
James: There has been a lot of regeneration of East London because they want the area to look nice for international visitors, to show off to make London look nice. And in some ways that’s good, and they talk about the legacy, that’s kind of a catchphrase… …it’s not just about the event it’s about the legacy.
James: …a lone wolf terrorist…
James: Let’s move on to the next topic. We’ve cleared that one up.
Luke: We’ve done the Olympics.
James: The best one is when they get on the tube with a massive rucksack on and the tube doors close on their rucksack and they’re basically pinned to the door, trapped like a sort of scared animal and it’s very very funny. Tourists, keep doing that because it really brightens up my day.
Luke: I saw it the other day I saw a Japanese family dithering by the doors of a crowded underground train.
Luke: He was probably pleased because he probably thought “now I can go and get pissed” or something
Luke: Anyway let’s not be too down on the tourists because … we welcome tourists in London.
James: I found myself taking a photo of a van, just an ordinary van
The Queen’s Diamond Jubilee
James: I’d want to stay in bed. I wouldn’t relish that thought.
James: No wonder she’s such a heavy drinker. It’s a well known fact. She hits the sherry by about half eleven most days, by midday she’s onto her second or third. By ,idnight she is hammered.
James: Queen Victoria used to take it.
Luke: She had period pains and arthritis pains
James: I just made that up. I’m lying.
Luke: Mick Jagger is Sir Mick Jagger. He’s a Knight of the Realm.
James: What, for ‘services to paedophilia’?
Luke: Woa there! Where are all these allegations coming from?
James: Sorry I’m just a bit bored today. I’m just trying to liven it up.
The Queen’s Honours; e.g. OBE, CBE, Knighthood
James: cheering on a bunch of knuckleheaded…
Luke: …knuckleheaded sportsmen in armour
James: All you need to play American football is a bloody massive pitch, these weird upside-down goal things
Luke: You can play American football in a park
James: Yeah but not the full game. Not the full contact sport game, because you’d break your neck wouldn’t you. They need all that padding just in order to have a little kick around. You can play touch football I suppose but that’s not the actual game.
James: I used to get into them in the 80s. They used to show them on channel 4.
James: It’s just quite easy to take the mick out of really isn’t it.
Luke: We like making fun
James: Mocking people
Luke: Mocking Americans
James: It’s the screaming and the pointlessness of it all, and the crushing depression
Luke: You’re really negative today. You need to lighten up. Be more positive.
They start talking about the performance at superbowl this year with Madonna and MIA.
James: (About MIA) Her Dad used to be a Tamil Tiger.
Luke: She’s a musician from Sri Lanka
James: “and halfway through the performance she flipped the bird”
James: Not that shocking you might think but apparently people are upset about it… pre-watershed, Christians and that…
James: We’re being a bit mean
Luke: …a bit crazy today
James: a bit crass
James: Co)incidentally her new single’s out today… it’s a publicity stunt… we’re clever enough to say “we don’t care” “we don’t give a toss”.
James: it was okay. Out of ten I’d give it a five.
Luke: She sampled The Clash in that song. That’s the best bit of the song.
James: Mmm, they should have just not sampled the clash and just played The Clash.
Luke: I can play a bit of that song
James: Let’s not bother
Luke: If you’re listening, it’s called “Paper Planes” by MIA
Dickens’ 200th Anniversary
Luke: He was quite a good person
James: He was quite into social reform
James: People talk about things being ‘Dickensian’
Luke: The cliche that London is very old, dark, grey, foggy, smokey, and with lots of gap-toothed urchins, chimney sweeps, basically Charles Dickens…
James: Put that into the popular consciousness
The Oscars:
Luke: The ladies love George (Clooney). He’s often voted the sexiest man in the world, even though he is going grey, he’s got a few grey hairs going on but the ladies still seem to think he’s wonderful. My girlfriend for example, rather annoyingly, still loves George Clooney
James: Bit of jealousy there
Luke: Basically, The Oscars is Hollywood’s way of promoting its assets (itself).
“George Clooney always looks like he’s in an advert for George Clooney” Geoff Dyer in The Times
James: Oh that reminds me, have you seen the trailer for the new Tom Hanks film?
Luke: We don’t really like that kind of cheese in England
James: I hate that kind of really over the top, sentimentality
James: We like understatement. Not everyone, I can’t speak for the whole bloody country
Luke: We do like understatement though, and we prefer it when people aren’t so earnest like that, “well gee Dad I sure love you!”, instead in England it’s a bit like ” you know Dad, you’re alright”
James: Yeah; we’d prefer that. I’d well up at that
Luke: We tend to hide behind jokes. We’re diseased, we’ve got a disease, it’s called a sense of humour. We use it to cover up our awkwardness
James: It’s like Ricky Gervais (said), you’ve got to do a movie about the holocaust,
Luke: A movie about an idiot or a movie about the holocaust is the best way to win an oscar
James: Play a disabled or a jew
Luke: Woa there!!!
James: That’s his words, not mine
Women Drivers
Luke: Women just use a car to go from A to B… They don’t value driving as a way of proving themselves
Luke: The cliche is that women can’t park a car… Surveillance of car parks around Britain, CCTV surveillance around Britain in car parks has revealed that while women take longer than men to get their cars into small spaces, they do it more skillfully. They actually do it more successfully. So all these security cameras all over the country have…
James: Well, the ones that are left and haven’t been crashed into by women
Luke: Ha ha very funny. These security cameras have revealed that women may park more slowly but they do it more successfully.
The stupidest thief
James: There are some very deranged people out there, very disturbed people out there. You should probably say you read that from The Week didn’t you.
Cold weather
James: What disturbed me is, the night of the cold snap, I can’t remember what country it was, like 40 homeless people died, or more, like loads and loads of homeless people died. It’s just such a horrible thought that people haven’t got a home to go to and when it gets that cold you just die.
That’s all I have time to do at the moment. Listeners – if you have some time to kill then please transcribe the last 10mins of this episode and send it to me at luketeacher@hotmail.com
For now, it’s good night.
Now it’s time to say good night
Good night Sleep tight
Now the sun turns out his light
Good night Sleep tight
Dream sweet dreams for me
Dream sweet dreams for you.
Close your eyes and I’ll close mine
Good night Sleep tight
Now the moon begins to shine
Good night Sleep tight
Dream sweet dreams for me
Dream sweet dreams for you.
Close your eyes and I’ll close mine
Good night Sleep tight
Now the sun turns out his light
Good night Sleep tight
Dream sweet dreams for me
Dream sweet dreams for you.
Good night Good night Everybody
Everybody everywhere
Good night.