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230. Can You Learn a Language in 6 Months?

Small Donate ButtonThis episode is based on a TEDx presentation by Chris Lonsdale, who claims that any normal adult can learn a language within 6 months. Is that really possible? What method of learning does Chris propose? How does this relate to listening to Luke’s English Podcast? You can see the video of Chris Lonsdale’s talk, with a transcript below. [Download]

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Chris Lonsdale’s TEDx Talk (transcript below)

Transcript of Chris Lonsdale’s Presentation
How to learn any language in six months: Chris Lonsdale
Have you ever held a question in mind for so long that it becomes part of how you think? Maybe even part of who you are as a person? Well I’ve had a question in my mind for many, many years and that is: how can you speed up learning? Now, this is an interesting question because if you speed up learning you can spend less time at school. And if you learn really fast, you probably wouldn’t have to go to school at all. Now, when I was young, school was sort of okay but I found quite often that school got in the way of learning, so I had this question in mind: how do you learn faster? And this began when I was very, very young, when I was about eleven years old I wrote a letter to researchers in the Soviet Union, asking about hypnopaedia, this is sleep learning, where you get a tape recorder, you put it beside your bed and it turns on in the middle of the night when you’re sleeping, and you’re supposed to be learning from this. A good idea, unfortunately it doesn’t work. But, hypnopaedia did open the doors to research in other areas and we’ve had incredible discoveries about learning that began with that first question.
I went on from there to become passionate about psychology and I have been involved in psychology in many ways for the rest of my life up until this point. In 1981 I took myself to China and I decided that I was going to be native level in Chinese inside two years. Now, you need to understand that in 1981, everybody thought Chinese was really, really difficult and that a westerner could study for ten years or more and never really get very good at it. And I also went in with a different idea which was: taking all of the conclusions from psychological research up to that point and applying them to the learning process. What was really cool was that in six months I was fluent in Mandarin Chinese and took a little bit longer to get up to native. But I looked around and I saw all of these people from different countries struggling terribly with Chinese, I saw Chinese people struggling terribly to learn English and other languages, and so my question got refined down to: how can you help a normal adult learn a new language quickly, easily and effectively? Now this a really, really important question in today’s world. We have massive challenges with environment we have massive challenges with social dislocation, with wars, all sorts of things going on and if we can’t communicate we’re really going to have difficulty solving these problems. So we need to be able to speak each other’s languages, this is really, really important. The question then is how do you do that. Well, it’s actually really easy. You look around for people who can already do it, you look for situations where it’s already working and then you identify the principles and apply them. It’s called modelling and I’ve been looking at language learning and modelling language learning for about fifteen to twenty years now. And my conclusion, my observation from this is that any adult can learn a second language to fluency inside six months. Now when I say this, most people think I’m crazy, this is not possible. So let me remind everybody of the history of human progress, it’s all about expanding our limits.
In 1950 everybody believed that running one mile in four minutes was impossible and then Roger Bannister did it in 1956 and from there it’s got shorter and shorter. 100 years ago everybody believed that heavy stuff doesn’t fly. Except it does and we all know this. How does heavy stuff fly? We reorganise the material using principles that we have learned from observing nature, birds in this case. And today we’ve gone ever further, so you can fly a car. You can buy one of these for a couple hundred thousand US dollars. We now have cars in the world that can fly. And there’s a different way to fly that we’ve learned from squirrels. So all you need to do is copy what a flying squirrel does, build a suit called a wing suit and off you go, you can fly like a squirrel. Now, most people, a lot of people, I wouldn’t say everybody but a lot of people think they can’t draw. However there are some key principles, five principles that you can apply to learning to draw and you can
actually learn to draw in five days. So, if you draw like this, you learn these principles for five days and apply them and after five days you can draw something like this. Now I know this is true because that was my first drawing and after five days of applying these principles that was what I was able to do. And I looked at this and I went ‘wow,’ so that’s how I look like when I’m concentrating so intensely that my brain is exploding.
So, anybody can learn to draw in five days and in the same way, with the same logic, anybody can learn a second language in six months. How? There are five principles and seven actions. There may be a few more but these are absolutely core. And before I get into those I just want to talk about two myths, dispel two myths. The first is that you need talent. Let me tell you about Zoe. Zoe came from Australia, went to Holland, was trying to learn Dutch, struggling extremely … a great deal and finally people were saying: ‘you’re completely useless,’ ‘you’re not talented,’ ‘give up,’ ‘you’re a waste of time’ and she was very, very depressed. And then she came across these five principles, she moved to Brazil and she applied them and within six months she was fluent in Portuguese, so talent doesn’t matter. People also think that immersion in a new country is the way to learn a language. But look around Hong Kong, look at all the westerners who’ve been here for ten years, who don’t speak a word of Chinese. Look at all the Chinese living in America, Britain, Australia, Canada have been there ten, twenty year and they don’t speak any English. Immersion per se does not work. Why? Because a drowning man cannot learn to swim. When you don’t speak a language you’re like a baby and if you drop yourself into a context which is all adults talking about stuff over your head, you won’t learn.
So, what are the five principles that you need to pay attention to? First: four words, attention, meaning, relevance and memory, and these interconnect in very important ways. Especially when you’re talking about learning. Come with me on a journey through a forest. You go on a walk through a forest and you see something like this. Little marks on a tree, maybe you pay attention, maybe you don’t. You go another fifty metres and you see this. You should be paying attention. Another fifty metres, if you haven’t been paying attention, you see this. And at this point, you’re paying attention. And you’ve just learned that this is important, it’s relevant because it means this, and anything that is related, any information related to your survival is stuff that you’re going to pay attention to and therefore you’re going to remember it. If it’s related to your personal goals then you’re going to pay attention to it, if it’s relevant you’re going to remember it.
So, the first rule, the first principle for learning a language is focus on language content that is relevant to you. Which brings us to tools. We master tools by using tools and we learn tools the fastest when they are relevant to us. So let me share a story. A keyboard is a tool. Typing Chinese a certain way, there are methods for this. That’s a tool. I had a colleague many years ago who went to night school; Tuesday night, Thursday night, two hours each night, practicing at home, she spent nine months, and she did not learn to type Chinese. And one night we had a crisis. We had forty- eight hours to deliver a training manual in Chinese. And she got the job, and I can guarantee you in forty-eight hours, she learned to type Chinese because it was relevant, it was meaningful, it was important, she was using a tool to create value. So the second tool for learning a language is to use your language as a tool to communicate right from day one. As a kid does. When I first arrived in China I didn’t speak a word of Chinese, and on my second week I got to take a train ride overnight. I spent eight hours sitting in the dining care talking to one of the guards on the train, he took an interest in me for some reason, and we just chatted all night in Chinese and he was drawing pictures and making movements with his hands and facial expressions and piece by piece by piece I understood more and more. But what was really cool, was two weeks later, when people were talking Chinese around me, I was understanding some of this and I hadn’t even made any effort to learn that. What had happened, I’d absorbed it that night on the train, which brings us to the third principle. When you first understand the message, then you will acquire the language unconsciously. And this is really, really well documented now, it’s something called comprehensible input and there’s twenty or thirty years of research on this, Stephen Krashen, a leader in the field has published all sorts of these different studies and this is just from one of them. The purple bars show the scores on different tests for language. The purple people were people who had learned by grammar and formal study, the green ones are the ones who learned by comprehensible input. So, comprehension works. Comprehension is key and language learning is not about accumulating lots of knowledge. In many, many ways it’s about physiological training. A woman I know from Taiwan did great at English at school, she got A grades all the way through, went through college, A grades, went to the US and found she couldn’t understand what people were saying. And people started asking her: ‘Are you deaf?’ And she was. English deaf. Because we have filters in our brain that filter in the sounds that we are familiar with and they filter out the sounds of languages we’re not. And if you can’t hear it, you won’t understand it and if you can’t understand it, you’re not going to learn it. So you actually have to be able to hear these sounds. And there are ways to do that but it’s physiological training. Speaking takes muscle. You’ve got forty-three muscles in your face, you have to coordinate those in a way that you make sounds that other people will understand. If you’ve ever done a new sport for a couple of days, and you know how your body feels? It hurts. If your face is hurting you’re doing it right.
And the final principle is state. Psycho-physiological state. If you’re sad, angry, worried, upset, you’re not going to learn. Period. If you’re happy, relaxed, in an Alpha brain state, curious, you’re going to learn really quickly, and very specifically you need to be tolerant of ambiguity. If you’re one of those people who needs to understand 100% every word you’re hearing, you will go nuts, because you’ll be incredibly upset all the time, because you’re not perfect. If you’re comfortable with getting some, not getting some, just paying attention to what you do understand, you’re going to be fine, you’ll be relaxed and you’ll be learning quickly. So based on those five principles, what are the seven actions that you need to take?
Number one: listen a lot. I call it Brain Soaking. You put yourself in a context where you’re hearing tons and tons of a language and it doesn’t matter if you understand it or not. You’re listening to the rhythms, you’re listening to things that repeat, you’re listening to things that stand out. So, just soak your brain in this.
The second action: is that you get the meaning first, even before you get the words. You go “Well how do I do that, I don’t know the words?” Well, you understand what these different postures mean. Human communication is body language in many, many ways, so much body language. From body language you can understand a lot of communication, therefore, you’re understanding, you’re acquiring through comprehensible input. And you can also use patterns that you already know. If you’re a Chinese speaker of Mandarin and Cantonese and you go Vietnam, you will understand 60% of what they say to you in daily conversation, because Vietnamese is about 30% Mandarin, 30% Cantonese.
The third action: start mixing. You probably have never thought of this but if you’ve got ten verbs, ten nouns and ten adjectives you can say one thousand different things. Language is a creative process. What do babies do? Okay: Me. Bat(h). Now. Okay, that’s how they communicate. So start mixing, get creative, have fun with it, it doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to work. And when you’re doing this you focus on the core. What does that mean? Well with every language there is high frequency content. In English, 1000 words covers 85% of anything you’re ever going to say in daily communication. 3000 words gives you 98% of anything you’re going to say in daily conversation. You got 3000 words, you’re speaking the language. The rest is icing on the cake. And when you’re just beginning with a new language start with the tool box. Week number one in your new language you say things like: ‘how do you say that?’ ‘I don’t understand,’ ‘repeat that please,’ ‘what does that mean,’ all in your target language. You’re using it as a tool, making it useful to you, it’s relevant to learn other things about the language. By week two that you should be saying things like: ‘me,’ ‘this,’ ‘you,’ ‘that,’ ‘give,’ you know, ‘hot,’ simple pronouns, simple nouns, simple verbs, simple adjectives, communicating like a baby. And by the third or fourth week, you’re getting into what I call glue words. ‘Although,’ ‘but,’ ‘therefore,’ these are logical transformers that tie bits of a language together, allowing you to make more complex meaning. At that point you’re talking. And when you’re doing that, you should get yourself a language parent. If you look at how children and parents interact, you’ll understand what this means. When a child is speaking, it’ll be using simple words, simple combinations, sometimes quite strange, sometimes very strange pronunciation and other people from outside the family don’t understand it. But the parents do. And so the kid has a safe environment, gets confidence. The parents talk to the children with body language and with simple language they know the child understands. So we have a comprehensible input environment that’s safe, we know it works otherwise none of you would speak your mother tongue. So you get yourself a language parent, who’s somebody interested in you as a person who will communicate with you essentially as an equal, but pay attention to help you understand the message. There are four rules of a language parent. Spouses by the way are not very good at this, okay? But the four rules are, first of all, they will work hard to understand what you mean even when you’re way off beat. Secondly, they will never correct your mistakes. Thirdly they will feedback their understanding of what you are saying so you can respond appropriately and get that feedback and then they will use words that you know.
The sixth thing you have to do, is copy the face. You got to get the muscles working right, so you can sound in a way that people will understand you. There’s a couple of things you do. One is that you hear how it feels, and feel how it sounds which means you have a feedback loop operating in your face, but ideally, if you can look at a native speaker and just observe how they use their face, let your unconscious mind absorb the rules, then you’re going to be able to pick it up. And if you can’t get a native speaker to look at, you can use stuff like this: [slides].
And the final idea here, the final action you need to take is something that I call “direct connect.” What does this mean? Well most people learning a second language sort of take the mother tongue words and take the target words and go over them again and again in their mind to try and remember them. Really inefficient. What you need to do is realise that everything you know is an image inside your mind, it’s feelings, if you talk about fire you can smell the smoke you can hear the crackling, you can see the flames. So what you do, is you go into that imagery and all of that memory and you come out with another pathway. So I call it ‘same box, different path.’ You come out of that pathway, you build it over time you become more and more skilled at just connecting the new sounds to those images that you already have, into that internal representation. And over time you even become naturally good at that process, that becomes unconscious.
So, there are five principles that you need to work with, seven actions, if you do any of them, you’re going to improve. And remember these are things under your control as the learner. Do them all and you’re going to be fluent in a second language in six months.
Thank you.

Comments Thread from YouTube

sorin86yt

Incredible stupid ideas. An incredible collection of sophisms. A stupid guy who has no idea about language learning. And it is supported by “studies”. Of course, you can “speak” Chinese in 10 days, but that will be “hello” and “thank you”. This video is a mockery. This moron cannot even understand the role of grammar. Grammar is not some torture that you sadistically apply to students. Grammar is the short(est)cut to make students understand how that language works: This moron doesn’t even know that there are a lot of people who can’t even speak their mother tongue properly. But “EVERYBODY” will learn a foreign language in 6 months. Will they go to their jobs in the mean time? Take care of their family matters? Sleep? Follow his advice and you’ll speak that language the way lowly-educated immigrants do.

 

 

Marcus T Anthony

Have you considered the possibility that you don’t understand the subject matter? What would happen if, instead of opposing ideas which contradict yours, you tried embracing them?

 

 

Radouane Rabei

I don’t know how or where you get the nerve to be able to say something like ‘Incredible stupid ideas’ and ‘A stupid guy who has no idea about language learning.’ when everything you say after that proves, you actually know absolutely nothing about language learning. How many languages did you have to learn other than English?

 

If it takes you 10 days to learn “hello” and “thank you” in Chinese, or any other language for that matter, that’s called a learning disability, you might wanna have that checked.

 

I learnt to speak English a while back in less than six months, but English is not the best example because it is such a practical language (you use 30% less words in general to say something in English than you would if you say it in French), I honestly think it is one of, if not the easiest language to pick up, I love it

 

Here is another genius statement

 

‘Grammar is the short(est)cut to make students understand how that language works’

 

I was perfectly fluent in French before I knew anything about French grammar, and in fact for French that would be the long(est)cut, French is a very impractical language, with ridiculous grammar rules.

 

This man in the video talks a lot of sense, if you really apply everything he says it would take the average person less than six months to speak any language pretty well, I have done it myself twice, and seen it done countless times with friends I grew up with .

 

Does this mean we should all start fires at our local libraries, and ban language classes, no of course not

 

Are you gonna be perfect in that language in six months, no, but it will be much easier for you to learn grammar after if you still really want to.

 

sorin86yt

+Marcus T Anthony Actually, no, I haven’t. I have 20+ years of experience in language tutoring. I tried some of the new stupid fast-food methods and they are what they are: deceptions. All these fast-food ways have appeared for commercial reasons. They fool potential clients that learning can be miraculously shortened, and also that any moron can learn a foreign language. This way language teaching businesses attract more clients willing to take short-cuts. There are also a lot morons exited by “revolutionary” ideas, like teenagers, and really believe that the man who will live 300 years is already born.

 

 

Jaime Benito de Valle Ruiz

For your information, Chris is almost native-like in Mandarin (I’ve heard him), so I am sure he knows a thing or two about learning a difficult foreign language well, regardless of what is trying to sell us. How about you? I guess you must have mastered dozens of languages to make your claims about how stupid these methods are, right? What he is saying overlaps a lot with the advice I’ve heard from others polyglots, so I don’t think it is as silly as you think… unless you are the indisputable king of languages, that is.

 

By the way, while I first had a placement in a language school, I saw a few students becoming reasonably fluent in other languages within 4 months, to my surprise, and a lot of them within 6 months, and I don’t mean saying hello and goodbye, but maintaining a fluent conversation for hours on topics as complex as politics or sociology, or discussing their cultural or banking problems, as well as being able to read a newspaper without effort and comfortably watching movies without subtitles. Granted, some occasional mistakes here and there sometimes, but good enough to function efficiently in a professional working environment (where they also say hello and goodbye too).

 

One last thing: almost no native speaker in any language has any conscious knowledge of their own grammar. Grammar is great for understanding how a language works, if that is what you want, but it won’t even guarantee that you’ll be able to speak or even understand the language. Grammar is to languages a bit like a book of human physiology is to playing a sport. And I know because I am a grammar freak.

 

Paul Coffey

+sorin86yt Given your 20+ years of tutoring experience, I’m curious to hear what alternative methods you would propose.  Like many of the people who have left comments here, my lived experience of getting to fluency in two new languages (Mandarin Chinese and Cantonese Chinese) matches very closely the methods that Chris is talking about.

 

For example, he talked about acquiring the language based on prior understanding (i.e. the comprehensible input approach).  Based on my experience in China, I found that watching movies in their original English, and then repeatedly watching them with the Chinese audio dubbing, was very useful to me.    Watching them in English allowed me to first understand the story, and then re-watching them in Chinese enabled me to take advantage of the comprehensible input environment.

 

Having said that, I’ve only got my own personal experience to go by.  Clearly, your own experience is somewhat at odds with what Chris is saying.  Could you share a little more about what has worked for you?

 

 

Truthseeker1961

People like ”sorin86yt” who have been deeply entrenched in their respective fields ALWAYS have knee-jerk reactions to new ideas and new methods because THEIR way is the ONLY way, and they don’t want to hear anything about it outside of their norm, and the 6 people who ”liked” his comment are staunch defenders of the status quo no matter what advances are introduced now, or anytime in the future.

 

 

sorin86yt

I kinda knew I was going to stir up such comments from delusional people. However, Youtube comments is not the right place for scientific debates.

 

Almost each minutes of this video contains something stupid. We can only try to point out some of the cheats. The most obvious one is the arbitrary duration: 6 months! Why 6 months and not 6m and 1w? Or 5m and 2w? What exactly does that person do during those 6 months? Only travelling by train in that country? Do they sleep? Do they have a job? Do they see after their family? Are they healthy?

 

Any competent language teacher will tell you that “6 months” is meaningless. The learning process is estimated by professionals in HOURS!!!! Take my intermediate-level English course. The “average” student (“average” – another approximation that kills the idea of a fixed time) will need about 80 hours of instruction with the teacher, and then about the double in individual study (homework, practice, listening etc). A rough total of 240 hours. What is that in calendar time? Nobody can foresee!! If the student happens to have a lot of time to dedicate to the foreign language, let’s say 6 hours/day, we calculate 40 days, which happens to be about 5 times faster that the moron in the video claims. :)  (Not mentioning that 240 hours mathematically equals 10 full days!). However, this doesn’t happen in real time. That “average” student has a job, a family, a hobby, (a disease maybe?), he has to sleep, to eat, to drive… Eventually, it comes down to about 6 hours/week (2 in class and 4 outside), which suggests 40 weeks (a little more than 9 months, not bad, huh?). However, that too rarely happens in real life. In a nine months’ time both the student and the teacher will have holidays, or business travels, or sick leaves… It may go up to 1 year and beyond. BUT the orientation line is always the number of hours. Not X months.

The next level of deception in this video is about the student. Who is that student? Whoever has ever taught anything knows students are of various “speeds” (because of talent (of course, talent matters hugely, morons!), previous knowledge, motivation, practice environment, how serious the student is about learning….). What is “6 months” for a student might be “3 months” for another one or “12 months” for another one (or even “never”!).

 

This video looks just like a stupid teleshopping presentation where they want to make us believe that the kitchen knife is the most spectacular invention of mankind.

 

229. Zombies! (Part 2)

This is the second in a 2-part series all about zombies. In part 1 I talked about the zombie in popular culture, analysis of the zombie as a metaphor and then some rules for surviving the zombie apocalypse. To listen to part 1 – click here. In episode 2 I’m going to take a couple of zombie survival quizzes and then do a language focus on conditionals. [Download]

Small Donate ButtonPart 2: Zombie Survival
The Zombieland 32 Rules of Zombie Survival
Pick a survival quiz and go through it.
The Ultimate Zombie Apocalypse Survival Quiz
The Walking Dead Survival Test

Part 3: Conditionals
I’m going to explain them and give examples. For pronunciation you should repeat the sentences after me. Listen for connected speech and weak forms.

Generally speaking, conditionals refer to sentences with an ‘if’ clause (the conditional clause) and a consequence clause. Sometimes other conjunctions are used, like ‘when’, ‘as soon as’ or ‘unless’.

0 Conditionals
These are used to refer to facts that are always true and the consequences that always happen. It’s a present tense in the ‘if’ clause and a present tense in the consequence clause. For example, “When the sun comes up, the day begins” or “When the sun goes down, the night-time begins and all the evil monsters come out!”
Sometimes we use “when” instead of “if” and this just emphasises that this always happens. Using “if” suggests that it doesn’t always happen, but nevertheless the consequence is always the same. “If I talk about zombies, my girlfriend gets scared”. You could also say, “Every time” or “whenever”.

Also, we can use imperatives in the conditional clause. “If I get bitten, shoot me in the head before I turn into a zombie.”

1st Conditionals
These are used to talk about a future event (which you think is likely) and its logical consequence. It uses a present tense in the ‘if’ clause and a future form in the consequence.
*Don’t put ‘will’ (or any future form) into the ‘if’ clause.
“Shh! Be quiet! If you make too much noise you’ll attract more zombies!”
“If we see another zombie again I’ll lose my mind”
Use ‘when’ to emphasise that you think it’s definitely going to happen.
“When we arrive, we’ll need to check all the rooms for walkers”
Use ‘as soon as’ to emphasise that the consequence will happen immediately.
“As soon as he comes in the room, I’ll smash him in the head with this baseball bat!”

2nd Conditionals
Use these when you’re talking about hypothetical future or present events – not the past. For the future it means things that you don’t expect to happen, but you’re speculating on them anyway. If you think they’re likely, use 1st conditionals. If you think they’re unlikely, use a 2nd conditional. Use a past tense in the ‘if’ clause and then would in the other clause.
*Don’t put ‘would’ in the if clause.
“If I met a zombie in real life, I’d probably be fine”
“You’d be screwed if you met a zombie in real life”
“I reckon I’d survive if a zombie outbreak happened”
It’s also for imagining an alternative present.
“If I was a zombie I’d just stay at home.”
“If I were you I’d get yourself a weapon.”

3rd Conditionals
Here we are imagining an alternative past. It’s not the real past, but a hypothetical one. Use ‘had + past participle’ in the ‘if’ clause and then ‘would + have + past participle’ in the other clause. This one’s tricky because of all the auxiliary verbs.
“If you hadn’t saved me I would have been absolutely fucked” (You saved me and I wasn’t absolutely fucked)
“If he’d been more careful he wouldn’t have got bitten”.
“We wouldn’t have survived very long if we hadn’t stayed together!”

Mixed Conditionals
This could be a hypothetical past action with a present result.
“If he’d been more careful he’d be alive today”

Or a hypothetical present with a past result (yes it’s possible).
“If the government wasn’t so corrupt, this would never have happened.”

That’s it!

228. Zombies! (Part 1)

This is part 1 of a two-part series about zombies! Right-click here to download.

Small Donate ButtonThis episode is all about zombies – the undead, flesh eaters, walkers, biters, the infected – whatever you want to call them, zombies have become an indelible part of our popular culture now. There are zombies in the cinemas, zombies on TV in shows like AMC’s The Walking Dead, zombies in computer games, zombies online, even zombie walks in which people get together in large groups in order to dress up like zombies and walk around going “uhhhhh”. We’re pretty obsessed by zombies, and I am too. I love zombies and zombie films. Maybe that makes me some kind of sick and twisted individual, but I’m not alone. In fact, I think that zombies are perhaps as popular and present in our culture as vampires and ghosts. But, what is some of the history behind the zombie phenomenon? Where do they come from? What do they want? Why are we obsessed by zombies? How can you survive if zombies really attack? And, how do we talk about zombies in English? That’s the focus of this extra-special and extra-creepy episode of Luke’s English Podcast.

This episode is in 3 parts (and 2 episodes). In the first part we’re going to examine the zombie as a popular cultural phenomenon, then in the second part I’m going to test my survival skills by taking a zombie survival quiz. You can join me as I make various decisions that will affect my chances of surviving the zombie apocalypse. In part 3 we’re going to consider some conditional structures. That’s 0, 1st, 2nd, 3rd and mixed conditionals.

Part 1. The Zombie in Popular Culture
Zombies seem to be more popular than ever, but why? (The Walking Dead, zombie films like Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead and computer games like Left 4 Dead or Resident Evil)

The origin of the word “zombie”.
The concept has been popularly associated with the Vodou religion, but it plays no part in that faith’s formal practices.
In Haitian folklore, a zombie is an animated corpse raised by magical means, such as witchcraft. Zombies featured widely in Haitian rural folklore, as dead persons physically revived by the act of necromancy of a bokor sorcerer (the bokor is a witch-like figure). Zombies remain under the control of the bokor as their personal slaves, since they have no will of their own. Some people say that zombie voodoo magic is real, but others claim that it’s just a chemical or hypnotic control of a living person – causing them to act like mindless slaves of the bokor sorcerer. That’s certainly very creepy and fascinating from a social, biological, chemical and psychological point of view.

The history of zombies in movies and games
There were a few books and films made in the 1930s that used the voodoo legend to create creepy stories, but it wasn’t until I Am Legend, a 1954 horror fiction novel by American writer Richard Matheson and then principally the film “Night of the Living Dead” by George A. Romero that zombies properly entered popular culture. Romero’s film created the image of the zombie that we know today: dead people who return from the grave – the undead, who pray on the living and feed on their flesh, a world in chaos, the individual against masses of brainless enemies. One of the most interesting things about Night of the Living Dead is the subtext of the film. The hero is a black man in America, during the era of the civil rights movement. The ending is particularly relevant as we see that not only does the hero have to deal with the zombies, he also has to deal with the living and their prejudice.

George A. Romero went on to make a number of other zombie films, and really defined the genre and the whole zombie subculture, including most of the ‘rules’ for zombies and the general standards by which all other zombie culture is measured. The thing about zombie movies, and zombie culture in general is that there is always some kind of subtext – a criticism of consumer culture, a comment on the horror of the uneducated masses or the brainlessness of the population at large. For example in his 1978 classic “Dawn of the Dead” the main characters find shelter in a large shopping mall. The zombies too choose to go to the mall, but only out of some distant memory of being alive – they brainlessly walk around the mall in death just like they brainlessly walked around the mall in life. I suppose the subtext is that consumer culture is turning us into mindless mall zombies – unable to think for ourselves, acting like sheep, easily manipulated by marketing, branding and the allure of materialism.

Computer games took over from movies in the 1990s with the release of the Japanese computer game series “Resident Evil” which perfectly captured the lingering dread, the sudden horror and enjoyment of the zombie subculture. Resident Evil…

Then around the millennium we got Danny Boyle’s film “24 Days Later” which brought back zombies, but with a twist. They’re now able to run really fast! This re-booted zombie movies and it wasn’t long before we got a remake of Dawn of the Dead complete with running zombies.

The genre began to ‘eat itself’ and got even more postmodern with the brilliant comedy/horror/romcom (zom-rom-com) “Shaun of the Dead” which was directed by Edgar Wright and starred Simon Pegg and Nick Frost. This is such a brilliant film as it combined the romantic comedy with the zombie movie. In it we follow Shaun, who is not going anywhere in his life. In fact, he is becoming increasingly like a zombie by not challenging himself, being lazy and unabitious, getting stuck in a routine. His girlfriend dumps him and he has to grow up, realise his responsibilities, change his life and try to get her back. While this is all happening to him he doesn’t realise that London has become over-run with zombies. He ends up having to battle them while also saving the girl he loves. It works on lots of levels, it’s quite scary and it’s really funny.

More recently the film Zombieland was a big hit. That was an American made comedy featuring zombies and it’s definitely worth checking out. Now we have the massive hit TV show “The Walking Dead” which is one of the most successful American shows on TV at the moment. At it’s worst it’s just a soap opera with zombies. At it’s best it is a terrifying look at the ways in which people have to survive genuine hardship – how it unites people, how it tests courage and fortitude and how it can test the limits of a person’s morality.

Rules of Zombies
Like vampires, zombies have rules too. Let’s just evaluate those rules.
They’re ‘undead’, meaning they were dead and have come back to life.
You have to die to become a zombie.
Usually you become a zombie by being bitten by one. The bite kills you by infecting you with a virus and then you turn into a zombie.
Usually zombies are caused by some kind of virus, but the outbreak can have more mysterious origins.
Often the cause of the outbreak is somehow connected with the actions of secretive government departments. It’s usually the government’s fault. They’ve been doing medical tests, testing on animals, or have caused some kind of radiation leak that somehow causes the dead to come back to life and start feeding on the living.
Zombies have a taste for human flesh, not dead flesh, although they have been known to feast on recently deceased bodies.
They don’t have super powers, although their powers are a bit ambiguous. Do their muscles retain their full strength? Probably. What actually causes them to move? We’re not always sure. I think it’s an infection of the central nervous system which causes the brain to ‘turn’ and then operate the muscles, usually with one intention – to feed on living flesh, especially brains.
How do you kill a zombie?
You have to remove the head or destroy the brain. That’s it.
Zombies are quite sensitive to sound, and they can see.
If you don’t do that, the zombies will keep on coming, even crawling across the floor without legs.
Some things I’m not sure of: How long can zombies keep going? Can they swim? Is it possible to hide among zombies if you copy them? If you remove their jaws and teeth do they become harmless?

What do zombies represent to us? Some different ‘readings’ of the zombie as a metaphor.
– Disease or viral infection
– The herd mentality of people in society – mindless followers of religion, politicians, or social convention and the way that zombies want to annihilate individuality.
– The drudgery of every day life. Habits turn us into zombies.
– Consumer society and cultural imperialism.
– Fear of overpopulation and the potential for catastrophe, or natural disaster.
– Blaming the establishment (it’s usually due to a failing by the government, or some big thing which is out of the control of ordinary people)
– USA Libertarian fantasy
– Back to basics fantasy
– Post-apocalyptic fantasy

Part 2: Zombie Survival
The Zombieland 32 Rules of Zombie Survival

That’s it! Click here for episode 229. Zombies! (Part 2)
Videos
Nick Frost & Simon Pegg’s Guide to zZombies:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3

225. Film Club: “Taken”

This episode is all about the film “Taken” starring Liam Neeson as an ex-CIA agent who uses his ‘particular set of skills’ to save his daughter who is kidnapped while on a trip to Paris. Right-click here to download.

Small Donate ButtonYou might remember hearing me talking about this film in a recent episode of the podcast with my friend Corneliu. Remember that? Well, I’m a little bit obsessed by this film, and I talk about it in my stand-up shows, so I’ve decided to devote this episode just to this subject: The film Taken, starring Liam Neeson.

For ages on LEP I’ve been talking about doing episodes about films. I’ve done some movie themed episodes before, but this is the first episode in what I hope will become a series devoted to some classic moments from cinema history. (What Luke, another series – how many series have you started now? – accents, slang, British Comedy, Your English Podcast)
I’ve decided to call the series “Luke’s Film Club” or LFC. (Not Liverpool Football Club)
I could easily have called it “Luke’s Classic Movie Moments” but my brother thought that sounded too American, which put me off slightly. I quite like “Luke’s Classic Movie Moments” or LCMM, for short, so that is the other name of this series.
So, welcome to “Luke’s Film Club” or LFC, which is also known as Luke’s Classic Movie Moments, or LCMM.

taken-filmIn each episode in this series we’re going to look at a classic moment from the movies, and in this one I’ve decided to focus on “Taken” (2008) starring Liam Neeson. Director: Pierre Morel
Writers: Luc Besson, Robert Mark Kamen.

Plot synopsis: A retired CIA agent travels across Europe and relies on his old skills to save his estranged daughter, who has been kidnapped while on a trip to Paris.

Score on IMDB: 7.9/10
Score on Rotten Tomatoes: 58%

This is not one of the greatest works of cinema history. It’s certainly not Citizen Kane or The Godfather or anything. To be honest, it’s a slightly trashy exploitation thriller which pushsd emotional buttons in order to keep you engaged throughout. It has revived the career of Liam Neeson, who is a great actor with a lot of screen presence and gravity. I think Liam Neeson is one of the greatest actors of his generation. Perhaps his most famous role is from Schindler’s List, but he’s been in plenty of other movies and has worked with some of Hollywood’s top talent, including George Lucas, Ridley Scott and Christpher Nolan. Since making Taken, Neeson has become somewhat typecast as this kind of brooding, revenge obsessed middle aged man. He’s made several sequels (Taken 3 is coming soon) and a couple of other similar films since this one.

Now, why have I chosen to bang on about Taken for a whole episode. Well, if you’ve seen the film, you’ll probably agree that it was a wild ride – it’s a thrilling film, but when you think about it, it’s quite ridiculous, and has some very questionable ethics and undertones of racism. But for some reason we’re all expected to leave our brains at the door, and not think about that stuff too much. It pushes some rather strong emotional buttons, and that makes you ignore the dodgy politics and subtext of the film.

I expect a lot of you have seen it because it was a big hit around the world, but many of you won’t have seen it. If you haven’t seen it then don’t worry – I’ll explain the plot and other details you need to know. I should say “Spoiler alert” at this moment – which is something you say before you give away the details of the plot before people have seen it. Don’t worry though, because in my opinion it’s impossible for me to spoil this film. Honestly, it can’t be spoiled. If you’ve seen the trailer for the film you’ll know exactly what happens, and it’s still enjoyable. In fact, the title of the film tells you all you need to know: “Taken” – his daughter is taken (kidnapped) and he does everything he can to get her back. That’s it. It’s a ride, with very few surprises along the way. It does exactly what it says on the tin.
“It does exactly what it says on the tin”

So in this episode we’re going to hear a classic moment from this film, and then I’m going to give you my viewpoint on the film as a whole, and then we’ll go back to analyse some of the language in the classic scene.

You might be thinking: Luke, you’re thinking about it too much. Don’t over-analyse it. Well, I find it hard to leave my brain at the door when I see films and I don’t think I should. Why should I stop thinking when I see a film? No, I like to analyse and intellectualise films, and I LOVE to intellectualise trashy movies like this one. One of my favourite things is to sit around with friends and just take the piss out of a film while watching it. I studied films at university and I learned that any film can be analysed as a text and that everyone is free to take their own interpretation of a movie. I also love talking about films and popular culture in my stand-up routines and I find that they’re a great source of comedy.

So let’s deal with Taken.

1. The classic moment: “I will find you, and I will kill you.”

2. Taken: My point of view (it’s a rant really)

3. Intonation & Sentence stress from the classic scene. (plus some versions in different accents)

The Classic Moment -“I will find you, and I will kill you”
Liam Neeson is a retired CIA agent. While his daughter is on holiday in Paris she is kidnapped. He manages to speak to one of them on his mobile phone. This is his only opportunity to speak to the kidnappers and then save his daughter.

The speech

I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.

[after a long pause] Good luck.

Taken Kill Map

Here’s a review of “Taken” from my favourite film review podcast Mark Kermode & Simon Mayo’s Film Review.

224. Pronunciation: Verb Tenses & Connected Speech

This episode focuses on how sentences are pronounced quickly by native speakers. This is invaluable knowledge which will help you to take your listening and your pronunciation to the next level! Right-click here to download.

Small Donate ButtonThis is the episode I promised to record at the end of episode 176. In that episode I focused on the major verb tenses in English and I explained their meaning and uses. This episode is the sequel to that one, and it focuses specifically on the pronunciation of sentences containing a range of verb tenses.

You know when you hear a native speaker talking quite quickly? It sounds like all the words are joined together, or some of the words are being swallowed or something. It’s difficult to understand them, or to pick out every single word. Sometimes it’s hard to identify subtle differences between verb tenses. Well, just like in any language, English has features of connected speech which make it sound like whole sentences are just long words with all the sounds connected together. I want to help to demystify this for you. I want to help you to understand connected speech in English. It’ll help your listening comprehension, and it will improve your pronunciation too. So, let’s look at these features of fluent English pronunciation, focusing on sentences containing various verb tenses.

Here are the features of pronunciation I focus on in this episode
– Linking (consonant to consonant, consonant to vowel and vowel to vowel linking)
– Elision of sounds (some sounds are ‘elided’ or removed when consonants link together)
– Intrusive sounds (sometimes vowels are linked to other vowels with intrusive sounds like /j/ or /w/)
– Weak forms and ‘schwa’ sounds /ə/ (in unstressed syllables and unstressed words in sentences)
– Sentence stress (the rhythm of a sentence)

Here are the sentences I repeat in this episode
Listen carefully, and try to repeat them after me. Try to focus on the natural way I say the sentences, and try to notice the features of connected speech I’m highlighting. Don’t forget the meaning of the sentences. For an episode which deals with the meaning & use of these different tenses, click here to listen to episode 176.

Present simple
I teach English at a university, and I’m teaching first year students of law at the moment.

Present continuous
I’m from London, but at the moment I’m living in Paris.
I teach English at a university, and I’m teaching first year students of law at the moment.

Past simple
(for) I lived in West London for a long time.
(sequence of finished actions) My Dad was promoted and got a job in the midlands, so we moved there, and stayed for many years. I went to university in Liverpool and lived there for 4 years, and then I moved back to Warwickshire.

Past continuous
I’d finished uni and I was working in a pub, not really going anywhere.
It was while I was living in London that I came up with the idea of launching an amazing podcast for learners of English
.
I was walking down the street and this guy came up to me and started talking, but I couldn’t understand him

Used to do vs.
Get used to doing
– It used to be quite difficult, because I couldn’t speak the language but I’m getting used to it now.

Present perfect
I’ve been up the Eiffel Tower. I’ve visited Notre Dame. I’ve been to Shakespeare and Company. I’ve tried lots of delicious French wine, but I still haven’t done everything.
Today I’ve drunk a bit too much coffee so I’m pretty hyperactive. Normally I drink tea, but more recently I’ve been drinking coffee. I’ve had about 9,000 cups already today.

Present perfect continuous
I’ve been doing lots of comedy. I’ve been doing lots of gigs.
I’ve been working at the university.
I’ve been recording episodes of the podcast
I’ve hardly had time to sit down and just read my book in silence.

Past perfect
That’s when I decided to become an English teacher.
I’d finished uni and I was working in a pub, not really going anywhere.
When I first came here, I’d never visited Paris before, but my girlfriend had told me a lot about it, so I was kind of prepared.
Past perfect continuous
As well as studying at university and college, I’d also been playing in lots of bands over the past few years, but it hadn’t really worked out, so I needed to think of something else to do.

Going to / present continuous
We’re going to visit New York next month
– I might do a special report from New York
– We’re going to stay in an AirBnB apartment that we’ve found
– We’re planning the trip at the moment.
– We’re flying there in the middle of April. It’s going to be good.

Future with will (not plans, but judgements, opinions, predictions)
Who knows, maybe the LEPPERS will one day rise up.
Hopefully it’ll last. Hopefully they’ll take me on again.
England will probably win.
We probably won’t win. I imagine it will be someone like Spain or Brazil.
1st Conditional
We probably won’t get to the final, but if we do it’ll be amazing.
Who knows what I’ll be doing
Hopefully I’ll still be recording episodes of LEP

Future perfect
Hopefully, I will have done many more episodes of LEP and perhaps I will have expanded my work online in some way.
Future perfect continuous (in a 1st Conditional structure, no less!)
If I’m still doing Luke’s English Podcast , I will have been doing LEP for 15 years.

Future perfect continuous passive!
I will have been being listened to for 10 years (!!!)

Video: Playing Around with Accents in English

A Video of me doing 20 different regional accents, voices and characters in English.

I recently discovered a video on my hard-drive. I’d forgotten that I had it. I recorded it over 2 years ago, but then I never uploaded it onto YouTube or showed it to anyone, until now. I think you might find it interesting to hear different accents in English and I think my accents are not bad in this video (although they’re not perfect of course – I think my American accent still sounds a bit English, but I’m trying not to make it too exaggerated), so now you can see it!

On the day I recorded it I had been sick off-work with a bad cold and a sore throat. I’d been indoors all day, on my own, and so I was bored and losing my mind a bit, but my voice sounded interesting with the sore throat so I decided to experiment with different voices, accents and characters. I hope you like it, and find it interesting. For more stuff like this visit www.teacherluke.co.uk

If you would like to transcribe this video, go ahead! Click here for a link to a google document.

197. World Cup 2014 (Part 6: Final Comments)

Here is the final podcast about football, in which I read out your comments from the World Cup forum thread on teacherluke.co.uk. Comments written in the forum have been corrected by me and now I am going to read them out to you. I will also respond to some of the things listeners have said. I hope you can tell when it’s me giving my opinion and when it’s the comments of a listener. Leave your comments below as usual!

Small Donate Button [DOWNLOAD]

This is perhaps the longest ever episode of the podcast! I suggest you listen to it in stages ;) By the way, this episode took me about 4 hours to prepare. At least 1 hour to correct and edit the comments, 1hr40mins for the actual recording, and over 1 hour for editing, encoding & uploading the episode. Do consider making a donation for my time.

The World Cup is now over. Germany are the winners for the fourth time. It’s a victory for Europe for the first time in South America. Argentina played really well but ultimately they couldn’t overcome the incredible teamwork, energy, determination and skill of the Germans. Germany have truly been amazing in this tournament and they deserve to be World Champions.

All in all, I’ve massively enjoyed this World Cup. Speaking only of football and atmosphere in the stadiums, Brazil have been great hosts. It’s clear how passionate people get, not only in Brazil but also in America in general. That has resulted in a very dramatic tournament, full of stories and interesting moments. Off the pitch, there is still the controversy hanging over the competition, with plenty of questions being asked about the decisions to spend millions of dollars on developing the stadiums without giving enough money back to the host community in Brazil, which needs investment. Brazil looked brilliant int he competition, with lots of pictures and footage of Brazil’s landmarks, features about Brazil’s culture and the friendliness of the people. Generally, I think the country looked great and I’m sure that’s going to help with tourist revenue and so on. I really hope that the Brazilian people feel the benefit of hosting a great World Cup.

For context, this thread was open in the middle of the quarter final round, before we knew exactly who would be in the semi-finals, before the shocking 7-1 defeat of Brazil by Germany, and before the intense final which Germany ultimately won, allowing them to lift the trophy for the fourth time. Watch out Brazil – Germany could equal your World Cup winning record soon!

So, here are your comments. As ever, it’s great to be able to read out your contributions and I hope you all enjoy listening to messages from around the world. You can read all these (corrected) comments on teacherluke.co.uk. Just find the page for this episode. You can read phrases there and pick them up. In fact, there are a number of great phrases in this episode – either related to football, or phrases you can also use to talk about other things. Why don’t you listen, read and try to pick out some good phrases and expressions as you come across them?

My Original Comment
The new World Cup thread is now open!
Leave your comments about the World Cup here and I will read them out in a podcast episode.
Here are some questions for you to consider:
1. Which team do you think will win?
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
4. What are some of the best moments so far?
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
6. Any other comments?

Elena Nedyalkova
“If Italy wins the World Cup – free pizza
If Germany wins the World Cup – free beer
If Netherlands wins the World Cup – free weed
GO COLOMBIA!!! ” :)))))
June 30, 2014 at 11:56 am #6883

Zdenek
Hello Luke,
I have been enjoying the world cup. Some matches have really surpassed all my expectations. It is really exciting to see Latin American teams go crazy when they win or lose. It is always so emotional. Football is a beautiful game indeed.
1. Which team do you think will win?
Like I said in the first thread, I still think Argentina and Holland are strong favourites. I’m not going to write off Germany and Brazil because they both might get very far. On the other hand, I don’t think France will get too far. With a bit of luck they will get knocked out by Nigeria.
 I’m now most definitelly rooting for Costa Rica. It’s so spectacular that a small nation like that can beat big football nations just because they stick to good tactics and give it everything on the pitch. The Costa Ricans work their socks off in every game. They truly have won my supporter’s heart.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 Number one star so far is James Rodriguez from Colombia. He has scored 5 goals in 4 matches already and the one against Uruguay was one of the best goals I have ever seen. Other stars are Roben from Holland (despite his diving), Neymar from Brazil (despite his diving and ridilous penalty style). I also think that stars don’t always win matches (and neither do moons). The team spirit is more important. A balanced team like Germany might well go all the way.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
 I am sorry Luke but it is definitelly the fiasco of England, as well as Italy and Spain.
 Another thing that struck me is how strong all the team from both American continents are. Even the USA. I have to aplogize to all Americans. I said previously that they cannot play football or soccer or whatever. Well, turns out they can. Tactically, they have been very good so far. I wonder how much it is due to Jurgen Klinsmann. He seems to to have played a major role in this US team renaissance.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? 
Loads of amazing goals and good shots into the woodwork. I most enjoyed some of the long range goals like the Rodríguez one. And generally the fact that so many goals have been scored up to now. Defensive football is on they wane, hopefully.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 It has to be the Suarez bite. It’s a shame that one of the best players in the world cup, the one who alone managed to send the England national team home, does something indecent and inhumane like that. It’s the third time he has done this in his career.
 Yet, ironically I feel sorry for him. The suspension is a massive loss for the tournament itself and the major reason Uruguay didn’t stand a chance against Colombia. Clearly he just can’t control his emotions, or you think he might really be a vampire? And why on earth did he hold his teeth like that right after the incident? Like they hurt or something? I mean, if you are a vampire, you might as well do your business in a professional manner. 
I will repeat myself but I can’t help not include the diving phenomoneon among my worst momnents so far. I am absolutely fed up with with all the divers. I mean, come on guys, why don’t you take your bloody snorkels, flippers or fins or whatchamacallit and go diving in your natural habitat, to the sea or lake? Like I said in my previous contribution, divers such as Roben or Suarez are just a disgrace to football. And I reckon we are going to see more of this.
6. Any other comments? 
Luke, could you please stop justifying that you do so many episodes about football? A, it is “way above justifiable”, you are English and you love football and most of the planet loves it. B, Your listeners will be happy whatever you say on the podcast and C, I am sure that your football episodes will defnitely attract more and more listeners. 
Let’s all enjoy the rest of the tournament.
 I’m already excited about today’s games.
Zdenek (Czech Republic)
June 30, 2014 at 4:37 pm #6894

Robert Strzelecki
Hi Luke! 
I come from Poland. My country unfortunately did not qualify for the World Cup, so I had to choose another country to support. I really like watching Germany. They always are determined and focused on their aim.
1. Which team do you think will win?
Before the World CUp I had four favourites: Brazil, Germany, Uruguay and Argentina. I predicted Spain would not play well because of being burnt out (Spain has won everything recently). I thought that teams from South America would have a big advantage because of the climate. My prediction was right. From South America only Ecuador did not qualify. From Europe Only 6 of 13 teams qualified for the last 16. Now I think that the main favourite is Germany. Germany plays very well and I predict the most important match for Germany would be with Brazil in the semi-final. The second semi final I think will be between Argentina and Netherlands but it’s really difficult to say who will win.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 I think one of the stars is Joel Campbell from Costa Rica. He was from me completely unknown before the World Cup. But He showed that he can play football. Even Arsene Wenger said He wants him to come back to Arsenal from Piraeus. 
Second is the Mexico goalkeeper: Guilllermo Ochoa. He had a few fantastic saves. He was like a wall against Brazil. I am sure that he would not have any problems to find a new club.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition? The first thing is unfortunately the referees` mistakes. They have made a lot of obvious mistakes: a penalty to brazil, offside to Bosnia & Herzegovina, non given penalty to Netherlands and when Robben was not fouled the referee gave a penalty.
 I have to admit that the best referee so far is Howard Webb even though my country was cheated by him during European Championship in Austria and Switzerland. When he gave an absurd penalty in 90 minutes against Poland. 
Webb did not make any mistakes in the match between Brazil and Chile, although He had some difficult decisions to make.
 I was suprised positively by: Costa Rica, Algiera, Chile and Iran. I was so disappointed after the Brazil and Chile match. Chile played amazingly. They did not calculate, they were not afraid of Brazil. They thought only about winning.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? It’s hard to say one the best moment of World Cup. The whole World Cup is amazing. Almost all the matches were fantastic.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
I think that first is Cameroon`s attitite to the World CUp. They wanted to play for their country only for money. When somebody is called up, He should not think about money, sb should think about how to win. 
Second is definitely Suarez but I think that FIFA gave him too strict a punishment. He should have been fined 2 months without football. 4 months is too long.
June 30, 2014 at 4:49 pm #6895

Andrus Rosenfeld
Hi Luke, 
the World Cup has been amazingly good and entertaining so far. We have seen many nice goals (and yes Luke,girls too),lots of colourful fans and some episodes of cannibalism as a cherry on top. I really like this bloke Suarez..he’s got great teeth and besides this biting fetish he’s been able to play football too.
Of course,sorry about the Three Lions fiasco Luke. There’s always next time for England…
1. Which team do you think will win? 
I still believe that Germany will go all the way,but Brasil and Netherlands
 look strong too. And who knows, maybe Costa Rica will blow a surprise bomb this year.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far? 
In my previous post I guessed that the star of the world cup would be van Persie, but now I’m not so sure about that anymore. As Zdenek mentioned in his post, James Rodriguez has played brilliant football and scored one really stunning goal. And he is so young, 22 years old only… great future ahead of him I hope.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
 There have been lots of surprises in this tournament. The biggest one in my opinion is Costa Rican success so far.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? 

Best moments…hmmm…I think that will be the first goal van Persie scored against Spain – an impressive diving header. That was really beautiful.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion? 

There aren’t many of them. In some games the referees acted weirdly, especially in yesterdays game Netherlands vs Mexico, where the referee gave a penalty after Robben’s five-star diving performance. But overall, I’m happy.
6. Any other comments?
 In one of your World Cup episodes you told us the story of how you met Frank Lampard in the loo the other day. I experienced the same situation some time ago, not with mr Lampard of course, but my co-urinator was former Derby County and Sunderland much loved goalie and Estonian former goalkeeper Mart Poom aka Poominator. By the way, after he moved from Derby to Sunderland, he actually SCORED a last minute equaliser against his old team, Derby County on 20th of september 2003. Goalies don’t score much usually as you know… but Poominator did that. You can check this out if you like. 

Enjoy the rest of the tournament everyone!

June 30, 2014 at 6:22 pm #6898

Miranda
1. Which team do you think will win?
~ Argentina
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
~ James Rodriguez
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
~ It surprised me that teams like Spain, England, Portugal and Italy: four good teams are out.
4. What are some of the best moments so far?
~ “Robin can Fly” When the Dutch scored a stunning goal against Spain.
~ Miguel Herrera, Mexico’s coach with his emotional celebrations… Funny guy 
~ James Rodriguez of the Colombian team celebrates by salsa dancing with teammates after scoring his first goal during the 2014 FIFA World Cup.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
~ Luis Suarez and his bites.
6. Any other comments?
~ Amazing stadiums in 2014 World Cup Brazil
July 1, 2014 at 8:19 am #6899

Mohammed K.
1. Which team do you think will win?
 I think Germany / the Netherlands (but I hope brazil or Argentina).
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 There are more than one, but Neymar And Messy are the best in my opinion .
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition? 
Stadums in Brazil are good and more than what we expected .
4. What are some of the best moments so far?
 Watching excited beautiful girls supporting their teams !!
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion? 
The worst thing is: missing great teams like Italy , Spain and England in round 16
6. Any other comments? 
Could you please give us some information about football history (when it was invented and who invented it and what are the reasons behind its popularity in your opinion?
 And why do you think it’s very popular in south America and Europe but less in Asia and north America? (is it a big question? )
 And by the way, how can I modify my comments if I want ? Is it possible ?
July 1, 2014 at 1:53 pm #6907

Amber
Hi dear teacher Luke, 
Glad we’re moving on with this kind of episode.
 Wicked!
1. Which team do you think will win?
- Sadly, all those I rooted for earlier lost except for Brazil and they’ve been fantastic so far, so I hope Brazil wins. Or Costa Rica.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
- I don’t really see them as some sort of stars. Don’t like that term ’cause it can have negative connotations. And being referred as a ‘star’ often turns them into some arrogant prima donnas or untouchable idols who then usually get carried away with fame, money and everything, so we have divers, ‘ballet dancers’ time wasters… or even ‘Hannibal Lectors’ on the pitch and that can be pretty annoying to watch. Excellent football players who can focus on the game and do what they came for – yes. Frankly, I admire goalkeepers like Ochoa, Navas and Cesar. Also Neymar (Brazil) is great and I’d rather call those colorful fans in the stadiums ‘stars’ (in a positive way). They seem more interesting sometimes than all the divers together.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
- I was very surprised by some referees who appeared to be so unjust thinking we were all blind and had no clue about what a penalty is and what it’s not, what’s clear goal, foul… Com’ on people! I’m a girl and they couldn’t fool me, not to mention you men and hard core football fans who know much more. 
Oh, Costa Rica also surprised me. They’re gooooood! Yeah!
4. What are some of the best moments so far?
- Cracking goals by Brazilians and Costa Ricans. Plus every penalty there was so far, even the missed ones.
- Slow motion parts that show funny gestures on footballers’ faces and their weird body moves. Priceless!
- I found only a few of those lads there handsome and cute, but I forgot their names. Oops!
 And again: BiH in World Cup 2014 for the first time ever. Ole!
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
- Referees made so many mistakes. Technology should be introduced so that they can’t dictate the final result. I wish I was wrong, but I’m afraid the mistakes still being made were precalculated and agreed on beforehand. At first Croatia was robbed in the first game against Brazil, Iran was robbed against Argentina, Bosnia was robbed against Nigeria, USA was robbed against Portugal… do I need to go on?! And sadly, there will be more such things that kill joy and fun. Don’t you think it is better to lose fair than win cheating?
 My country’s team was disqualified unfairly by an obvious mistake by the ref. – the crystal clear goal by Edin Džeko was chalked off for offside. 
Really?! Oh, leave it out, will you! 
And that was, of course, just one of the horrible decisions in that game. To be honest, our coach made a few mistakes, players made a few mistakes, weather conditions were bad, BUT – that was a clear goal.
 Also a goal for Nigeria is still debatable, but many people say it was actually a foul.
 Later BiH won in their third match 3:1, so if that clear goal had been allowed by ref. Bosnia’d be in 1/8 and who knows what else might have happened. And that’s just one of the examples, so who wouldn’t be cheesed off after all that!?! 
Anyway, chin up and move on. 
One more thing, the stadiums are splendid + it all looks spectacular, but too much money has been spent on them… too much.
6. Any other comments?
- About Suarez: he is a very good football player and it’s such a pity he got so low and repeated the same mistake again. No doubt he needs professional help. It’s sad. I feel for both, him and that Italian he bit. And bella Italia lost too – oh dear! 
When this all ends soon I’ll go on vacation to finally REST!!! Yippeee! 
Amra
Greetings from Bosnia!
July 1, 2014 at 10:15 pm #6910

Sabine
Hi Luke,
Thank you so much for reading out my comment! I really felt honoured and I couldn’t help smiling, although I was on the train again when I heard it and to the people around me I must have looked a little bit like an idiot somehow. But then I immediately got addicted to hearing you read out my comments, so here’s another one …
1. Which team do you think will win? 
Basically I don’t dare to say it out loud, but as it’s, strictly speaking, not me who is actually saying it, I may be able to write it only once and as quiet as I can: us (Germany).
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 I’d still vote for Guillermo Ochoa, the Mexican keeper at this point, but I totally agree with you: Rais M’Bolhi, the Algerian keeper, was brilliant, yesterday. Really impressive. The German media all idolised Maunel Neuer [pronounced “noyer”] for saving our neck yesterday, but in my opinion he played way too dangerously and had had more than just a little bit of dumb-luck that the Algerians weren’t able to take advantage of the empty goal at least once. (I’m afraid I need a little bit of language coaching here, is that right? Two “hads” and all that? And even more important: does it still sound natural that way? I wrote it intuitively and now I have no idea where to look up such a complicated sentence.)
Here’s a corrected version: he played way too dangerously and had more than just a little bit of dumb-luck in that the Algerians weren’t able to take advantage of the empty goal at least once.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition? 
Spain, England, Italy. And Joachim Löw (or as i like to call him: J-LÖ), when he selected Shkodran Mustafi for our team. Mustafi plays for Sampdoria Genua and hardly anyone in Germany knows him.
4. What are some of the best moments so far?
 The Interview Per Mertesacker gave to the German media yesterday right after the Match was simply brilliant. He got really annoyed by the stupid questions the reporter was asking and he didn’t try to hide it. (You can read it here: http://www.soccerladuma.co.za/news/articles/teams/germany/per-mertesacker-relived-after-germany-beat-algeria/167744)
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 As you mentioned earlier, it’s the fact that the money spent on the event is desperately needed everywhere else in Brazil. And even worse, everybody knows that FIFA are sucking out the last drop of whatever they can get from a country that’s hosting the world cup, and nobody is actually leaning up against it. Once the first game is kicked off, we all (and that includes myself as well) get hypnotised by the goings-on on the pitch and we keep losing track of what’s going on as a whole. Then FIFA pack up, literally leaving scorched earth, and take our attention with them wherever they head for and nobody cares about the social conditions in Brazil anymore after the world cup has moved elsewhere. I really hope, that the cycle can be broken someday. (Can I say it like that? I’ve looked up “Teufelskreis” – literally it would be translated to “devil’s circle” – and I found “catch-22″, “doom loop”, “vicious circle”, “break the cycle” and a few other things, but i still wonder which one might be a common expression. What’s “catch-22″ anyway?).
 ,A vicious circle – that’s the best one.
6
. Any other comments? 
Oh yes. I almost forgot: You’ve talked a little bit about donations. And I’ve got something to say to all the LEPpers out there: I can recommend to all of you, who can afford a little donation: donate to Luke’s English Podcast! You will enjoy listening to Luke even more!
Cheers,
Sabine
July 2, 2014 at 4:45 am #6911





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Klinger Wilkson
1. Which team do you think will win?
Brazil !!!!!!!!!!!
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
the tournament is definitely full of surprises, teams that we were not expecting to be strong enough are now proving us wrong, and playing in the same level as the strongest teams, I reckon
.
6. Any other comments? 
I would just like to thank you, because I never had a chance before. Your podcast has been my main resource of english and has helped me a lot. when i started listening to it i was just able to understand a few words , and now I still face difficulties but I can understand most of it, and it’s a big achievement for me. I owe it to you. 
Thank you very much

.
July 2, 2014 at 7:53 pm #6916

Ali
Hi Dear teacher Luke,
Brazil was about to lose the penalties against chile. I’m not their fan but 
I am happy that they are still in competition. Can you imagine a world cup 
without England, Italy , spain and Brazil?
 I believe that a final match between Brazil and Netherlands can be 
the most exciting final.
Who is The star? and what is the best moment so far? 
I never forget what luis suarez did and 
the scene when Chiellini (italian player) tried to show his shoulder to the
 referee.
 What would you do if someone bit you while playing!!?? 
It’s interesting that I heard he is going to play in Barcelona after 4 months!! It’s funny.
 And I want to say that I am writing From Iran. I’m sure that you have never been to Iran. 
I personaly have listened to all of your podcasts. We like you and respect you a lot.
Best Wishes
July 3, 2014 at 7:50 am #6921

Vaibhav
Hi Luke, I’m Vaibhav from India. You are right we are pretty bad at playing football, but we compensate that by winning the cricket world cup 2011.
1. Which team do you think will win?
 I think we will see Germany vs. Netherland in final.
2. Who is the star of this world cup so far?
 James Rodriguez from Colombia. He is at the top of the table for the Golden Boot Award.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition? 
When underdog teams like Costa Rica, Colombia & Belgium qualified for the quater final. I would love to see atleast one of them in semi finals.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? 
Best moment will be if Luke presents the trophy to the winning team in Brazil. That will be great.
5. What are the worst things about this world cup in your opinion? 
Three worst things are:
 time wasting, fake injuries and putting too much pressure on players by their local media.
6. Any other comments
How is your brother James? Is he fully recovered from his shoulder injury? & Is he enjoying world cup or just stop watching it after England…
Thanx Luke
 Bye.
July 6, 2014 at 1:22 pm #6981

Jilmani

1.
Which team do you think will win?
Well I’m not so sure now, but I think Netherlands team will win.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far? 
Lionel Messi
.
What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 I don’t know really but I think in 2010 I was so excited for the world cup and this year it’s still not exciting. Maybe because it’s a predictable competition.
6. Any other comments?
Thank you for reading out my previous comment but I’m a girl you said “He” last episode Jilmani is my surname and my name’s JAWZA it means ‘Gemini‘ in English.
July 8, 2014 at 8:35 am #7017

Luke Thompson
Sorry Jilmani! I’ll get it right next time
July 7, 2014 at 3:20 am #6991

Mark
Hello Luke, I am originally Russian-Ukrainian from Argentina, so basically I´ve been rooting for Argentina from the start.
1. Which team do you think will win? 
I´ll be happy with either Argentina, since I live here, or Germany, cuz they are amazing and I love the way they conduct and play on the pitch not to mention the fact I love this country and their language so badly. They both have the potential to win.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far? 
James Rodriguez
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition? 
The way Belgium performed (cool guys)
4. What are some of the best moments so far? 
Both surprised and amused – the elimination of Spain, Italy and Portugal. Surprised because they are kinda super famous football teams, and even though I do not have anything against those countries, I was pleased to see those primadonas being out, they’re not as cool as they think they are.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 The amount of money being spent on it, the football is amazing, but not that important to be valued more than the people´s primary needs.
6. Any other comments? 
Earlier this month I went to Ecuador, and an amazing thing was I noticed that the day Ecuador was playing half the country virtually didn´t work, and the day they won, it was an unofficial day off for everybody.
July 8, 2014 at 11:10 pm #7022

At this point, Germany defeated Brazil 7-1 in the semi-final.
Luke Thompson
BRAZIL 1 – 7 GERMANY
http://mashable.com/2014/07/08/brazil-germany-world-cup-loss/?utm_medium=feed&utm_source=rss
Words that come to mind:
Unprecedented
Extraordinary
Heartbreaking
Stunning
Incredible
Jaw-dropping
Impressive
Staggering

The game turned so quickly. 5 goals in about 30 minutes. Brazil collapsed after the first goal. They seemed to completely lose themselves. Mentally, they were defeated after 3 goals. Germany were excellent, and their teamwork shone brilliantly as they dismantled Brazil on the counter attack. I thought that Germany was going to keep scoring. For a moment I was concerned that there was going to be a dangerous reaction from angry supporters. In fact, so far the fans are just upset and hurt rather than enraged.
This result was a combination of a Brazilian collapse and a stunning display of teamwork by the Germans.

Brazil
This is the biggest humiliation in international football that Brazil has ever experienced. I look at images of the audience in tears; kids crying, people in floods of tears and it’s actually very moving. I can’t help feeling sorry for everyone. I realise that Brazil actually did very well to get to the semi-finals (much better than England for example) but this massive defeat, in this manner, at home – it must be terribly painful. I can’t say for sure how it feels for the Brazilians, I’m just speculating really but it seems to have been a pretty powerful blow. I’ve always admired Brazil for it’s passionate footballing spirit. It’s clear that it’s a very emotional thing for the Brazilians, so I feel the pain. This game is going to haunt Brazil for years. They’re still getting over losing the 1950 World Cup final at home. This is worse than that I think. The players may never live it down. I feel sorry for them. It’s a lot of pressure to carry on your shoulders. Thank goodness Brazil didn’t lose to a neighbouring country because that would have made it more humiliating.
What happened to the team?
 First of all, it was not the strongest Brazilian team we’ve seen. Neymar is brilliant, but you need more strength in the team as a whole. After all, it is a team game. When Neymar was injured and was unable to play I think that must have been like a punch in the stomach for the other players. Then their captain Tiago Silva was not allowed to play due to receiving 2 yellow cards in the previous two games. To an extent he let the side down. The team badly missed the leadership of their captain, and the mental security of having these two key players on the pitch. This meant that they were not quite mentally prepared for the pressure of this game. 
So, lesson learned: Don’t rely of individuals. The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.

Germany
This is an example of how Germany has developed a great team, and a great footballing infrastructure. What a great example of team work. They were amazing on the counter attack. Without wishing to perpetuate stereotypes, this is a perfect example of German efficiency and pragmatism. It shows that football is a team sport. The team is bigger than any individual stars. I think this team is now a formidable force, and this is modern football at its best. 
The Germans in Brazil must have felt almost embarrassed or sheepish, especially the players on the pitch. The final whistle must have been a relief, in a way, because they must have felt a bit embarrassed about humiliating Brazil at home like that, although they must have been delighted too – of course. Still, they deserve the victory. They were brilliant.

On balance – Brazil, please don’t feel too bad. You’ve still won 5 World Cups. Some countries have never won, and some countries hardly ever get into the cup in the first place. 
All in all, I feel sorry for the Brazilian team. Sure, they were responsible for their defeat, but I hope the country gives them a chance and doesn’t treat them too harshly. All they wanted was to bring joy to the hearts of their people, and in the end they just caused them emotional pain. Scolari will probably take responsibility for this.

On Facebook I’ve been saying “Welcome to the club” for every team that gets knocked out. “Welcome to the club” is a phrase you can use to say “me too”, especially if more than one person is involved. For example, I’ve just been told that I have to wait here for another hour before seeing the doctor – “yeah, welcome to the club. We’ve been here for an hour and a half”. In this case, it was a club of teams that had been knocked out, starting with Spain, Portugal and England. Some of the original members of this esteemed club, which grew and grew during the competition. Sorry if my comments seem flippant (which means making light of serious things, perhaps when you shouldn’t). I’m just kidding, but really – if your team has been knocked out, you are in a club of friendly people who know how you feel.

Questions

Has Brazil’s great history has perhaps caused the Brazilians to get complacent? Has the Brazilian football bubble burst?
 Who is going to win this World Cup? Can the Netherlands or Argentina stop Germany? Don’t forget about Messi!
 If Argentina win this World Cup, will this make things even worse for Brazil?

July 9, 2014 at 9:41 am #7029

Mark

ADD.
Now the best moment for me is defenitally the game of Germany against Brazil, 7 goals in just a semi-finall!!! That´s impressve!!! Germany, ole, ole!!!!

July 8, 2014 at 11:47 pm #7023

Yaron
Wow! I’m over the moon! What a game!
 I expected that the Germans would beat the Brazilians in the semifinal, but 5-0 at half time and 7-1 at full time… I didn’t see that coming. In addition, Klose manage to beat “Fat” Rolando’s record by scoring his 16th goal in any world cup.
 I mentioned before that the Germans play as a team and not based on one or two stars… so, in this game it was clear to see. Players without an ego, a team that shares the ball and wins as a team. Well done.
 So, let’s get down to business… my answers to your questions:
1. Which team do you think will win? 
Germany, I hope that they mange to win the final against whomever it will be. I think they deserve it.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 The Germans as a team! 
I think that football should be more about teams and less about individuals. After all, football is not tennis.
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
 Although that there were a lot of surprising things in this world cup, I think that the most surprising thing is the fact that Spain didn’t manage to pass the group stage.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? 
The first half of the Germany-Brazil semifinal match… watching a team score 5 goals in 30 minutes! It was priceless! As a fan of Germany’s national team, it was delightful!
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion? 
You talked a lot about the money spending… I agree that this subject is a bit controversial. There are lots of issues, in Brazil but all around the world as well. As a middle-east citizen, I think that there are major problems that the world needs to deal with without getting too much into politics… I don’t think that Luke’s English podcast should be the place to debate about it, at least not in this episode. [I hope the world can focus on fixing problems with similar amounts of interest and intensity as we focus on the World Cup]
6. Any other comments?
 I have a question about the phrase “at the time”. In world cup thread number one, I wrote “at the time” and you corrected it to “at one time”. Generally speaking I use this phrase when I would like to refer to action that had been made in the past (more or less like “once upon a time” that used in fairy tale) 
Do I use it wrongly? Is “at the time” is a phrase at all? If yes, how should I use it correctly? 
Anyhow, as usual I would like to thank you a lot for teaching us English. I really appreciate the fact you do it.
Yaron (Israel).
“At the time” – use this phrase when referring to a time you have already mentioned. Use “at one time” when you haven’t mentioned the past period at all – no context has been given, and there’s nothing to refer back to. “At the time” – here you’re using ‘the’ and this refers to something that’s already been stated. E.g. “Did I ever tell you about when I met David Beckham? I was living in Japan at the time.” (Here we’ve already established a past event, and ‘the’ is referring back to that)
“At one time I didn’t know anything about grammar at all, but now I know quite a lot.” (Here we use ‘one’ because it’s the first time you’re referring to a past moment, and so it’s just one of many. It’s a bit like the difference between using “a/an” and “the”)

July 9, 2014 at 12:05 am #7024

Mohammed K.
7/1
 – Unbelievable !
 What happened to Brazil??
 I think Germany won not because they are very strong , but because Brazil were very weak, especially the defence line .
I was about to cry !!
It’s a shock for brazil lovers around the world !
July 9, 2014 at 9:22 am #7028

Samuel
Haya? Well. Despite being so passionate about Brazilian football I have to admit that the Germans taught us a great lesson yesterday. In addition they were relentless, organized, more focused and they definitely deserved to go through. Well done Germans! As for Brazil, the fat lady has sung, sorry.

 [It’s not over until the fat lady sings] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/It_ain’t_over_till_the_fat_lady_sings This refers to stereotyped images of operas (perhaps German ones) which often culminate with a final aria by a fat female character. The opera isn’t finished until the fat lady sings. We use it in football to say “There’s still time for this game to change, so don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”
July 9, 2014 at 5:17 pm #7032

Miguel
Justice, Luke, justice. I think Germany deserve to win the World Cup, why? Because they have won because of their skills and football not because of the referees help. Anyway I’m from Mexico and we still can’t get over it, it wasn’t a penalty.

 [Referring to the Robben dive & penalty against Mexico]
July 9, 2014 at 6:34 pm #7033

Amber
Hi again,
That match between Brazil and Germany last night was a massacre. That HURT! Well, the Brazil team was weakened without Neymar and Silva, but the result SEVEN! : 1 was beyond my expectations. I couldn’t help not to start laughing after the third goal and the rest of the game seemed like “not suitable for children under 14″.
 I must admit I feel sorry for all Brazilian fans. It looked like a living nightmare for them and sadly, so many hearts were broken last night. Also being a host and competing must have been a heavy burden to carry. I’d just say it’s football. It happens to the best, if that helps. Sorry Brazilians! 
Whoever gets to play against Germany – watch out! 
Luke, did you notice how their players reacted after they received that one goal, despite the result of 7:1? Like: “What?! who’s fault was it? How could we allow that? Grrrrr…”
 That’s the winning mentality that many footballers lacked so far. Respect and salute! Also a lesson to other coaches about how they should prepare their teams before any game.
 You wrote: “The team is bigger than any individual stars.” I was saying that before ’cause I totally agree. 
I think I’ll watch the remaining games just for entertainment and good sport. And I hope nobody gets a heart attack or anything.
 May the best team win. 
P.S. I also thought Jilmani is HE and not SHE. Hahahaha… Hello Jilmani! Glad there are more girls on this topic!
Cheers!
July 9, 2014 at 8:26 pm #7034

Yaron
More questions.. more answers: 
Has Brazil’s great history perhaps caused the Brazilians to get complacent? 
I don’t think it is about getting complacent, it is the about the absence of leadership. After the first goal, The Brazilians got a punch in their stomach, but they still functioned more or less, but after the second goal they totally collapsed. In my opinion, it was mainly because Neymar and/or Da Silva weren’t on the pitch. I think that absence of the talent of these players was not as important as the leadership of these players. No one in the Brazil team had faith that they could win at this point, and they were missing a leadership player that could encourage the team members (by saying stuff like that it still possible, that there still a chance to win). 
Has the Brazilian football bubble burst? 
No, I think that Brazil was and will be one of the top-ten teams. They have a lot of talent and a lot of passion to the game. In my opinion, if someday someone teaches them the meaning of synergy, than they will have it all (Talent, passion & team play) 
Who is going to win this World Cup? Can the Netherlands or Argentina stop 
Germany? Don’t forget about Messi!
For sure, whoever will play against Germany in the final will be the underdog, but after all it is football, you can never know… all the options are still open. Whatever will happen, I really hope that it will be a fair game.
 If Argentina win this World Cup, will this make things even worse for Brazil?
 I think that the Brazilians hit rock bottom yesterday, and it can’t be worse than that. So my answer is no.
 I would say at this point that I really feel sorry for the Brazilians and it really was uncomfortable watching Brazil supporters broken up as well as watching the Brazilian players cry at the end of the game. 
By the way: what’s the story with all these rainy men?… football players are men, aren’t they?… is football is about diving and crying? Shouldn’t it be a tough game? Just kidding… it’s just me writing nonsense… :) 
Ok, in about an half hour the next semifinal will kick off. Whatever will happen in it and whatever will happen in the finals, I remind to all of us (winner and loser): Always look at the bright side of life  
Thanks again and bye bye bye bye 
Yaron
July 10, 2014 at 2:36 pm #7036

Mark
In response to the utterance that Brazil got weakened without Neymar, that’s, I think, a good wake up call for them – not to put all your expectation on just one player, this is a team sport, there should be a strong team, not just one person.
By the way, I wonder why your country, Luke, is represented by just England, not the UK, not the Great Britain?
July 10, 2014 at 4:46 pm #7037
[The UK is actually a union of four countries and in most sports the players represent one of those 4 countries, except in the Olympics]

Luciana
Hello teacher Luke, I’m Luciana from Brasil = )
1. Which team do you think will win? I hope Argentina. Nothing can be worse to Brasil than what happened in the semi-final. Having said that, I hope that Argentina can honour Latin America.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far? 
Costa Rica’s team. ahahahah
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 1- That it is happening here in Brasil (for the well known reasons) 
2- Ronaldo as commentator (someone said that with two more remarks he will equal Pelé’s stupidity record)
 3- Costa Rica’s elimination
 4- Brasil fans booing the team when it’s losing. 
6. Any other comments? 
What I really came here to tell you is this: Do you know who is to blame for that disastrous Germany 7×1 Brasil? Mick Jagger.
 Brasil losing the match is not his fault, but since I’ve seen the promotional video about Monty Phyton’s reunion, and noticed that Mick Jagger was watching a football match narrated by one of the most known (and most disliked) brasilian football narrators, Galvão Bueno, I sensed disaster…
ps. Just so you know, it’s a well known fact here in Brazil that everytime Mick declares his support for Brasil, the team loses the match. He is what we call “pé-frio” (cold feet in a direct translation, someone who gives bad luck to others).
July 13, 2014 at 4:12 am #7039

jhon vidal 


hi, Luke Fluke! I remember in one of your old podcasts you mention that. Haha, 
I´m just kidding!! I’d like to congratulate you on your great podcast because I’ve listened to it for 1 year and a half and it has helped me a lot. Thanks!!
 Sorry for all my typing errors.
 By the way I am Jhon from mexico!
1. Which team do you think will win?
 obviously Germany.
2. Who is the star of the World Cup so far?
 I think Mullen from Germany
3. What has surprised you the most in this competition?
Big teams have not passed next round such as a Spain, Portugal, England, Italy and
 many South American teams qualified such as Costa Rica and the most recent disappointment of Brazil. Nobody expected this final result 7-1.
4. What are some of the best moments so far? Well, the most recent has been the good game of Germany because the game Holland vs Argentina for me was a little boring.
5. What are the worst things about this World Cup in your opinion?
 Let me see… I think the bite of Luis Suarez, the acting or performances by Robben and the refereeing in some games.
6. Any other comments? 
I hope Germany win because this is the team that I support after eliminated Mexico. It 
would be nice if you did a podcast on schools in Uk because I´m interested in studying in a school in the Uk. 
Also it would be good to upload videos on youtube as you did in the interviews in london.
 By the way you’ve got a good sense of humor I laugh a lot with your sarcasm – hilarious!! haha 
thanks for all Luke!!
cheers!

July 13, 2014 at 1:17 pm #7041

evelin
Hello Luke
Unfortunately , it is time to say goodbye to World Cup 2014 , which was amazingly eventful and entertaining. Today’s final match is going to be fascinating , because in my opinion even if everybody bets on the German team, I think there is no favourite in such an important game , both teams have equal chance to win . Before the first Argentina match I was worried about their defence but now it turned out that they have probably the best defence , led by Javier “Rambo” Mascherano I can’t wait to see Leo Messi with the World Cup ! My prediction : Argentina will win in a penalty shootout. 
PS . Don’t worry Brazil ! It could be worse…. actually…no it couldn’t
July 15, 2014 at 11:00 am #7043

Luke Thompson
Hello, this thread is now closed and I plan to upload a podcast with your comments in the next day or two.
Thanks for commenting!
If you have other comments to make, you can write in other forum threads.
Cheers,
Luke
WORLDCUPPIC6

196. Cycling from Coast to Coast

Almost exactly one year ago, Ben Fisher was on the podcast telling us about his cycling trip from London to Paris. Now he’s back to tell us about his latest cycling adventure. Last time he cycled a total of 484.7km. This time he more than doubled that distance cycling 1223.42km from the north coast of France all the way down to the south coast. It was a much longer and more difficult trip and he’s here on the podcast to tell us all about it! Right-click here to download this episode.

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Click here to revisit 136. Cycling from London to Paris. (Have I really uploaded 60 episodes in the last 12 months? Wow.)

Click here to visit Ben’s blog where you can read all about this cycling trip, look at photos and read all the stats about his journey. http://drainbamms.wordpress.com

Follow Ben on Twitter @DrainBamms: https://twitter.com/drainbamms

Click here to visit WarmShowers.org. That’s the website for cyclists who would like to share accommodation with each other. www.warmshowers.org

If you’d like to contribute a transcript for this, click here to access a google doc for 196 Cycling from Coast to Coast.

Picture (c) Kate Fisher (Ben’s sister) – Check out her great illustrations at www.damefishy.com
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195. British Comedy: Monty Python’s Flying Circus

The series about British Comedy continues with everything you need to know about Monty Python’s Flying Circus and an analysis of The (Dead) Parrot Sketch. Right-click here to download this episode.

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And now for something completely different. It’s…Monty Python’s Flying Circus

Introduction
This episode is the next in the series about British Comedy. I had to do an episode about Python. They’re such an important, popular and celebrated part of our comedy history. They’re very well rated by lots of people. Some say they’re overrated. I don’t think so. I like almost all of their comedy. They’ve been very influential on popular culture in general, but more specifically on plenty of other comedians and TV shows in the UK and in USA too (e.g. The Simpsons and South Park probably wouldn’t exist without Python). Also, this year they are in the middle of a comeback, putting on stage performances of their greatest material live at the 02 Arena in London. Live performances will be broadcast in cinemas around the world too, so check out their website for more information if you want to see it. Personally, I’d like to see the reunion tour, but I’m quite happy watching their sketches and movies on TV and listening to the records on my mp3 player as I walk around. I’m really happy to share my love of Python with you. Some of you will already be aware of them, some of you won’t. I’ve already played you some of their stuff before, including the Four Yorkshiremen, The Argument Sketch, Swamp Castle and the Silly Election. So I’m sure already pretty familiar with them. Anyway, this episode should be your go-to guide for everything you need to know about Monty Python. You can use it to make sure you are fully clued up about this essential part of modern British culture.

I could go on and on about it for ages, talking about how special their comedy is to me personally (and plenty of other people) but instead I think it’s best to go straight to their comedy and let it speak for itself. I realise that by talking about it a lot, I’m just building it up and then you’ll find it anti-climactic.

So, after I’ve explained a few things about Python, we’re also going to spend some time listening to one of their sketches. I’ll explain things so that you understand it all fully, just like a native speaker – and a native speaker who gets all the jokes. Hopefully this will just be one single episode. I’ll try and keep it brief. In a way this is one of the hardest episodes of LEP I’ve ever done because it’s hard to get across in a simple way the appeal of Monty Python. Also, I can’t choose a sketch. I like them all too much. I also realise that you might not find it funny. Never mind. The main thing is that you learn some things about culture and some language and if you find it funny that’s a bonus. SO DON’T EXPECT TO FIND ANY OF THIS FUNNY, ALRIGHT? NO FUN IN THIS EPISODE!

Everything You Need To Know about Monty Python’s Flying Circus (and perhaps some things you don’t really need to know)
Remember, this is not a blog post, it’s just some text which accompanies this audio episode. So, to get the full information you should listen to the podcast.
Who are they?
Why are they called “Monty Python’s Flying Circus”
Where did they come from?
What did they do?
What was so special about it? Why do people like it so much?
The wild, crazy & anarchic approach.
The postmodern approach – breaking all the rules.
The performances.
The writing.
The originality (although this kind of thing had been started by The Goon Show, Spike Milligan & Peter Cook)
The animations.
The level of intelligence, combined with the readiness to be completely stupid too.
What effect has their work had on culture in general?
Is their comedy still funny or relevant today?
What does their comedy tell us about the British sense of humour?
What are some of the most famous Monty Python moments?

Sketches
Let’s listen to some sketches by Python. Below is a list of some of my favourite sketches by Monty Python. You can see most of them on their YouTube channel . I strongly suggest you buy their work too. Here’s a list on Amazon of pretty much everything you can purchase by Monty Python’s Flying Circus. My favourites are the movies “Monty Python & The Holy Grail”, “Life of Brian”, “Live at the Hollywood Bowl” and the audio recording of “Live at Drury Lane”. Don’t bother with the TV show unless you’re a hardcore fan. You could just get “The Best of Monty Python’s Flying Circus” if you want to see some of their sketches. Otherwise, just check out videos from their YouTube channel here.

I will probably come back to Python sketches in the future because there’s no way I can cover everything in this episode. I’ll be lucky to get through more than 2 sketches to be honest.

PLEASE DO NOT EXPECT TO FIND ANYTHING FUNNY.

The Parrot Sketch
I can’t really explain why this is ‘funny’ – in fact many people agree that it isn’t their funniest sketch, but it’s definitely the most famous one. Most people know some lines from it. Some people know every line and can recite the entire sketch from memory. Thatcher quoted it in a speech once. Let’s listen and find out what all the fuss is about.

Script for the Parrot Sketch
MR. PRALINE
John Cleese
SHOP OWNER
Michael Palin
The sketch:

A customer enters a pet shop.

Mr. Praline: ‘Ello, I wish to register a complaint.

(The owner does not respond.)

Mr. Praline: ‘Ello, Miss?

Owner: What do you mean “miss”?

Mr. Praline: (pause)I’m sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint!

Owner: We’re closin’ for lunch.

Mr. Praline: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.

Owner: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue…What’s,uh…What’s wrong with it?

Mr. Praline: I’ll tell you what’s wrong with it, my lad. ‘E’s dead, that’s what’s wrong with it!

Owner: No, no, ‘e’s uh,…he’s resting.

Mr. Praline: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I’m looking at one right now.

Owner: No no he’s not dead, he’s, he’s restin’! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn’it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

Mr. Praline: The plumage don’t enter into it. It’s stone dead.

Owner: Nononono, no, no! ‘E’s resting!

Mr. Praline: All right then, if he’s restin’, I’ll wake him up! (shouting at the cage) ‘Ello, Mister Polly Parrot! I’ve got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you show…

(owner hits the cage)

Owner: There, he moved!

Mr. Praline: No, he didn’t, that was you hitting the cage!

Owner: I never!!

Mr. Praline: Yes, you did!

Owner: I never, never did anything…

Mr. Praline: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) ‘ELLO POLLY!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o’clock alarm call!

(Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.)

Mr. Praline: Now that’s what I call a dead parrot.

Owner: No, no…..No, ‘e’s stunned!

Mr. Praline: STUNNED?!?

Owner: Yeah! You stunned him, just as he was wakin’ up! Norwegian Blues stun easily, major.

Mr. Praline: Um…now look…now look, mate, I’ve definitely ‘ad enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not ‘alf an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein’ tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk.

Owner: Well, he’s…he’s, ah…probably pining for the fjords.

Mr. Praline: PININ’ for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that?, look, why did he fall flat on his back the moment I got ‘im home?

Owner: The Norwegian Blue prefers keepin’ on it’s back! Remarkable bird, id’nit, squire? Lovely plumage!

Mr. Praline: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there.

(pause)

Owner: Well, o’course it was nailed there! If I hadn’t nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent ’em apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee!

Mr. Praline: “VOOM”?!? Mate, this bird wouldn’t “voom” if you put four million volts through it! ‘E’s bleedin’ demised!

Owner: No no! ‘E’s pining!

Mr. Praline: ‘E’s not pinin’! ‘E’s passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! ‘E’s expired and gone to meet ‘is maker! ‘E’s a stiff! Bereft of life, ‘e rests in peace! If you hadn’t nailed ‘im to the perch ‘e’d be pushing up the daisies! ‘Is metabolic processes are now ‘istory! ‘E’s off the twig! ‘E’s kicked the bucket, ‘e’s shuffled off ‘is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin’ choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!

(pause)

Owner: Well, I’d better replace it, then. (he takes a quick peek behind the counter) Sorry squire, I’ve had a look ’round the back of the shop, and uh, we’re right out of parrots.

Mr. Praline: I see. I see, I get the picture.

Owner: (pause) I got a slug.

(pause)

Mr. Praline: Pray, does it talk?

Owner: Nnnnot really.

Mr. Praline: WELL IT’S HARDLY A BLOODY REPLACEMENT, IS IT?!!???!!?

Owner: N-no, I guess not. (gets ashamed, looks at his feet)

Mr. Praline: Well.

(pause)

Owner: (quietly) D’you…. d’you want to come back to my place?

Mr. Praline: (looks around) Yeah, all right, sure.

Alternate ending:

Mr. Praline: (sweet as sugar) Pray, does it talk?

Owner: Nnnnot really.

Mr. Praline: WELL IT’S HARDLY A BLOODY REPLACEMENT, IS IT?!!???!!?

The Dead Parrot Sketch (The Studio Version)

The Dead Parrot Sketch (Live version – funnier)

The Pythons Talk about The Dead Parrot Sketch

Margaret Thatcher does The Dead Parrot Sketch

Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones talks about the Python reunion, saying they are… “a bunch of wrinkly old men trying to relive their youth. The best one died years ago. Maybe back in the 70s it was fantastic! But, you know, we’ve seen it all before!” Of course he is making fun of himself (the same things are true about the Stones) and yet also showing his respect for Monty Python. At the end of this sketch Mick agrees to perform The Dead Parrot Sketch in the next Rolling Stones concert.

Other Sketches That I like
Spam (This is the origin of the word spam on the internet. It’s completely farcical)
Witch Burning
The Peasants
What have the Romans ever done for us?
The Funniest Joke in the World
The Communists Quiz
The Philosopher’s Football Match
The Spanish Inquisition
The Ministry of Silly Walks
The songs!
The Lumberjack Song, The Philosopher Song, Always Look on the Bright Side of Life.
The Dirty Fork (The Restaurant Sketch)
Nudge Nudge Wink Wink
+ many more…

Terry Gilliam’s Animations

Famous American Comedians Talk About Why They Love Monty Python

Why do people like Monty Python so much? (Comments from YAHOO ANSWERS)
ORIGINAL QUESTION: Hysteria98: Why do people find Monty Python funny? The only reason I can think of why, is that its so ridiculous.
Best AnswerVoter’s Choice
It’s ridiculously funny and funnily ridiculous. It’s genius.
you have to look at it in the context of the time it was on TV for the first time- in the late 60s and early 70s nothing like it had ever been seen before- the sheer randomness was exciting as you never knew what was going to happen next. Remember there were only 2 TV channels in the UK back then, so Monty Python was hysterically fun and funny

Black Star Deceiver answered 4 years ago
Oh it’s unpredictable, so simple and yet sheer genius. The guys are legends.
Long Live the comedy of Monty Python!

Mike answered 4 years ago
Monty python has not dated at all, it was funny then and funny now, ridiculous situations are funny no matter what decade, for instance the guy who wrote the worlds funniest joke, it was so funny he died laughing at it, so the army used the joke and translated it to german to shout at the enemy, instead of shooting at them !

Alice answered 4 years ago
I can understand your question perfectly.
Its probably a generational thing.
I’ve noticed a lot of older friends of mine really love it but i just dont get where the “Funny” is…
It doesn’t even make me smile. I like comedy that examines people, their personalities and situations that they get into.

Alan Partridge
Father Ted
Peep Show

kaznaid answered 4 years ago
Sadly, I remember MP when it was first broadcast on BBC 1 in 1969. Actually, I didn’t find it very funny but I was only 12 years old.

I only started to laugh after I watched Life of Brian and Holy Grail. Some of it is very silly but, last week, I saw the Upper Class Twit Olympics on the BBC’s celebration of the programme, and I laughed so much I cried!!

So, it just shows that it obviously does not date … and it can grow on you although it did take 40 years!!!

Intrinsic Random Event answered 4 years ago
They are the Dali of comedy

legs answered 4 years ago
It was very much of its time – groundbreaking – much loved by many of my generation. I was studying for GCEs & my English teacher was a great fan as were most of his pupils. It was a must see for many of us after all we only had BBC1 & ITV, then BBC2 came along but not the multi-channel choice now available. I still laugh at the sketches & the films. I have a weird sense of humour maybe that explains why I like it!

Lexx answered 4 years ago
off the wall humour that pushes the boundaries with out resorting to sex and profanity ( well most of the time)
They pushed the limits of comedy which now has become the norm – but MP lead the way for many comedians that are amazing
Long live the Python!!

Rebecca answered 4 years ago
Because it is ridiculous. You have 2 types of people, those that find it funny because it is silly and those who cannot get past the silly to see the humor.
For example the attack rabbit “what is he going to do, nibble my bum?”

Mae answered 4 years ago
That’s the reason it’s so funny, it’s just insanely ridiculous. That kind of funny that makes your stomach hurt you’re laughing so much.

itsjustme answered 4 years ago
It was the late 60’s early 70’s and they were pushing the edge back then,therefor it was very funny.This is a funny scene and a catchy tune too.

Sniper answered 4 years ago
I didn’t think people found it funny at all o_O

MrMunchy420 answered 4 years ago
Because its just brilliant in general.
Ridiculous does have a lot to do with it :P

Abolyss answered 4 years ago
that is exactly why.

Its so ridiculous its funny.
Huh? It is funny!! And it’s so random.

knownout answered 4 years ago
I don’t . Its just stupidity

The Script for the Introduction to This Podcast (Which I didn’t use – because it’s too similar to the opening of Monty Python Live at Drury Lane, and I don’t want to steal their jokes!)
Radio voice… Welcome ladies and gentlemen to this special Royal Gala edition of Luke’s English Podcast. You join us here at the Royal Albert Hall, where this podcast is being recorded with a star studded audience, including her Royal Highness The Queen.
Among the other members of this celebrity audience, we can see… err… what’s his name… umm, that guy with the glasses on TV… also in the audience this evening, um, that woman, you know, the one in the TV commercials about that thing… just arriving now, it’s… um, you know that famous guy who is always in the newspapers…
And the atmosphere here at the Albert hall, with a royal audience, is electric, as the audience finally takes their seats to witness the recording of this extra special episode on British comedy legends, Monty Python’s Flying Circus. Unfortunately, none of the original pythons are present this evening, for legal reasons, but their spirit is very much with us… unless someone has just farted… Yes I think that’s it actually. And the lights now dim in the auditorium as Mr Luke Thompson of Solihull, takes the stage to begin the recording of this Royal podcast episode.
Good evening (cheering)
And I would especially like to welcome Her Royal Highness, it is indeed a great pleasure to have you here this evening. How’s it going? Sorry, I can’t hear you… I SAID HOW’S IT GOING LIZ??? Oh sorry…
Anyway, we are here today in order to pay tribute to the work of the comedy group known as Monty Python’s Flying Circus. (disappointment)
You did know that didn’t you?
You didn’t?
Wait, don’t leave… it’s interesting, I promise!
Wait…
Your majesty!
Everybody, this is going to be a really good podcast! Wait!
(Voice over) and as everybody leaves the auditorium, Luke has no choice but to continue the recording for our benefit…

Monty Python Live at Drury Lane

MontyPythonPIC

190. World Cup 2014 (Part 4: Dad’s Memories of 1966)

In this episode I was planning to give you my ‘brief History of the World Cup’ but I abandoned that idea because I decided it was too boring! Instead I’ve decided to just play you a recorded conversation I had with my Dad about his experience at the 1966 World Cup in London. He saw the semi-final between England and Portugal, and lived in London during the swinging 60s. I asked him to tell me what it was like. I hope you find it interesting. Right-click here to download the episode.

You can still read the script to my history of the World Cup as it is written below.

Don’t forget to add your comments to the World Cup thread in my forum. Just click in the Discussion Forums link in the menu above.

Bye for now ;)

Luke

    Original ‘script’ below

Luke’s Brief History of the World Cup
We continue with part 4 of this series of World Cup podcasts by looking at a brief history of The World Cup. You may be fed up with the World Cup at this stage, and I completely understand. Some of you simply might not be into football, and you can’t escape from it at the moment, and you might be thinking – not you too Luke! You’ve been bitten by the World Cup zombies! Well, for those of you who feel that way, don’t worry, this is just a phase and it will pass very soon, I promise! Who knows, perhaps I can actually get you into football, just for a while. In any case, normal podcasting will resume soon, but for now I’m sticking to the World Cup.

World Cup Fever is still gripping Luke’s English Podcast, even though England are out after losing our first 2 games. It hurts, but never mind. I’m getting over it, and anyway there are plenty of nations who didn’t even get to the finals so I’m not going to complain about it too much. So, as I said, this episode is all about the highlights of World Cup history. You can read a transcript for pretty much everything that I am saying on my website. Just find the page for episode 190.

When I was 14 my Dad bought me a Panini sticker album for World Cup 90. I got all the stickers and all the additional pages. I read all of it again and again during the tournament and I loved reading about the history of international football. It was much more engaging than my history lessons at school, and it gave me a taste of life and culture in other countries. Now, as World Cup history is being made again every day, let’s look back at some of the highlights of the World Cup over the last 84 years. This is my World Cup history. It’s written using a combination of extracts from Wikipedia, my knowledge and memory (I attended The World Cup in Japan in 2002), and some contributions from my Dad, Rick Thompson, who I sometimes call Rickipedia (he attended the World Cup in England in 1966).

A Brief World Cup History (Written by Luke from Luke’s English Podcast, with help from Rickipedia and Wikipedia)

1930
The first World Cup took place in 1930 and was hosted by Uruguay. The first goal in World Cup history was scored by Lucien Laurent of France against Mexico. Four days later, the first World Cup hat-trick was achieved by Bert Patenaude of the USA in the Americans’ 3–0 win against Paraguay. Are you surprised that the USA took part in the original compeition? In the final, Uruguay defeated Argentina 4–2 in front of a crowd of 93,000 people in Montevideo, and became the first nation to win a World Cup.

1934
The 1934 World Cup was hosted by Italy, which caused some political disagreement. Uruguay, the titleholders from 1930 boycotted the 1934 World Cup because they were upset that so many European teams hadn’t attended their original world cup in 1930. Italy won the tournament, beating Czechoslovakia to become the first European team to win the tournament.

1938
The 1938 World Cup competition was also held in Europe, much to the consternation of many South Americans, with Uruguay and Argentina both boycotting. France hosted, but for the first time the hosts did not win the competition, as Italy retained their title, beating Hungary in the final by four goals to two.

1938-1950
Up until about 1950 the World Cup was beset by political disagreements and boycotts. During the 40s The World Cup was overshadowed by a larger, much more serious and massively more aggressive contest. Yes, that’s right, World War 2 kicked off in 1939, which kind of interrupted things slightly. It’s hard to organise an international football tournament when the nations of the world are busy using all their time, money and resources on blowing each other up. So, the 1942 and 1946 games were cancelled.

1950
Competition resumed with the 1950 World Cup in Brazil, which was the first to include British participants. Yey! However, in characteristic fashion the English failed to qualify for the final group round in a campaign that included a 1–0 loss to the United States. Very humiliating! Eastern European countries (such as Hungary, the Soviet Union, and Czechoslovakia) did not enter the tournament. Title-holder Italy did take part, despite the Superga air disaster of 1949 in which the entire Grande Torino team (many who were national team players) were killed. Uruguay were surprise victors over hosts Brazil (in a match which would later be known as Maracanazo) and became champions for the second time. Well done Uruguay. Perhaps you can do it again this year, although you shouldn’t get too pleased with yourself after beating England. Everyone seems to be able to do that nowadays (and one of those goals shouldn’t have been allowed because Suarez was offside, but never mind that now!)

1954
The 1954 World Cup, held in Switzerland, was the first to be televised. The Soviet Union did not participate because of their dismal performance at the 1952 Summer Olympics. It’s not clear why they didn’t join in. Were they just embarrassed? Scotland made their first appearance in the tournament, but were unable to register a win, going out after the group stage. West Germany were the tournament winners, defeating Olympic champions Hungary 3–2 in the final, coming back from being 2-0 down to Hungary. The match is known as the Miracle of Bern in Germany.

1958
Brazil won the 1958 World Cup, held in Sweden, and became the first team to win a World Cup outside their home continent. Only 3 teams have done this to date – Brazil in 1958 (Sweden), 1970 (Mexico), 1994 (USA) and 2002 (JPN/Korea), Argentina in 1986 (Mexico), and Spain in 2010 (South Africa). The Soviet Union participated this time, most likely due to their win at the Melbourne Olympics in 1956. For the first (and so far only) time, all four British teams qualified for the second round. The tournament also saw the emergence of Pelé, who scored two goals in the final. French striker Just Fontaine became the top scorer of the tournament with a still standing record of 13 goals.

1962
Chile hosted the 1962 World Cup. Before play began, an earthquake struck, the largest ever recorded at 9.5 magnitude, prompting officials to rebuild stadiums due to major damage to infrastructure. When the competition began, two of the best players were in poor form as Pelé was injured in Brazil’s second group match vs Czechoslovakia, and USSR saw their goalkeeper Lev Yashin show poor form including a 2–1 loss to hosts Chile as that team, inspired by team spirit captured third place. The competition was also marred by overly defensive and often violent tactics. This poisonous atmosphere culminated in what was known as the Battle of Santiago first round match between Italy and Chile in which Chile won 2–0. Prior to the match, two Italian journalists had written critical articles about the host country. In the match, players on both sides made deliberate attempts to harm (injure) opponents though only two players from Italy were sent off. In the end, the Italian team needed police protection to leave the field in safety. When the final whistle blew, Brazil beat Czechoslovakia for the second World Cup in a row by a final score of 3–1 led by Garrincha and Amarildo, in Pelé’s absence, and retained the Jules Rimet trophy. In this tournament, Colombia’s Marcos Coll made World Cup history when he scored a goal direct from a corner kick (called an Olympic Goal in Latin America) the only one ever made in a World Cup. Not only that, it was also against the legendary goal keeper Lev Yashin, from the Soviet Union.

1966
The 1966 World Cup, hosted by England (UK), was the first to embrace marketing, featuring a mascot and official logo for the first time. The trophy was stolen in the run-up to the tournament but was found a week later by a dog named “Pickles”. North Korea, became the first Asian team to reach the quarter-finals, eliminating Italy in the process. England won the tournament, and Geoff Hurst became the first and to this day the only player to score a hat-trick in a World Cup Final. Eusébio, whose team Portugal were taking part in their first World Cup, was the tournament top-scorer, with 9 goals to his name. *Controversial goal. *Did the ball cross the line (no) *Joy for England in a pretty special year/decade for the country. *Interview with Rick Thompson.

1970
In 1970, The finals were held in Mexico. The group stage clash between defending champions England and Brazil lived up to its billing, and is still remembered for England goalkeeper Gordon Banks’ save from a Pelé header on the six-yard line, arguably the best save ever. Gordon Banks is considered the 2nd best goalkeeper in the world, after Lev Yashin of Soviet Union and before Dino Zoff of Italy. What happened was, England were playing Brazil, with their legendary 1970 team including Pele. Jairzinho crossed the ball from just inside the penalty box, the ball sailed over to the far post where Pele leapt high into the air, beating his defender to head the ball down towards what looked like an open goal. Gordon Banks had been covering the near post and the ball had gone over his head. Pele headed the ball hard and fast downwards towards the open space near the far post. It looked like a definite goal, but somehow Gordon Banks managed to leap over and turn the ball around the post. What made it particularly impressive was that the ball had bounced and was moving upwards from the ground and into the goal. Banks was diving and falling and the ball was bouncing upwards. When he stopped it, the ball was at about chest height. It was a perfectly timed and very athletic save, and is considered by many to be the best save ever.

The tournament is also remembered for the semi-final match between Italy and West Germany, in which 5 goals were scored in extra time, and Franz Beckenbauer played with a broken arm, since Germany had used up all their allowed substitutions. Italy were the eventual 4–3 winners, but were defeated 1–4 in the final by Brazil, who became the first nation to win three World Cups, and were awarded the Jules Rimet trophy permanently for their achievement. This was a legendary Brazilian squad, including players like Pele, captain Carlos Alberto Torres, Jairzinho, Tostão, Gérson and Rivelino. For me this was when the World Cup entered a new era, with superstar players, in colour, with television in many people’s homes.

1974
A new trophy was created for the 1974 World Cup, held in West Germany. Some people make jokes about its appearance. I’ll let you imagine what those jokes are.
The West German hosts won the competition by beating the Netherlands 2–1 in the final, but it was also the revolutionary Total Football system of the Dutch that captured the footballing world’s imagination. Johan Cruyff was one of the stars of this competition, showing off close ball control and dribbling skills, including the legendary “Cruyff Turn”. This is a kind of ‘dummy’ which he used to great effect on the wing. He’d make it look like he was going to kick the ball but then at the last moment he’d use his foot to drag the ball between his legs, then turn and beat his defender before running towards the goal line and crossing at close range. In football, it’s important to “get round the back” which means get around the defensive line by dribbling or passing the ball around the side, and then passing it into the penalty area from a ‘deep’ position. The Cruyff turn was quite a revolution in terms of close ball control. Nowadays it’s really common to use a variety of tricks in order to beat defenders and get through a team’s defensive line. The very well-playing Poland finished third, after defeating Brazil 1–0 (and after defeating Argentina 3–2 and eliminating Italy 2–1 in the initial group play). They ultimately lost 0-1 in terrible rain in the semifinals to West Germany.

1978
The 1978 World Cup was held in Argentina, causing controversy as a military coup had taken place in the country two years earlier. Tunisia won their first match against Mexico 3–1 and became the first African team to ever win a world cup game. There was some on-field controversy as well. During the second round Argentina had an advantage in their match against Peru since the kick off was several hours after Brazil’s match with Poland. Brazil won their match 3–1, so Argentina knew that they had to beat Peru by four goals to advance to the final. Trailing 2–0 at half-time, Peru simply collapsed in the second half, and Argentina eventually won 6–0. Rumors suggested that Peru might have been bribed into allowing Argentina to win the match by such a large margin. Argentina went on to win the final 3–1, Mario Kempes scoring twice, with the Dutch being runners-up for the second time running. Obviously it was a great result for Argentina. The Netherlands still haven’t won the World Cup, despite being one of the great footballing nations of our time.

I was a one-year old baby during this competition, and I wasn’t really developed enough to appreciate either the complexities of dutch footballing strategy or the finer aspects of the socio-political context of World Cup 78. I was more interested in throwing food on the floor and falling asleep. I still am quite interested in those things to be honest, but never mind that now.

1982
Spain hosted an expanded 1982 World Cup which featured 24 teams. The group match between Kuwait and France was stage of a farcical incident. As the French were leading 3–1, the Kuwaiti team stopped playing after hearing a whistle from the stands which they thought had come from the referee, and French defender Maxime Bossis scored while the Kuwaiti team were not playing. As the Kuwaiti team were protesting the goal, Sheikh Fahid Al-Ahmad Al-Sabah, president of the Kuwaiti Football Association, rushed onto the pitch and gave the referee a piece of his mind, who proceeded to disallow the goal. Despite this diplomatic intervention by the Kuwaiti football president, France scored another valid goal a few minutes later and France ultimately won the game 4–1. Also during the group stages Hungary beat El Salvador 10–1, which has been the only occasion to this day that a team has scored 10 goals in a World Cup match. The final was won by Italy (against West Germany), making Italian captain Dino Zoff the oldest player to win the World Cup at 40 years old. You might be thinking, well if Italy win this, will Andrea Pirlo beat that record. Well, no he won’t, because he just looks older than 40. He is in fact, just 35. Italian striker Paolo Rossi, who was making his comeback after a match-fixing scandal and the ensuing ban, was the tournament top-scorer with six goals including a classic hat-trick against Brazil.

1986
Mexico hosted it again. José Batista of Uruguay set a World Cup record after being sent off after just 56 seconds into the game against Scotland. The quarter final match between England and Argentina is remembered for two remarkable Diego Maradona goals, later regarded as player of the tournament. The first was the controversial handball goal, and the second was considered to be the Goal of the Century, in which he dribbled half the length of the field past five English players before casually tapping the ball into the back of the net. It was incredibly cheeky and skilful, as if to say, “I may have scored the previous goal with my hand, but you can’t deny that that one was the probably the best goal you’ve ever seen”. In the final, Argentina beat West Germany 3–2, inspired by Diego Maradona, who was their captain. I watched the quarter final on TV with my family. I was 9 years old.

1990
The 1990 World Cup was held in Italy. Cameroon participating in their second World Cup, made it to the quarter finals after beating Argentina in the opening game. Roger Milla was quite a big personality in the Cameroon team, and they developed a funny dance which they did every time they scored (which was quite a lot). They ran to the corner flag and did a kind of sexy dance. That’s the first time I remember seeing celebrational dancing after scoring a goal. No African country had ever reached the quarter finals before. An unpleasant episode marred the South American qualifying games: during the match between Brazil and Chile, a firework landed close to the Chilean goalkeeper Rojas, who then pretended to be injured. In fact he had cut his own face with a razor blade which he had hidden in his glove. The plan was to have the game cancelled, or to have Brazil eliminated from the tournament as the flare had come from the Brazilian stands. His team refused to continue the match (as they were down a goal at the time). The plot was discovered and resulted in a 12-year suspension for Rojas and Chile were banned from the World Cup in 1994. The final featured the same teams as in 1986. After finishing runners-up in the two previous tournaments, West Germany beat Argentina 1–0 in the final to record their third title. It was a pretty special result for the Germans, with the context of the fall of the Berlin wall a year before. The Republic of Ireland also made their first appearance in the tournament, reaching the quarter-finals without winning a single game (4 draws, with a penalty shoot-out win over Romania in the second round). This is the furthest a team has ever advanced in the World Cup without winning a game. The luck of the Irish?
During this World Cup I was 13/14 years old and obsessed by football. I watched the tournament on TV and I had the fully completed Panini sticker album which my Dad bought for me. I loved that England team, and we nearly got to the final! We got knocked out by Germany in a nail-biting semi-final which we ultimately lost on penalties (the first of our terrible run of penalty-based defeats). I remember the excitement of when Linaker scored our goal against the Germans. The whole family jumped out of our seats screaming. The cat was terrified and ran out of the room. That’s the closest we’ve got to the World Cup final for a long time.

1994
The 1994 World Cup, held in the USA, saw the first World Cup final to be decided on penalties, with Brazil edging out Italy and Roberto Baggio famously failing to score his penalty. Unfortunately Yugoslavia was excluded due to UN sanctions in connection with the war in Bosnia-Herzegovina. Russia (taking the place of USSR which had disintegrated over 1990 and 1991) played their first World Cup competition as a new country, with Greece, Nigeria and Saudi Arabia as the other first-timers. Along with disgrace – Diego Maradona being banned mid-tournament after testing positive for recreational drugs (cocaine). It’s not clear if he was actually on cocaine during the games, but he certainly looked like he was off his head! Without him, Argentina were eliminated in the last 16 by Romania — the tournament also saw tragedy when Colombian defender Andrés Escobar was murdered 10 days after his own-goal against the hosts in their first round match that eliminated Colombia. Apparently, gangsters had threatened the players before the game. So, not only did Escobar have the shame of scoring an own goal, but he may also have known at that point that he would pay the ultimate price for it. Oleg Salenko of Russia became the first player to score five goals in a single World Cup game in his country’s 6–1 win over Cameroon. In the same match, 42-year old Roger Milla scored the only goal for Cameroon, becoming the oldest player ever to score in a World Cup match. England didn’t qualify for this competition, but I watched a lot of the games anyway, although I was less interested in football than I had been 4 years earlier . My interests were more focused on music and girls and that sort of thing. I was 17 and one of my friends had a free house during the final week of the tournament. We all hung out there in a big gang and watched a lot of games together. Fun times.

1998
The 1998 World Cup was held in France. Iran beat the Maldives in qualification by the widest margin in World Cup history: 17–0. Hosts France won the tournament by beating Brazil 3–0 in the final. What a great moment for the French! There was a lot of hype around the Brazilian squad going into the competition, especially around the star player Ronaldo. As the scorer of four goals in the tournament, Ronaldo appeared to be less than a hundred percent in the match, and was unable to make any impact. Some say that he shouldn’t have started the game as he wasn’t fit or healthy enough. I’ve heard suggestions that as team sponsors, Nike put pressure on the team to play Ronaldo, as he was so important for their brand image. Certainly there was a sense that the World Cup had become way too commercialised and more about money making than the true values of the World Cup. Debutants Croatia finished a commendable third. I watched many of the key games at home, on my own :( This is when I was on summer holiday from university, living at my parents house, in the middle of nowhere. We lived in the countryside and I didn’t have a car, so I had to try and persuade my mates to come and collect me so I could watch games with them. A lot of the time I was just stranded on my own, shouting at the TV. I was 21. England were knocked out by Argentina in the 2nd round. Yes, on penalties.

2002
The 2002 World Cup was the first to be held in Asia, and was hosted jointly by South Korea and Japan. Australia defeated American Samoa 31–0 in a preliminary match – a new record for the margin of victory, and the highest-scoring match ever in World Cup history. 31-0??? Australia should have saved some of those goals. The could have used them last week. The tournament was a successful one for teams traditionally regarded as minnows (small fish), with South Korea, Senegal and USA all reaching the last eight. Brazil beat Germany 2–0 in the final for their fifth title. I was in Japan during this competition. I was 25 years old. England were knocked out by Brazil in the 2nd round, not on penalties, but it still hurt. I watched one of the games in Saitama stadium. It was England vs Norway. Most of the crowd were England fans. Japanese England fans. The Japanese loved England, but I think that was mainly because of David Beckham.

2006
The 2006 World Cup was held in Germany. Brazil and England were initially the English bookmakers’ favourites. A strong performance by Germany brought them as far as the semifinals. However, the final match-up was between Italy and France, in which French captain Zinedine Zidane was sent off in the last 10 minutes of extra time for a headbutt to the chest of Italian central defender Marco Materazzi. Apparently Materazzi was whispering some insults into Zidane’s ear, and Zidane just lost it. The headbutt was pretty shocking, but it was also one of the most impressive moments in the game! POW! A headbutt direct to the chest and Materazzi hit the deck! Really, it’s a pity that this happened, because Zidane is one of the best players we’ve had in the world, and this really tainted his image. He’s be celebrated more if it wasn’t for that. Italy went on to win 5–3 in a penalty shootout, the score having been 1–1 after 90 minutes and extra time. I watched this game in my flat in London, joined at half time by a Polish friend called Marek who brought beer, and who might be listening to this. Hello Marek. I was 29 years old.

2010
The 2010 World Cup was held in South Africa. It was the first cup hosted in African, and the cup was won by Spain. The tournament was noted for its highly defensive opening matches, controversies surrounding goal-line technology, and the introduction of vuvuzelas, which some people believe destroyed the atmosphere at many of the games. The noise was pretty annoying. [Play vuvuzela sound] It sounds like a swarm of angry bees or something. The main problem was that it was just a constant droning sound. There was no difference between a goal and normal play. Just a constant AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA sound. Though considered as one of the tournament favourites, the Spaniards won the cup despite scoring only 8 goals in 7 games and losing their opening match to Switzerland. In a final which saw a record number of yellow cards distributed and what some considered violent play from the Dutch side, the 10-man Netherlands squad were defeated 1–0 in the 116th minute of extra time by an Andrés Iniesta goal. Maybe the Dutch defeat of Spain last week was a bit of revenge. I watched a lot of this in London with my girlfriend. I was 33. England were pretty rubbish. We seemed to have no team spirit at all. The players didn’t gel, and Rooney was a disappointment. We got smashed by an amazing German team 5-1. Frank Lampard had a goal disallowed by the referee, although it did cross the line. Perhaps this was justice for the non-goal which was allowed back in the 1966 final when England beat West Germany. England were knocked out of the tournament. But I’m still with my girlfriend!

That brings us up to the current world cup, which is of course being held in Brazil. The next one is due to be held in Russia in 2018, and then in Qatar in 2022. Hopefully, I will still be recording Luke’s English Podcast, and I will still be with my girlfriend, who at that point will have become my wife!

So that’s the end of my World Cup History. As usual, leave me your comments. I’ve opened another comments thread in the discussion forum. Write comments there and I will read them out on the podcast when I get the chance.

Bye for now,
Luke