Category Archives: Social English

203. A Cup of Tea with Peter Sidell (The Flatmate from Japan)

English teacher, travel writer, stand-up comic, learner of Japanese, DJ, native English speaker, Machester City fan and former flatmate of Luke from Luke’s English Podcast – Peter Sidell is a guy who keeps himself busy!

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I lived with Peter in Tsujidou, Japan for nearly a year. I left at the end of 2003 and he stayed there and I hadn’t seen him for about 11 years until he recently visited Paris and we got the chance to catch up with each other again. Of course I jumped at the chance to interview Peter for LEP, and you can now listen to our conversation here, now.

www.japantravel.com
Peter is a regular contributor to www.japantravel.com where you can read articles and travel advice for Japan. Are you thinking of going to Japan, or would you like to read some interesting articles about Japan in English? Just click www.japantravel.com to find out more. To see a list of articles written by Peter, click here.

During our chat you’ll hear us talking about such things as:
– Peter’s tourist activities in Paris (visiting galleries and looking at ‘crazy modern art’, drinking wine at lunchtime, attempting to deal with waiters)
– The day we first met each other in a McDonalds in 2003
– Living as an ex-pat in Japan
– Where Peter is from, and his accent
– Learning Japanese
– Cultural differences between the UK and Japan
– How it feels to go back to England after living in Japan for years
– Japantravel.com
– Destinations Peter has travelled to
– Doing stand-up in Japan
– How it feels to experience earthquakes in Japan
– The beauty of Mt Fuji seen from Hayama beach
– Luis Suarez

Thanks for listening :)10589716_10152725560062494_74912480_n
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199. The UK/USA Quiz

Molly and I ask each other general knowledge questions about the USA and the UK. How much do we know about each other’s countries? How much do you know about the USA and the UK? Can you answer the questions too? Listen and find out! Right-click here to download.

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This is the continuation of the conversation I started with Molly in episode 198. In our quiz we ask each other questions about the history, geography, politics and even accents & dialects of the USA & UK.

If you fancy writing part of the transcript for this episode, click here to visit the google document.

That’s it for now! I’ve nearly reached 200 episodes of LEP. We should have some kind of celebration, shouldn’t we?

All the best,
Luke
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198. A Cup of Tea with Molly Martinez

My friend Molly joins me for a cup of Japanese green tea and a bit of a chat. Molly is a graduate of journalism and is a very funny comedian and writer. First of all you’ll hear me interviewing Molly about her life, her American/Mexican roots and her plans for the future, and then Molly interviews me with some random yet revealing questions.

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If you fancy transcribing this episode of the podcast, click here to visit the google document for this episode.

I hope you enjoy the episode!
All the best,
Luke
genmai-cha-brewed
Cup of tea image from this blog: http://eastxmidwest.wordpress.com

196. Cycling from Coast to Coast

Almost exactly one year ago, Ben Fisher was on the podcast telling us about his cycling trip from London to Paris. Now he’s back to tell us about his latest cycling adventure. Last time he cycled a total of 484.7km. This time he more than doubled that distance cycling 1223.42km from the north coast of France all the way down to the south coast. It was a much longer and more difficult trip and he’s here on the podcast to tell us all about it! Right-click here to download this episode.

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Click here to revisit 136. Cycling from London to Paris. (Have I really uploaded 60 episodes in the last 12 months? Wow.)

Click here to visit Ben’s blog where you can read all about this cycling trip, look at photos and read all the stats about his journey. http://drainbamms.wordpress.com

Follow Ben on Twitter @DrainBamms: https://twitter.com/drainbamms

Click here to visit WarmShowers.org. That’s the website for cyclists who would like to share accommodation with each other. www.warmshowers.org

If you’d like to contribute a transcript for this, click here to access a google doc for 196 Cycling from Coast to Coast.

Picture (c) Kate Fisher (Ben’s sister) – Check out her great illustrations at www.damefishy.com
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190. World Cup 2014 (Part 4: Dad’s Memories of 1966)

In this episode I was planning to give you my ‘brief History of the World Cup’ but I abandoned that idea because I decided it was too boring! Instead I’ve decided to just play you a recorded conversation I had with my Dad about his experience at the 1966 World Cup in London. He saw the semi-final between England and Portugal, and lived in London during the swinging 60s. I asked him to tell me what it was like. I hope you find it interesting. Right-click here to download the episode.

You can still read the script to my history of the World Cup as it is written below.

Don’t forget to add your comments to the World Cup thread in my forum. Just click in the Discussion Forums link in the menu above.

Bye for now ;)

Luke

    Original ‘script’ below

Luke’s Brief History of the World Cup
We continue with part 4 of this series of World Cup podcasts by looking at a brief history of The World Cup. You may be fed up with the World Cup at this stage, and I completely understand. Some of you simply might not be into football, and you can’t escape from it at the moment, and you might be thinking – not you too Luke! You’ve been bitten by the World Cup zombies! Well, for those of you who feel that way, don’t worry, this is just a phase and it will pass very soon, I promise! Who knows, perhaps I can actually get you into football, just for a while. In any case, normal podcasting will resume soon, but for now I’m sticking to the World Cup.

World Cup Fever is still gripping Luke’s English Podcast, even though England are out after losing our first 2 games. It hurts, but never mind. I’m getting over it, and anyway there are plenty of nations who didn’t even get to the finals so I’m not going to complain about it too much. So, as I said, this episode is all about the highlights of World Cup history. You can read a transcript for pretty much everything that I am saying on my website. Just find the page for episode 190.

When I was 14 my Dad bought me a Panini sticker album for World Cup 90. I got all the stickers and all the additional pages. I read all of it again and again during the tournament and I loved reading about the history of international football. It was much more engaging than my history lessons at school, and it gave me a taste of life and culture in other countries. Now, as World Cup history is being made again every day, let’s look back at some of the highlights of the World Cup over the last 84 years. This is my World Cup history. It’s written using a combination of extracts from Wikipedia, my knowledge and memory (I attended The World Cup in Japan in 2002), and some contributions from my Dad, Rick Thompson, who I sometimes call Rickipedia (he attended the World Cup in England in 1966).

A Brief World Cup History (Written by Luke from Luke’s English Podcast, with help from Rickipedia and Wikipedia)

1930
The first World Cup took place in 1930 and was hosted by Uruguay. The first goal in World Cup history was scored by Lucien Laurent of France against Mexico. Four days later, the first World Cup hat-trick was achieved by Bert Patenaude of the USA in the Americans’ 3–0 win against Paraguay. Are you surprised that the USA took part in the original compeition? In the final, Uruguay defeated Argentina 4–2 in front of a crowd of 93,000 people in Montevideo, and became the first nation to win a World Cup.

1934
The 1934 World Cup was hosted by Italy, which caused some political disagreement. Uruguay, the titleholders from 1930 boycotted the 1934 World Cup because they were upset that so many European teams hadn’t attended their original world cup in 1930. Italy won the tournament, beating Czechoslovakia to become the first European team to win the tournament.

1938
The 1938 World Cup competition was also held in Europe, much to the consternation of many South Americans, with Uruguay and Argentina both boycotting. France hosted, but for the first time the hosts did not win the competition, as Italy retained their title, beating Hungary in the final by four goals to two.

1938-1950
Up until about 1950 the World Cup was beset by political disagreements and boycotts. During the 40s The World Cup was overshadowed by a larger, much more serious and massively more aggressive contest. Yes, that’s right, World War 2 kicked off in 1939, which kind of interrupted things slightly. It’s hard to organise an international football tournament when the nations of the world are busy using all their time, money and resources on blowing each other up. So, the 1942 and 1946 games were cancelled.

1950
Competition resumed with the 1950 World Cup in Brazil, which was the first to include British participants. Yey! However, in characteristic fashion the English failed to qualify for the final group round in a campaign that included a 1–0 loss to the United States. Very humiliating! Eastern European countries (such as Hungary, the Soviet Union, and Czechoslovakia) did not enter the tournament. Title-holder Italy did take part, despite the Superga air disaster of 1949 in which the entire Grande Torino team (many who were national team players) were killed. Uruguay were surprise victors over hosts Brazil (in a match which would later be known as Maracanazo) and became champions for the second time. Well done Uruguay. Perhaps you can do it again this year, although you shouldn’t get too pleased with yourself after beating England. Everyone seems to be able to do that nowadays (and one of those goals shouldn’t have been allowed because Suarez was offside, but never mind that now!)

1954
The 1954 World Cup, held in Switzerland, was the first to be televised. The Soviet Union did not participate because of their dismal performance at the 1952 Summer Olympics. It’s not clear why they didn’t join in. Were they just embarrassed? Scotland made their first appearance in the tournament, but were unable to register a win, going out after the group stage. West Germany were the tournament winners, defeating Olympic champions Hungary 3–2 in the final, coming back from being 2-0 down to Hungary. The match is known as the Miracle of Bern in Germany.

1958
Brazil won the 1958 World Cup, held in Sweden, and became the first team to win a World Cup outside their home continent. Only 3 teams have done this to date – Brazil in 1958 (Sweden), 1970 (Mexico), 1994 (USA) and 2002 (JPN/Korea), Argentina in 1986 (Mexico), and Spain in 2010 (South Africa). The Soviet Union participated this time, most likely due to their win at the Melbourne Olympics in 1956. For the first (and so far only) time, all four British teams qualified for the second round. The tournament also saw the emergence of Pelé, who scored two goals in the final. French striker Just Fontaine became the top scorer of the tournament with a still standing record of 13 goals.

1962
Chile hosted the 1962 World Cup. Before play began, an earthquake struck, the largest ever recorded at 9.5 magnitude, prompting officials to rebuild stadiums due to major damage to infrastructure. When the competition began, two of the best players were in poor form as Pelé was injured in Brazil’s second group match vs Czechoslovakia, and USSR saw their goalkeeper Lev Yashin show poor form including a 2–1 loss to hosts Chile as that team, inspired by team spirit captured third place. The competition was also marred by overly defensive and often violent tactics. This poisonous atmosphere culminated in what was known as the Battle of Santiago first round match between Italy and Chile in which Chile won 2–0. Prior to the match, two Italian journalists had written critical articles about the host country. In the match, players on both sides made deliberate attempts to harm (injure) opponents though only two players from Italy were sent off. In the end, the Italian team needed police protection to leave the field in safety. When the final whistle blew, Brazil beat Czechoslovakia for the second World Cup in a row by a final score of 3–1 led by Garrincha and Amarildo, in Pelé’s absence, and retained the Jules Rimet trophy. In this tournament, Colombia’s Marcos Coll made World Cup history when he scored a goal direct from a corner kick (called an Olympic Goal in Latin America) the only one ever made in a World Cup. Not only that, it was also against the legendary goal keeper Lev Yashin, from the Soviet Union.

1966
The 1966 World Cup, hosted by England (UK), was the first to embrace marketing, featuring a mascot and official logo for the first time. The trophy was stolen in the run-up to the tournament but was found a week later by a dog named “Pickles”. North Korea, became the first Asian team to reach the quarter-finals, eliminating Italy in the process. England won the tournament, and Geoff Hurst became the first and to this day the only player to score a hat-trick in a World Cup Final. Eusébio, whose team Portugal were taking part in their first World Cup, was the tournament top-scorer, with 9 goals to his name. *Controversial goal. *Did the ball cross the line (no) *Joy for England in a pretty special year/decade for the country. *Interview with Rick Thompson.

1970
In 1970, The finals were held in Mexico. The group stage clash between defending champions England and Brazil lived up to its billing, and is still remembered for England goalkeeper Gordon Banks’ save from a Pelé header on the six-yard line, arguably the best save ever. Gordon Banks is considered the 2nd best goalkeeper in the world, after Lev Yashin of Soviet Union and before Dino Zoff of Italy. What happened was, England were playing Brazil, with their legendary 1970 team including Pele. Jairzinho crossed the ball from just inside the penalty box, the ball sailed over to the far post where Pele leapt high into the air, beating his defender to head the ball down towards what looked like an open goal. Gordon Banks had been covering the near post and the ball had gone over his head. Pele headed the ball hard and fast downwards towards the open space near the far post. It looked like a definite goal, but somehow Gordon Banks managed to leap over and turn the ball around the post. What made it particularly impressive was that the ball had bounced and was moving upwards from the ground and into the goal. Banks was diving and falling and the ball was bouncing upwards. When he stopped it, the ball was at about chest height. It was a perfectly timed and very athletic save, and is considered by many to be the best save ever.

The tournament is also remembered for the semi-final match between Italy and West Germany, in which 5 goals were scored in extra time, and Franz Beckenbauer played with a broken arm, since Germany had used up all their allowed substitutions. Italy were the eventual 4–3 winners, but were defeated 1–4 in the final by Brazil, who became the first nation to win three World Cups, and were awarded the Jules Rimet trophy permanently for their achievement. This was a legendary Brazilian squad, including players like Pele, captain Carlos Alberto Torres, Jairzinho, Tostão, Gérson and Rivelino. For me this was when the World Cup entered a new era, with superstar players, in colour, with television in many people’s homes.

1974
A new trophy was created for the 1974 World Cup, held in West Germany. Some people make jokes about its appearance. I’ll let you imagine what those jokes are.
The West German hosts won the competition by beating the Netherlands 2–1 in the final, but it was also the revolutionary Total Football system of the Dutch that captured the footballing world’s imagination. Johan Cruyff was one of the stars of this competition, showing off close ball control and dribbling skills, including the legendary “Cruyff Turn”. This is a kind of ‘dummy’ which he used to great effect on the wing. He’d make it look like he was going to kick the ball but then at the last moment he’d use his foot to drag the ball between his legs, then turn and beat his defender before running towards the goal line and crossing at close range. In football, it’s important to “get round the back” which means get around the defensive line by dribbling or passing the ball around the side, and then passing it into the penalty area from a ‘deep’ position. The Cruyff turn was quite a revolution in terms of close ball control. Nowadays it’s really common to use a variety of tricks in order to beat defenders and get through a team’s defensive line. The very well-playing Poland finished third, after defeating Brazil 1–0 (and after defeating Argentina 3–2 and eliminating Italy 2–1 in the initial group play). They ultimately lost 0-1 in terrible rain in the semifinals to West Germany.

1978
The 1978 World Cup was held in Argentina, causing controversy as a military coup had taken place in the country two years earlier. Tunisia won their first match against Mexico 3–1 and became the first African team to ever win a world cup game. There was some on-field controversy as well. During the second round Argentina had an advantage in their match against Peru since the kick off was several hours after Brazil’s match with Poland. Brazil won their match 3–1, so Argentina knew that they had to beat Peru by four goals to advance to the final. Trailing 2–0 at half-time, Peru simply collapsed in the second half, and Argentina eventually won 6–0. Rumors suggested that Peru might have been bribed into allowing Argentina to win the match by such a large margin. Argentina went on to win the final 3–1, Mario Kempes scoring twice, with the Dutch being runners-up for the second time running. Obviously it was a great result for Argentina. The Netherlands still haven’t won the World Cup, despite being one of the great footballing nations of our time.

I was a one-year old baby during this competition, and I wasn’t really developed enough to appreciate either the complexities of dutch footballing strategy or the finer aspects of the socio-political context of World Cup 78. I was more interested in throwing food on the floor and falling asleep. I still am quite interested in those things to be honest, but never mind that now.

1982
Spain hosted an expanded 1982 World Cup which featured 24 teams. The group match between Kuwait and France was stage of a farcical incident. As the French were leading 3–1, the Kuwaiti team stopped playing after hearing a whistle from the stands which they thought had come from the referee, and French defender Maxime Bossis scored while the Kuwaiti team were not playing. As the Kuwaiti team were protesting the goal, Sheikh Fahid Al-Ahmad Al-Sabah, president of the Kuwaiti Football Association, rushed onto the pitch and gave the referee a piece of his mind, who proceeded to disallow the goal. Despite this diplomatic intervention by the Kuwaiti football president, France scored another valid goal a few minutes later and France ultimately won the game 4–1. Also during the group stages Hungary beat El Salvador 10–1, which has been the only occasion to this day that a team has scored 10 goals in a World Cup match. The final was won by Italy (against West Germany), making Italian captain Dino Zoff the oldest player to win the World Cup at 40 years old. You might be thinking, well if Italy win this, will Andrea Pirlo beat that record. Well, no he won’t, because he just looks older than 40. He is in fact, just 35. Italian striker Paolo Rossi, who was making his comeback after a match-fixing scandal and the ensuing ban, was the tournament top-scorer with six goals including a classic hat-trick against Brazil.

1986
Mexico hosted it again. José Batista of Uruguay set a World Cup record after being sent off after just 56 seconds into the game against Scotland. The quarter final match between England and Argentina is remembered for two remarkable Diego Maradona goals, later regarded as player of the tournament. The first was the controversial handball goal, and the second was considered to be the Goal of the Century, in which he dribbled half the length of the field past five English players before casually tapping the ball into the back of the net. It was incredibly cheeky and skilful, as if to say, “I may have scored the previous goal with my hand, but you can’t deny that that one was the probably the best goal you’ve ever seen”. In the final, Argentina beat West Germany 3–2, inspired by Diego Maradona, who was their captain. I watched the quarter final on TV with my family. I was 9 years old.

1990
The 1990 World Cup was held in Italy. Cameroon participating in their second World Cup, made it to the quarter finals after beating Argentina in the opening game. Roger Milla was quite a big personality in the Cameroon team, and they developed a funny dance which they did every time they scored (which was quite a lot). They ran to the corner flag and did a kind of sexy dance. That’s the first time I remember seeing celebrational dancing after scoring a goal. No African country had ever reached the quarter finals before. An unpleasant episode marred the South American qualifying games: during the match between Brazil and Chile, a firework landed close to the Chilean goalkeeper Rojas, who then pretended to be injured. In fact he had cut his own face with a razor blade which he had hidden in his glove. The plan was to have the game cancelled, or to have Brazil eliminated from the tournament as the flare had come from the Brazilian stands. His team refused to continue the match (as they were down a goal at the time). The plot was discovered and resulted in a 12-year suspension for Rojas and Chile were banned from the World Cup in 1994. The final featured the same teams as in 1986. After finishing runners-up in the two previous tournaments, West Germany beat Argentina 1–0 in the final to record their third title. It was a pretty special result for the Germans, with the context of the fall of the Berlin wall a year before. The Republic of Ireland also made their first appearance in the tournament, reaching the quarter-finals without winning a single game (4 draws, with a penalty shoot-out win over Romania in the second round). This is the furthest a team has ever advanced in the World Cup without winning a game. The luck of the Irish?
During this World Cup I was 13/14 years old and obsessed by football. I watched the tournament on TV and I had the fully completed Panini sticker album which my Dad bought for me. I loved that England team, and we nearly got to the final! We got knocked out by Germany in a nail-biting semi-final which we ultimately lost on penalties (the first of our terrible run of penalty-based defeats). I remember the excitement of when Linaker scored our goal against the Germans. The whole family jumped out of our seats screaming. The cat was terrified and ran out of the room. That’s the closest we’ve got to the World Cup final for a long time.

1994
The 1994 World Cup, held in the USA, saw the first World Cup final to be decided on penalties, with Brazil edging out Italy and Roberto Baggio famously failing to score his penalty. Unfortunately Yugoslavia was excluded due to UN sanctions in connection with the war in Bosnia-Herzegovina. Russia (taking the place of USSR which had disintegrated over 1990 and 1991) played their first World Cup competition as a new country, with Greece, Nigeria and Saudi Arabia as the other first-timers. Along with disgrace – Diego Maradona being banned mid-tournament after testing positive for recreational drugs (cocaine). It’s not clear if he was actually on cocaine during the games, but he certainly looked like he was off his head! Without him, Argentina were eliminated in the last 16 by Romania — the tournament also saw tragedy when Colombian defender Andrés Escobar was murdered 10 days after his own-goal against the hosts in their first round match that eliminated Colombia. Apparently, gangsters had threatened the players before the game. So, not only did Escobar have the shame of scoring an own goal, but he may also have known at that point that he would pay the ultimate price for it. Oleg Salenko of Russia became the first player to score five goals in a single World Cup game in his country’s 6–1 win over Cameroon. In the same match, 42-year old Roger Milla scored the only goal for Cameroon, becoming the oldest player ever to score in a World Cup match. England didn’t qualify for this competition, but I watched a lot of the games anyway, although I was less interested in football than I had been 4 years earlier . My interests were more focused on music and girls and that sort of thing. I was 17 and one of my friends had a free house during the final week of the tournament. We all hung out there in a big gang and watched a lot of games together. Fun times.

1998
The 1998 World Cup was held in France. Iran beat the Maldives in qualification by the widest margin in World Cup history: 17–0. Hosts France won the tournament by beating Brazil 3–0 in the final. What a great moment for the French! There was a lot of hype around the Brazilian squad going into the competition, especially around the star player Ronaldo. As the scorer of four goals in the tournament, Ronaldo appeared to be less than a hundred percent in the match, and was unable to make any impact. Some say that he shouldn’t have started the game as he wasn’t fit or healthy enough. I’ve heard suggestions that as team sponsors, Nike put pressure on the team to play Ronaldo, as he was so important for their brand image. Certainly there was a sense that the World Cup had become way too commercialised and more about money making than the true values of the World Cup. Debutants Croatia finished a commendable third. I watched many of the key games at home, on my own :( This is when I was on summer holiday from university, living at my parents house, in the middle of nowhere. We lived in the countryside and I didn’t have a car, so I had to try and persuade my mates to come and collect me so I could watch games with them. A lot of the time I was just stranded on my own, shouting at the TV. I was 21. England were knocked out by Argentina in the 2nd round. Yes, on penalties.

2002
The 2002 World Cup was the first to be held in Asia, and was hosted jointly by South Korea and Japan. Australia defeated American Samoa 31–0 in a preliminary match – a new record for the margin of victory, and the highest-scoring match ever in World Cup history. 31-0??? Australia should have saved some of those goals. The could have used them last week. The tournament was a successful one for teams traditionally regarded as minnows (small fish), with South Korea, Senegal and USA all reaching the last eight. Brazil beat Germany 2–0 in the final for their fifth title. I was in Japan during this competition. I was 25 years old. England were knocked out by Brazil in the 2nd round, not on penalties, but it still hurt. I watched one of the games in Saitama stadium. It was England vs Norway. Most of the crowd were England fans. Japanese England fans. The Japanese loved England, but I think that was mainly because of David Beckham.

2006
The 2006 World Cup was held in Germany. Brazil and England were initially the English bookmakers’ favourites. A strong performance by Germany brought them as far as the semifinals. However, the final match-up was between Italy and France, in which French captain Zinedine Zidane was sent off in the last 10 minutes of extra time for a headbutt to the chest of Italian central defender Marco Materazzi. Apparently Materazzi was whispering some insults into Zidane’s ear, and Zidane just lost it. The headbutt was pretty shocking, but it was also one of the most impressive moments in the game! POW! A headbutt direct to the chest and Materazzi hit the deck! Really, it’s a pity that this happened, because Zidane is one of the best players we’ve had in the world, and this really tainted his image. He’s be celebrated more if it wasn’t for that. Italy went on to win 5–3 in a penalty shootout, the score having been 1–1 after 90 minutes and extra time. I watched this game in my flat in London, joined at half time by a Polish friend called Marek who brought beer, and who might be listening to this. Hello Marek. I was 29 years old.

2010
The 2010 World Cup was held in South Africa. It was the first cup hosted in African, and the cup was won by Spain. The tournament was noted for its highly defensive opening matches, controversies surrounding goal-line technology, and the introduction of vuvuzelas, which some people believe destroyed the atmosphere at many of the games. The noise was pretty annoying. [Play vuvuzela sound] It sounds like a swarm of angry bees or something. The main problem was that it was just a constant droning sound. There was no difference between a goal and normal play. Just a constant AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA sound. Though considered as one of the tournament favourites, the Spaniards won the cup despite scoring only 8 goals in 7 games and losing their opening match to Switzerland. In a final which saw a record number of yellow cards distributed and what some considered violent play from the Dutch side, the 10-man Netherlands squad were defeated 1–0 in the 116th minute of extra time by an Andrés Iniesta goal. Maybe the Dutch defeat of Spain last week was a bit of revenge. I watched a lot of this in London with my girlfriend. I was 33. England were pretty rubbish. We seemed to have no team spirit at all. The players didn’t gel, and Rooney was a disappointment. We got smashed by an amazing German team 5-1. Frank Lampard had a goal disallowed by the referee, although it did cross the line. Perhaps this was justice for the non-goal which was allowed back in the 1966 final when England beat West Germany. England were knocked out of the tournament. But I’m still with my girlfriend!

That brings us up to the current world cup, which is of course being held in Brazil. The next one is due to be held in Russia in 2018, and then in Qatar in 2022. Hopefully, I will still be recording Luke’s English Podcast, and I will still be with my girlfriend, who at that point will have become my wife!

So that’s the end of my World Cup History. As usual, leave me your comments. I’ve opened another comments thread in the discussion forum. Write comments there and I will read them out on the podcast when I get the chance.

Bye for now,
Luke

My interview on the All Ears English Podcast

Hi everyone,

Today I am featured as a guest on the All Ears English podcast. In the episode you can hear me talking about comedy, humour and telling jokes in English. Click the picture to listen to the episode on the All Ears English website or use this embedded player.

https://www.podtrac.com/pts/redirect.mp3/pdst.fm/e/chrt.fm/track/CB27B5/traffic.megaphone.fm/ALLE5073533650.mp3?updated=1648593059

Luke Episode 122-2

You might already know All Ears English. It’s a podcast produced by two American girls called Gabby & Lindsay. They’re both English teachers with lots of experience who also do a podcast for learners of English.

Recently I got a tweet from Lindsay asking if I would like to be interviewed for one of their episodes, and I was glad to accept. It’s fun to be featured on someone else’s podcast for a change. Also, it’s good to establish contact with other podcasters. It was pretty exciting to talk to the girls on Skype and find out how we have a lot of things in common even though we are from completely different countries. Because I am a comedian (as well as a teacher) they were interested in hearing my perspective on differences between British & American humour, and some of my tips on telling jokes in English. Of course, there’s a lot to say on that topic so it is something I plan to revisit fully on LEP.

Here’s a summary of my tips on how to tell jokes in English. As I said, I plan to revisit this subject fully on LEP as there is so much to say!

Luke’s advice on how to tell jokes in English:

  • Be careful about telling jokes in social situations
  • Know when it’s appropriate to tell a joke. Sometimes there might be an informal joke-telling situation with your friends. That’s a great time to try your joke.
  • Be careful about the subject of the joke. Don’t make jokes about race, age, weight, gender or sexual orientation (especially in the United States)
  • Try to tell a spontaneous joke rather than a preplanned joke. The joke is more of an attitude than a specific joke. Instead, develop an attitude that is funny and lighthearted.
  • Make sure that you know the joke well when you are telling the joke so that you don’t forget the punchline.
  • Keep it short and sweet.
  • It should sound natural.
  • Don’t laugh too much at your own joke.
    • Be prepared if your joke doesn’t work, but don’t worry about it too much.

Look out for more episodes on humour in social situations in the future!

180. How my Brother Dislocated his Shoulder (with James)

aka “My Brother’s Skateboarding Injury”, or “Breaking Up is Hard to Do”, or “A Cup of Morphine with James Thompson”.

Two days ago my brother fell off his skateboard and dislocated his shoulder. In this episode he tells us all about what happened. We also chat about how he still loves skateboarding after 30 years and lots of injuries.

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The episode is an authentic Skype call between my brother me. It is full of vocabulary for describing accidents, injuries, hospitals and medical treatments. You can find a lot of that vocabulary listed below, and I will explain it for you in the next episode of the podcast. We also talk about skateboarding, and so you’ll hear quite a lot of vocabulary on that subject too.

Vocabulary
Let me help you understand and learn the vocabulary! I have listened to the conversation again and I’ve typed out bits of vocabulary from the first 15 minutes. That’s when he explains how he had his accident, and how he received treatment for it. You can find that vocabulary in a list of sentences below. What I’m going to do now is to record another episode in which I clarify and explain the vocabulary from the interview. I’ll publish that as soon as I’ve finished it. So, in order to get definitions of these phrases, just listen to the next episode.

Transcript
The transcript writing collaboration is going really well, with more episodes being transcribed by listeners all the time. If you fancy transcribing some of this episode, you can. Just click here to access the Google document.

Vocabulary List
Listen to the next episode of the podcast to hear me explain all these things in more detail.
First of all – sorry for my brother’s fiddling and fidgeting!
I’m not too bad thanks, considering…
The day before yesterday I came a cropper on my skateboard and dislocated my shoulder
The arm popped out of its socket
I feel a bit, sort of, run down, I suppose would be the word. A bit tired and achy.
Just the twatty landlord using the garden as some sort of rubbish tip as usual.
I was skating a block-sort of-bar thing. “Skating the block“, not “skating on the block“. (The difference is quite important if you’re a skater)
I was doing a board slide on it but it kept sticking.
I leant back a little bit more.
As I was coming off the block I landed fine but slightly on the tail of the board. (Nose, tail, wheels, trucks, grip tape, bearings – skateboard parts).
Slightly off-balance.
I put my hand down to stop myself falling but I carried on sliding out. My feet slid underneath me and I overextended my arm behind my head, and kind of slammed down on my body. My weight came down on my arm.
I immediately jumped up and it felt really really weird.
I felt a shelf where the shoulder-blade (he means collar bone I think) stopped and then there was a 2 inch gap and then the arm. (ouch!)
I knew at that point that I’d dislocated my shoulder. (Past perfect tense)
To start with there wasn’t any pain, the pain came a few minutes in.
I don’t normally get an ambulance for a self-inflicted injury. (what a tough and modest guy he is!)
I normally get a bus or a taxi to A&E but this time I thought it warranted it because I couldn’t move at all.
[It was] extreme muscular pain, like when you tear ligaments or sprain an ankle.
They were going “ooh” which makes you feel uncomfortable if someone’s wincing, you know.
They tried to get a needle into me for a drip. They couldn’t get a vein to bleed properly. (they couldn’t find a vein)
They put some intravenous paracetamol into me, which didn’t really do anything.
It’s an over-the-counter pain-relief pill.
Why are there no aspirins in the jungle? Because the parrots eat them all (the ‘paracetamol’ – yes, it’s a terrible joke)
I gritted my teeth and tried to ignore what was going on.
They drove me with the ‘woo-woos’ on.
(I tell James to stop fiddling… and he says…) I can’t remember where we were now.
They wheeled me into the hospital. (I attempt to highlight the irony of getting injured on a wheeled vehicle and then being taken into a hospital on another wheeled vehicle – it’s an unsuccessful joke, but never mind)
An Indian-looking doctor looked at me.
You can relax a bit when the doctor seems quite in-control.
He told me exactly what was going to happen. I’d need an x-ray to check that nothing was broken, then if nothing was broken then they’d give me some more drugs and then put it back in, and then they’d give me another x-ray to check that nothing had broken while they were putting it back in, which kind of made me think it might be quite a painful process having it set back.
They gave me some morphine, and it didn’t seem to do anything and I was, like, grimacing a bit, so they gave me some more.
They gave you morphine and they gave you nitrous oxide?
You’re breaking up a little bit.
Do you find that breaking up is very hard to do? (This was probably quite confusing, but it’s my brother’s attempt at a sardonic joke – referring to a famous song which uses the same phrase, but with a different meaning)
“You’re breaking up” (your phone/skype signal is not clear)
“Breaking up is hard to do” (Separating, splitting up with your boyfriend or girlfriend – there are two songs that use this phrase, “Make it easy on yourself” by The Walker Brothers & written by Burt Bacharach, and “Breaking Up is Hard to Do” by Neil Sedaka. You can listen to those original songs below. Sorry about my singing.
(James receives a phone call from his girlfriend because she wants to check that he’s okay. How sweet.)
She was a bit worried about me because I was a bit sort of groggy yesterday.
I feel a bit sort of run down, a bit beaten up, but fine.
Good thing you didn’t hit your head.
I didn’t shatter my collar bone or something like that, that would have been horrible.
It could have been something worse.
You don’t need a cast. Nothing’s broken.

That’s as much as I’m able to do at this moment. You’ll just have to listen to the rest of the conversation unaided and try to work out exactly what we’re saying. It’ll be good for your English!

The Selfie of Jim in Hospital
IMG_9692-3

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Songs and Videos

Here are some videos and songs that James and I mention during this episode.

Real skating at Stockwell skate park in Brixton, South London. This is where my brother goes skating. The video was filmed and edited by James himself.

“Make it easy on yourself” by The Walker Brothers

“Breaking Up is Hard to Do” by Neil Sedaka

The French Connection (1971) with Gene Hackman – The amazing car chase scene (A big inspiration for the computer game “Driver” by the way…)

“Speedfreaks” 1989 Skate Movie (Santa Cruz Skateboards)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvS72jdFbEk

158. & 159. A Cup of Tea with… Paul Taylor (Parts 1 & 2)

Part-transcript available below
Hello! In this Christmas episode I am joined by Paul Taylor who is that rare thing; an English guy who can speak other languages.

Paul is also a stand-up comedian who specialises in observing funny things about different cultures. He is also really good at doing different accents.

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Part 2

[DOWNLOAD]
A TRANSCRIPT FOR THIS EPISODE IS CURRENTLY BEING PRODUCED BY LISTENERS. CLICK HERE TO HELP FINISH THE TRANSCRIPT OF THIS EPISODE ON A GOOGLE DOCUMENT :)

In the episode we talk about Christmas traditions, his experiences of living in other countries and plenty of other things, including some examples of different accents in English. Enjoy the show!

Here is a video of Paul performing stand-up comedy around the world:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7q2Xn6jEsdQ&w=500&h=281]
And here’s one from a performance in Spanish, with English subtitles:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1H5bpbSm30&w=500&h=281]

Here is a link to the Wkikipedia page for Fawlty Towers, which is the sit-com set in Torquay on the south coast of England. And, here’s a clip from the show. It’s old, but it’s a classic ;)
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-oH-TELcLE&w=500&h=375]

Merry Christmas everyone!

Luke

TRANSCRIPT FOR EPISODES 158 & 159
Here is a transcript for the first five minutes of episode 158, sent in by a listener called Dmitry, and proofread by me.
Hello ladies and gentlemen.

Welcome to Luke’s English Podcast.

– “What is that sound”, you are probably thinking. Well, that is the sound of Christmas, ladies and gentlemen. It should be the sound of Christmas. It is actually a tambourine.

Paul – Ho, ho, ho!

Luke – Is that Santa?

Paul – Ho, ho, ho!

Luke – It sounds like Santa. It is not actually Santa. It is just my friend Paul Taylor who is joining with me for this episode and it is nearly Christmas, so: Hello, Paul! How are you?

Paul – Hi, Luke! I am doing very well. It is very close to Christmas. 19th of December currently.

Luke – Yes, we’ve just got six days, before Christmas

Paul – I used to be more excited than this…

Luke – Me too.

Paul – …six days, before Christmas. I used to be going crazy.

Luke – Yeah, me too. I used to… I used to get so excited, when I was a kid, about Christmas. You don’t get excited anymore?

Paul – Um, noooooo, I do not know why. It is particularly this year, like I am very unexcited. I have been excited previous years. Um, but just not feeling it this year. I do not know why.

Luke – I used to…, you know, every day, I used to count the days, literally, I used to count down the days until it was Christmas. You know, starting the December I would be – “Only 28 days ’til Christmas”, for example.

Paul – At the beginning of December, when do you have Christmas?

Luke – Yeah, I couldn’t count, I was only four and anyway, I used to get so excited and when it got to Christmas Eve I would be so unbelievably excited that  I wouldn’t be able to sleep. I remember lying in bed on Christmas Eve, I would just trying to force myself to go to sleep, so I could then wake up and open my presents.

Paul – That is scarily similar to how I used to feel. Although, probably, a lot of English people maybe have gone through the same experience. I think, one of the things, that, potentially, I am not excited about or the reason I am not excited about is that I do not have this year an advent calendar. I have noticed that you have a Kinder advent calendar, which I was almost going to buy, but it was  too late and now, you have eaten nineteen chocolates or shared nineteen chocolates.

Luke – It is an advent calendar. What is an advent calendar, Paul?

Paul – An advent calendar – so, “advent” is a term which I do not know where It comes from, but it is the term that depicted for the calendar that usually you open every day. So, there’s twenty-five or some, calendars go up to thirty-one, but most go up to twenty-five in the UK, anyway. Twenty-five days and behind …you open each like a door, each day, and each day, there is something waiting for you. Whether it is a picture… so the kinder calendar you have, em, I presume, has kinder branded chocolates behind, whether it is like a mini egg or whether it is a kinder Bueno. Whether it is whatever else it is. I love kinder.

Luke – You, you are quite familiar with a range of kinder products – Bueno?

Paul – The kinder Bueno and, the kinder Bueno It is like the soft, the soft one is really good. Yeah, that is an advent calendar. I believe an advent – it is something to do with a religious aspect of Christmas.

Luke – Yeah

Paul – But, I can not remember the exact. It is something to do with the date, emmmmmmm.

Luke – Yeah! Exactly! So, when I was a kid, I used to have an advent calendar which, um, was very nice. It had like a religious scene on it, some Christian image on it and you would find, um, there would be a door for each, um, um, day of the month and you would open, you find a door, you open it and behind it there is a picture, like a wise man or something.

Paul – Uhoo.

Luke – Or there would be a picture of, you know, some Christmas related to a Christian thing, a picture of, em, aaaaa, mmmmm, a shepherd, you know, a picture of a church and then, the last picture is always the baby Jesus. There he is. But this one, I have got here, is completely un-Christian, I think it’s… There is nothing religious about this, this Kinder advent calendar at all.

Paul – No, it is, um, it is just full of chocolate. Now, be honest. Well, now, you are probably at the age when it does not really matter, but when you were younger and you had an advent calendars which had chocolate in them

Luke – Yeah

Paul – …did you secretly open, …

Luke – Yeah

Paul – … like… day… twenty-four.. when It was actually the sixteenth and you eat the chocolate and then kind of close it up?

Luke – Yes. I did.

You can help to finish this transcript here, by using a google doc. Click for more information and to collaborate with other listeners. 

150. British Slang (D to G)

More informal English for you to pick up in this episode as we continue the series on British slang words.

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Below you’ll find a list of slang words from http://www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml with some other words which I added. The explanations in this list are mainly reproduced from effingpot.com but the explanations you will hear on this podcast episode are all my own.

I hope you enjoy learning more British slang, and stay tuned for more podcasts in the near future.

Cheers!

Luke

Other Slang Episodes In This Series
British Slang (A-C)
British Slang (D-G)
British Slang (H-M)
British Slang (N-Z)

LIST OF SLANG TERMS FROM THIS EPISODE (Thanks also to www.effingpot.com/slang.shtml)
Dear – If something is dear it means it is expensive. I thought Texan insurance was dear. It’s also a term of affection that an older person might use. “Hello dear, would you like a cuppa?”
DIY – This is short for do it yourself and applies not just to the DIY stores but also to anything that you need to do yourself. For example, if we get really bad service in a restaurant (oh, you noticed!) then we might ask the waiter if it is a DIY restaurant – just to wind them up.
Do – A party. You would go to a do if you were going to a party in the UK.
Do – If you drive along a motorway in the wrong lane the police will do you. You could then tell your friends that you have been done by the police. Prosecute is another word for it!
Do someone over
Doddle – Something that is a doddle is a cinch, it’s easy. Unlike ordering water in Texas with an English accent, which is definitely not a doddle!
Dodgy – If someone or something is a bit dodgy, it is not to be trusted. Dodgy food should be thrown away at home, or sent back in a restaurant. Dodgy people are best avoided. You never know what they are up to. Dodgy goods may have been nicked. When visiting Miami I was advised by some English chums that certain areas were a bit dodgy and should be avoided!
the Dog’s bollocks – You would say that something really fantastic was the dog’s bollocks. Comes from the fact that a dog’s bollocks are so fantastic that he can’t stop licking them! Nice huh? Often shortened to just “The dog’s”.
Donkey’s years – Someone said to me the other day that they hadn’t seen me for donkey’s years. It means they hadn’t seen me for ages.
Dude
Faff – To faff is to dither or to fanny around. If we procrastinated when getting ready for bed, as kids, our Dad use tell us we were faffing around.
Fag
Fancy – If you fancy something then it means you desire it. There are two basic forms in common use – food and people. If you fancy a cake for example it means you like the look of it and you want to eat it. If you see someone then you might fancy them if you liked the look of them and wanted to get to know them a little better!!!
Fit – Fit is a word that I have heard a lot recently – it seems to be making a comeback. A fit bird means a girl who is pretty good looking or tasty! A fit bloke would be the male equivalent.
Flog – To Flog something is to sell it. It also means to beat something with a whip, but when your wife tells you she flogged the old TV it is more likely she has sold it than beaten it (hopefully!).
Fluke – If something great happened to you by chance that would be a fluke. When I was a kid my Mum lost her engagement ring on the beach and only realised half way home. We went back to the spot and she found it in the sand. That was a fluke.
Fortnight – Two weeks. Comes from an abbreviation of “fourteen nights”. Hence terms like “I’m off for a fortnights holiday” meaning “I am going on a two week vacation”.
Full of beans – This means to have loads of energy. It is a polite way of saying that a child is a maniac. I was often described as being full of beans as a kid and now it is my wife’s way of telling me to keep still when she is trying to get to sleep. Strangely the same expression in some parts of the US means that you are exaggerating or talking bollocks!
Geezer
Get lost! – Politely translated as go away, this is really a mild way of telling someone to f*** off!
Get stuffed! – Even politer way to tell someone to get lost is to tell them to get stuffed. However, this is still not a nice thing to say to someone.
Getting off with – This seems to be the objective of most teenagers on a big night out. Getting off with someone means making out or snogging them.
Give us a bell – This simply means call me. You often hear people use the word “us” to mean “me”.
Giz
Gobsmacked – Amazed. Your gob is your mouth and if you smack your gob, it would be out of amazement.
Good value – This is short for good value for money. It means something is a good deal.
Goolies – If you have been kicked in the goolies, your eyes would be watering and you would be clutching your balls!
Gormless – A gormless person is someone who has absolutely no clue. You would say clueless. It is also shortened so you could say someone is a total gorm or completely gormy.
Grub – Food. Similar to nosh. I remember my Dad calling “grub’s up”, when dinner was ready as a kid. A grub is also an insect larva. Not usually eaten in England. Actually is available in some Australian restaurants!
Gutted – If someone is really upset by something they might say that they were gutted. Like when you are told that you have just failed your driving test!

148. British Slang (A to C)

Part 1 in a series about informal British English words and expressions.

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Slang basically means informal language which is used among friends, and which isn’t really appropriate at work or in other formal situations.

This podcast is devoted to teaching you some of the most common and well-known bits of British slang. As a British person born and bred, I have lived in London, the midlands and Liverpool. There is a lot of variation in the slang used in different regions of England or The UK. The words I’m going to teach you are words which are pretty normal for me. Scotland, Wales or Ireland may have different variations. Also, people much younger than me, or people in different ethnic groups might use different slang. The slang I present in this episode is a selection of words I grew up with, or words I often hear my friends using.

*RUDE LANGUAGE*
Slang is not rude by definition, but there are some rude words included in this episode. Please consider this before listening or before using in class.

Below you can read the slang terms I present in this episode, with some explanations.

You can expect more episodes in this series in the future.

Cheers ;)

Other Slang Episodes In This Series
British Slang (A-C)
British Slang (D-G)
British Slang (H-M)
British Slang (N-Z)

SLANG TERMS (from A to C)
Ace – If something is ace it is awesome. I used to hear it a lot in Liverpool. Kids thought all cool stuff was ace, or brill.

Aggro – Short for aggravation, it’s the sort of thing you might expect at a football match. In other words – trouble! There is sometimes aggro in the cities after the pubs shut!

All right? – This is used a lot around London and the south to mean, “Hello, how are you”? You would say it to a complete stranger or someone you knew. The normal response would be for them to say “All right”? back to you. It is said as a question. Sometimes it might get expanded to “all right mate”? Mostly used by blue collar workers but also common among younger people.

Arse – This is a word that doesn’t seem to exist in America. It basically means the same as ass, but is much ruder. It is used in phrases like “pain in the arse” (a nuisance) or I “can’t be arsed” (I can’t be bothered) or you might hear something was “a half arsed attempt” meaning that it was not done properly.

Arsehole – Asshole to you. Not a nice word in either language.
Arseholed – Drunk! Usually in the advanced stages of drunken stupor, someone would be considered “completely arseholed”. Never me, of course!

Baccy – Tobacco. The sort you use to roll your own.
bent – 1. dishonest or corrupt, 2. homosexual (mildly derogatory)

Bladdered – This rather ugly expression is another way of saying you are drunk. The link is fairly apparent I feel!

Bird – girl or girlfriend

blag – lie or talking nonsense.

Blatant – We use this word a lot to mean something is really obvious.

Blimey – Another exclamation of surprise. My Dad used to say “Gawd Blimey” or “Gor Blimey” or even “Cor Blimey”. It is all a corruption of the oath God Blind Me.

Bloke – man
Bloody – One of the most useful swear words in English. Mostly used as an exclamation of surprise i.e. “bloody hell” or “bloody nora”. Something may be “bloody marvellous” or “bloody awful”. It is also used to emphasise almost anything, “you’re bloody mad”, “not bloody likely” and can also be used in the middle of other words to emphasise them. E.g. “Abso-bloody-lutely”! Americans should avoid saying “bloody” as they sound silly.

Blooming – Another alternative to the word bloody.

Bob’s your uncle – This is a well used phrase. It is added to the end of sentences a bit like and that’s it! For example if you are telling someone how to make that fabulous banoffee pie you just served them, you would tell them to boil the condensed milk for three hours, spread it onto a basic cheesecake base, slice bananas on top, add some whipped double cream, another layer of banana and Bob’s your uncle!

Bog – Toilet
Bog roll – Toilet paper

Bogey – green sticky things that come out of your nose

Bollocks – This is a great English word with many excellent uses. Technically speaking it means testicles but is typically used to describe something that is no good (that’s bollocks) or that someone is talking rubbish (he’s talking bollocks). Surprisingly it is also used in a positive manner to describe something that is the best, in which case you would describe it as being “the dog’s bollocks”. Englishmen who live in America take great delight in ordering specialised registration plates for their cars using the letters B.O.L.L.O.X. Good eh?

Bollocking- A severe telling off

Booze – As a noun, an alcoholic drink; as a verb, to drink alcohol, particularly to excess.

Bottle – Something you have after twenty pints of lager and a curry. A lotta bottle! This means courage. If you have a lotta bottle you have no fear.

Brew – a cup of tea

Budge up – If you want to sit down and someone is taking up too much space, you’d ask them to budge up – move and make some space.

Buff – muscular, well built

Bugger – This is another fairly unique word with no real American equivalent. Like bloody it has many uses apart from the obvious dictionary one pertaining to rather unusual sexual habits. My father was always shouting “bugger” when he was working in the garage or garden. Usually when he hit his thumb or dropped a nail or lost something. Today we might use the sh** or the f*** words but bugger is still as common. The fuller version of this would be “bugger it”. It can also be used to tell someone to get lost (bugger off), or to admit defeat (we’re buggered) or if you were tired or exhausted you would be buggered. You can also call someone a bugger. When I won £10 on the lottery my mate called me a “lucky bugger”.

Bugger all – If something costs bugger all, it means that it costs nothing. Meaning it is cheap. If you have bugger all, it means you have nothing.

Bum – This is the part of your body you sit on. Your ass! It might also be someone who is down and out, like a tramp. You might also bum around, if you are doing nothing in particular, just hanging out. Finally to bum something means to scrounge it from someone.

Bung – To bung something means to throw it. For example a street trader might bung something in for free if you pay cash right now! Or you could say “bung my car keys over, mate”.

Butchers – To have a butchers at something is to have a look. This is a cockney rhyming slang word that has become common. The reason “butchers” means a look even though it doesn’t rhyme is because it is short for “butchers hook” and “hook” of course, does rhyme.

Chat up – To chat someone up is to try and pick them up. If you spotted a scrummy girly in a bar you might try to chat her up. Or a girl might try and chat up a chap!

Chav – Someone who is, or pretends to be of a low social standing and who dresses in a certain style, typically badly or in sports clothing. Often used as a form of derogation. Sometimes said to be an acronym for ‘Council-Housed and Violent’ but this appears to have come later. Most likely to come from the Romany for child; chavi.

Cheeky – “Eee you cheeky monkey” was what my mother said to me all the time when I was a kid. Cheeky means you are flippant, have too much lip or are a bit of a smart arse! Generally you are considered to be a bit cheeky if you have an answer for everything and always have the last word. My licence plate on my MX5 (Miata in American) was CHEEKY, which most Texans thought was something to do with bottoms – wrong!! A cheeky pint.

Cheers – This word is obviously used when drinking with friends. However, it also has other colloquial meanings. For example when saying goodbye you could say “cheers”, or “cheers then”. It also means thank you. Americans could use it in English pubs, but should avoid the other situations as it sounds wrong with an American accent. Sorry!

Cheesed off – This is a polite way of saying you are pissed off with something.

Chin Wag – This is another word for a Chat. You can probably tell why!

Chuffed – You would be chuffed to bits if you were really pleased about something.

Cock up – A cock up means you have made a mistake. It has nothing to do with parts of the male body.

Cockney rhyming slang – There are lots of words that make up cockney rhyming slang. These are basically rhyming words like “butchers hook” which means “look”. If you are in London and you hear someone talk about a Septic they are probably talking about you – because it’s short for “Septic tank” which equals “yank”, which is our word for an American. How do you like that!

Cor – You’ll often hear a Brit say “cor”! It is another one of those expressions of surprise that we seem to have so many of. It will sometimes be lengthened to “cor blimey” or “cor love a duck”, depending on where you are. “Cor blimey” is a variation of “Gawd Blimey” or “Gor Blimey”. They are all a corruption of the oath “God Blind Me”.

Cracking – If something is cracking, it means it is the best. Usually said without pronouncing the last “G”. If a girl is cracking it means she is stunning.

Crap – The same word in both countries – but less rude here. I loved watching Brits being interviewed on US chat shows and embarrassing the interviewer when they said something was “total crap”.