My friend Anna has written a book for children (7+) which has a full publishing contract and is available in all good bookshops now. The book tells the story of a boy who accidentally creates a monster when his secret collection of nose bogeys gets struck by lightning! This conversation includes lots of talk of snot and bogeys, as well as stories from Anna’s time as a travel writer.
Kate Billington returns to LEP for the third time, to drink tea, talk about my pod-room, learning the bassoon, exam results, learning Chinese, responding to listener comments and talking about her videos on TikTok.
The British Council on TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@britishcouncilenglish?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc
Kate’s video about “It’s raining cats and dogs”
@britishcouncilenglish Replying to @sentimentalbxtch Way ahead of you! #learnontiktok #learnenglish #idioms #edutok #vocabulary #english ♬ original sound – British Council English
@britishcouncilenglish ♬ original sound – British Council English
@britishcouncilenglish Kate’s back with another ‘very funny joke’ (she made me write that…)! Tell us what you think! #britishhumour #britishcomedy #englishteacher #learnenglish #learnontiktok #vocabulary ♬ original sound – British Council English
British Council Mini-English Lesson on For & Since
Previous appearances on LEP
Hello listeners,
Welcome back to Luke’s English Podcast. I hope you are doing fine out there in podcast land.
Kate Billington is back on the podcast today. Of course, you remember her from episodes 689 and 705.
If you heard those episodes I’m sure you will remember Kate and I know that a lot of you out there will be very happy that she is back again and yes, Kate’s return to this podcast is long overdue. She was a very popular guest when she was on the show before. So it’s great to have her back.
Some of you don’t know Kate because you haven’t heard those episodes but there’s no need for me to introduce her fully now in the intro because I kind of do that again during the conversation, except that Kate is an English teacher from England and we work together at the British Council.
People sometimes ask if Kate has her own podcast or YouTube channel or something, because they want to hear more from her.
Well, recently she started making videos for TikTok. We do talk about this during the episode, but that’s not until the end of the conversation, so I just wanted to give you a heads up about that right now at the start.
Kate is part of a team of teachers making content for the British Council’s channel on TikTok. You’ll see that they are making shorter videos (certainly shorter than mine) about things like British English idioms, culture and other entertaining bits and pieces. So, check it out – @BritishCouncilEnglish on TikTok. The link is on the page for this episode on my website.
So, what you are about to hear is another long and rambling conversation with a guest on my podcast. Hopefully you will stay engaged and entertained throughout while practising your English listening in the process.
All you have to do as you listen to this is keep up with the changes and tangents, and enjoy this conversational journey into things like how Kate helped me with the shelves in my pod-room, how Kate doesn’t agree with the way I arrange my books on those shelves, how it feels to be filmed while talking (and yes there is a video version of this on YouTube), we talk about Kate’s academic successes and failures (or maybe I should say “failure” because it seems there’s only been one, and I’m still not sure it counts as a failure), the Chinese classes that Kate has been taking recently, quite a lot of stuff about Korea (hello Korean listeners), our blood types and what they mean, how we both feel about getting older, and how we feel about certain other English teaching video content that you might find on TikTok, Instagram or YouTube. All that, and much more, starting… now.
An episode all about studying at university in the UK, with loads of advice about student visas, funding your studies with scholarships, extra-curricular social activities and opportunities at the Students’ Union and more. Features a conversation with a German student currently studying a master’s in clinical neuropsychology at UCL in London. This bonus episode is published in paid partnership with Study UK and the British Council’s GREAT Britain campaign. For more information, follow the links below.
👉 The Study UK website with all the info you need https://study-uk.britishcouncil.org/
👉 Student Visas https://www.gov.uk/study-uk-student-visa
👉 Scholarships and funding https://study-uk.britishcouncil.org/scholarships-funding
👉 Study in Wales https://www.studyinwales.ac.uk/
👉 Scholarships for Welsh universities https://www.studyinwales.ac.uk/scholarships-and-funding
👉 German Academic Exchange for information about scholarships https://www.daad.de/en/
👉 German Federal Ministry of Education and Research https://www.xn--bafg-7qa.de/bafoeg/de/home/home_node.html
👉 International Health Insurance Surcharge Refund www.gov.uk/healthcare-immigration-application/refunds
👉 Working while on a student visa – The UK Council for International Student Affairs https://www.ukcisa.org.uk/
👉 Study Guides for Parents in Germany https://www.britishcouncil.de/sites/default/files/studyuk_guide_parents_en_2023_final.pdf
My dad has written a new book and he’s come on the podcast to tell us about it. The book follows the path of the river Avon as it flows through the middle of England, telling stories of key moments in British history, nature and the current condition of Britain’s rivers.
A conversation with Anna Tyrie from English Like a Native (YouTube, Podcast) about children, the way we talk to children, and vocabulary relating to children and childcare, and some special news from the Thompson family…!
Hello, welcome back to LEP.
Here is another episode with more English listening practice for you to get stuck into, and I have another guest on the show today.
This time it is Anna Tyrie from English Like a Native, the channel on YouTube. You might also know her from Instagram and TikTok.
Anna has recently set up a podcast too, which you can find wherever you get your podcasts. It’s called the English Like a Native Podcast.
In fact, on the same day we recorded the conversation for this episode of my show, Anna also interviewed me for her podcast and we had a good long conversation about all sorts of things. It was very nice to be interviewed by her. You should be able to find that episode on her show now. So if you enjoy this one, go ahead and listen to the one on Anna’s podcast too. You will find a link in the description 👆.
In this conversation: Get to know Anna a bit and talk a bit about her podcast and youtube channel and what the name really means.
The main subject – talking about children. We decided that we could talk about a particular topic for this episode and that topic ended up being children. I’ve had requests from listeners in the past for more on the subject of children and the English language, including the way we talk to children, the way we talk about children and the specific words for lots of things related to children.
We talk about our own kids, and specifically about how we communicate with them, typical things we say to them (in English of course), how we should be careful about the things we say to our kids, the ways adults adapt their English when talking to little children, including examples of so-called “baby talk” or “parentese” and then there is a sort of quiz at the end with questions about specific English words for lots of the different objects, toys and bits of useful equipment that we use with babies and little kids.
As you know I have a daughter and she is 5 so a lot of that baby stuff almost seems like a distant memory now, but, well, it’s high time I remembered all of that vocab again now because – drum roll… yes, my wife is pregnant again and we going to have another baby!
Yes we are delighted.
Thank you – because at this moment of course you are now saying…
“Wow, that’s fantastic! Congratulations! I’m so happy for you!” and then all the typical questions will come to mind, including:
Etc.
I’m sure I’ll talk about it again in another podcast, but I thought I would let you know now.
Of course the child hasn’t even been born yet, so there’s a long way to go.
But all being well, in July there will be a new Thompson arriving 😊
I don’t know how that will affect the podcast.
Of course it’s probably going to disrupt things to some extent as I will be busy at home, with my wife, looking after the baby, helping my wife with anything if she needs it, taking care of our daughter, trying to keep things ship shape and under control and generally just being at home focusing on the family.
So I won’t be able to do much podcasting around the time of the birth and in the weeks after. Who knows, maybe I’ll disappear completely for July and August, or maybe I’ll find a way to keep podcasting.
Maybe, if I’m organised and industrious enough, by the time the baby arrives I will have recorded lots of episodes beforehand, which I will be able to publish over the summer, or maybe I’ll dig into my archives for some unpublished or lesser-known material, which a lot of people haven’t heard – like app-only episodes from the LEP App (which is now defunct by the way).
In any case, there might be some kind of disruption to the show. Thank you for your understanding and your patience and your lovely messages of congratulations and support, which you are welcome to write to me.
Obviously, I’ve just said thank you for a thing you haven’t even done yet, which is kind of against the rules, but anyway. There it is. We’re very happy. We’re hoping everything goes well. I’ll probably talk about it a bit more in another episode later on.
So, now let’s get back down to earth here because this is a conversation with Anna from English Like a Native, getting to know Anna a bit and then talking about the English which we use with kids, about kids and for all the bits and pieces involved in looking after kids.
By the way, this conversation was recorded in January, which is why I say “It’s January” at the start. I probably didn’t need to say this, did I? You probably have the deductive skills to work out that when I say to Anna “it’s January” it’s because we recorded that in January. But just in case you were worried that I don’t know what month it is, don’t worry, I do know what month it is, what year it is and generally where I am and what’s going on. OK, fine.
I will speak to you a bit again at the end, but now let’s get started with the interview right now.
Thanks again to Anna.
You can find a vocabulary list and notes on the page for this episode on my website if you want to check specific words.
A reminder – after recording this, Anna interviewed me on her podcast and as I said earlier we had a good long conversation about lots of things, with little stories and jokes and stuff. A long conversation. I think it was even longer than the one you just listened to. I’m wondering how Anna is going to deal with that, but you can find out for yourself by listening to that episode on Anna’s podcast- English Like a Native, which is available wherever you get your podcasts.
Thanks for listening everyone.
Have a lovely day, morning, evening or night etc. Goodbye!
Examples of baby talk in English
This list includes words and phrases which came up in the quiz.
Steve Kaufmann is a very prolific language learner. He has learned at least 20 languages to varying degrees during his life. Some of them he learned during his career as an international diplomat and businessman, and others he has learned during his (semi) retirement. In this interview Steve talks about his language learning experiences, methods and motivations. We talk about various metaphors and similes for language learning including ocean voyages 🚢, cows 🐮, skiing ⛷ and cutting grass🏡, and I ask Steve about cross-cultural experiences he has had during his career. There is a video version but only the audio version contains my intro and ending rambles about getting my hair cut and how you need to remember that you’re a baby cow-shark on skis 🐄🦈🎿😅.
To qualify for British citizenship, one of the requirements is to pass the “Life in the UK” test. Questions cover things like British history, British life & culture, British politics, British geography and principles of modern British life. What do you think? Can you pass the test? Join me as I test online English teacher Cara Leopold (leo-listening.com). How much does she know about her own country of origin? What can you learn about Britain? What IS Britain anyway? Find out in this episode! Video version available.
An episode about two (unconnected) situations, 1) the very recent earthquake in Turkey & Syria which has left many people in urgent need of help, 2) the humanitarian crisis in Iran. During the episode I read from various articles and explain some vocabulary.
Hello,
Welcome to the podcast. I hope you’re doing well today and that you’ve been enjoying my recent episodes.
Here is another new one, published very soon after the last one.
Just in case you don’t know, this is a podcast for learners of English and it is here to provide some regular listening practice and generally to help improve my listeners’ English in various ways.
I have a fairly large audience around the world, which I have built up over the nearly 14 years I have been doing this podcast and in my episodes I talk about pretty much anything.
Often it’s funny stuff. Sometimes I tell short stories. I do episodes about British life and culture. I talk to guests. I teach vocabulary, grammar & pronunciation, give general advice and motivation for learning English, and every now and then I talk about what’s going on in the news including some serious stories which I just feel compelled to talk about.
I usually stick to events related to the UK, but there are times when I talk about other places too, and this episode is one of those times.
As you can see, the episode is called Turkey & Syria Earthquake Appeal / What is happening in Iran? (Articles & Vocabulary).
Basically, this episode is about those two situations.
I want to say that I’m doing this to provide information in order to give support to ordinary people who are suffering as a result of what has happened, and what is happening, in both situations.
The basic details of these two, separate, situations are these:
Early on Monday morning (Monday 6 February 2023) an area near the border between Turkey and Syria was hit by several massive earthquakes. Buildings have been turned to rubble, at present nearly 12,000 people have been killed and many more have been left homeless and are having to survive without infrastructure, without a great deal of resources and in very cold conditions.
Another situation, completely separate from that is that in Iran, for months and months now, there have been huge struggles between protesters and the government / police. The protesters have been demonstrating in order to stand up for their human rights and freedoms, especially the rights of women. The response of the government has been to crack down on those protests using a great deal of force and to try to control information around the situation, including putting restrictions on internet use. Women in particular are fighting to maintain their basic human rights, and their efforts to defend them have been met with strict and crushing treatment from the authorities. What I just said is based on a few reports I’ve read and also quite a lot of emails which I’ve received from podcast listeners in Iran.
I’ll say again that these two situations are not connected, but I am going to talk about them both in this episode. The earthquake in the first half and then the situation in Iran in the second half.
The first situation – the earthquake, is the result of a natural disaster of course, but there are political elements to it too, which I might not go into.
The second situation, in Iran, is clearly more political and therefore potentially more problematic for me to talk about but in any case I am just going to report what other people are saying about this situation, and I am doing that mainly because I have been asked, a lot of times, to do so by my listeners in Iran.
I don’t always respond to requests like that, because, well, I might talk about that later in the episode. So I don’t necessarily respond to requests to talk about such serious issues in other places, but for this episode I am deciding to do it.
This doesn’t mean I will always talk about things like this, or that I will always respond to other similar requests, or change the overall focus of my podcast towards these kinds of issues.
But here it is, I am going to talk about it here and I want to show support to my listeners. I’m not completely sure, honestly, what I can do regarding the situation in Iran (although I will mention some things later), but I can at least raise awareness and I suppose that can help, and if my moral support gives anyone even a small boost, then good.
In the case of the earthquake, there are more direct things we can do, chiefly in terms of donating money to charities who can provide direct aid and assistance. I’ll mention those specific charities in a bit.
So I’m talking about two situations in this long episode. I do hope you listen to the whole thing.
I realise that for most of you, learning English is the goal. Of course, this whole episode is presented in English and there is a transcript for most of what I am saying here so you can check that transcript and use it for practising your English in the usual ways. Perhaps you can notice the specific language I am using to to talk about and describe these serious events and issues here.
Also, I will be going into some specific vocabulary explanations in the second part of this episode – when I read through some articles.
OK, so I hope you keep listening and stick around for the whole thing, but it’s up to you of course.
Forgive me for all my talking here before getting to the main points. I mean – forgive me for not jumping straight to the real substance of this episode, and for going on a bit here at the start.
I hope you understand my reasons for saying all this stuff at the beginning. I feel it’s a little tricky to just jump from my normal episodes (which are about things like toilets, music, or language learning) to topics as serious, specific and current as these.
A certain amount of let’s say “tonal reframing” is necessary here, in order to make the transition from my normal content to these serious topics a bit more palatable, I suppose. So please forgive what you might consider to be padding, rambling or waffling here, in the form of yet another long introduction.
Originally this episode was only supposed to be about the situation in Iran. I started planning to talk about Iran ages ago – in December actually, during the Christmas holidays and I was finally about to record and publish it very soon, but then the terrible earthquake in Turkey/Syria happened just a few days ago (I am recording this on 9 February 2023 and the earthquake struck on Monday 6 February) and I feel like I also had to talk about that, but I didn’t want to put off talking about Iran any longer so I just decided to talk about both situations in this one single episode. As I said, I hope you listen to the entire thing.
I feel that it wouldn’t be right to make an episode like this, talking about a humanitarian crisis and just skip over the earthquake without mentioning it.
I have quite a big backlog of episodes in a queue, including ones which I recorded weeks ago and I really want to get them published, but I’m putting them on hold at this moment in order to publish this episode.
One of my aims here is to use this opportunity to ask you to consider giving to charities which can provide aid to the people affected by the earthquakes, first of all. I’ll mention some charities who we can donate to in a few moments.
OK. So, first some details about the earthquake, and then a couple of articles about the situation in Iran, with vocabulary explanations.
This will probably end up being really long. If you’re watching on YouTube you will see some chapter markers to help you navigate the episode. If you’re listening to the audio podcast, those chapter timecodes will be included in the show notes and on my website.
First let’s talk about the earthquake which happened in Turkey and Syria just a few days ago.
The very basic facts are that several devastating earthquakes have killed thousands of people in Turkey and Syria. Hundreds of buildings have been destroyed. Survivors are facing freezing conditions and need urgent aid.
The epicentre of the earthquake was in an area more or less on the border between Turkey and Syria and so that’s the worst affected place, but also this earthquake has affected other neighbouring areas and countries too.
If you’re interested in helping out those people in need by supporting charities, a good place to go for more information is the Disasters Emergency Committe https://www.dec.org.uk/
Sometimes it’s difficult to know who to trust when it comes to giving to a charity but the established ones with experience of providing aid on the ground are usually the better ones.
This organisation, The Disasters Emergency Committe is an association of 15 genuine, registered and experienced charities that can help people suffering in situations like the aftermath of this earthquake. You can find them at https://www.dec.org.uk/ and it is possible to donate to them there.
The D.E.C. are also involved in raising money and providing resources and help for people affected by crises in various places. On their website they list the Turkey/Syria earthquake, but also the terrible floods in Pakistan which have left millions of people in urgent need of help to survive, and the humanitarian crisis which has happened due to the conflict in Ukraine – the focus there is on helping millions of people who are left to survive in freezing temperatures without heating or electricity.
There will be other crises in other places too (notably there is the ongoing humanitarian crisis in Yemen), and UNICEF have an appeal to help refugees affected by that on their website as well. Link here.
Back to the emergency in Turkey and Syria, here is what the Disasters Emergency Committe website says about that, and this is a chance to look at the situation in a little bit more detail.
https://www.dec.org.uk/appeal/turkey-syria-earthquake-appeal
Also this BBC article https://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-64540696
Again, consider donating to https://www.dec.org.uk/ if you would like to offer your support.
I don’t know if you are aware but there there is a humanitarian crisis happening in Iran. According to Amnesty International, “Hundreds of protesters are being killed, tortured, and ill-treated for peacefully protesting for women’s rights.”
For months and months, people have been asking me to use my podcast as a platform to talk about this situation.
I did mention it a couple of times on the podcast last year, at the end of a couple of episodes in the audio versions when I often will ramble a bit at the end of episodes and just give my thoughts on what I’ve been doing, and perhaps respond to some comments from listeners.
That’s what I often do at the end of my audio episodes, but not everyone listens to the end of my audio episodes and so I suppose not a lot of people heard those comments (they were mainly just words of support for people in Iran and other places where things are tough).
Now I’m going to talk about it in more detail, read from some articles and explain some related vocabulary.
My aim for this is just to talk about what’s going on in order to give support to people who are struggling and also just to raise awareness of the situation.
I find that whenever I talk about something serious like this, especially when it involves another country (not my own) it seems to invite criticism from people.
Obviously this is a very serious story. I should say that I have not been to Iran and I have not seen things first-hand, but my impression is, from what I have read and from emails which I have received from listeners in Iran (and quite a few people have got in touch with me in various ways), my understanding is that this situation is horrendous and people are suffering.
In this part of this episode, in a moment, I’m just going to read a couple of online articles about the situation. These are things reported by people who, as far as I know, have done their best to find out what’s actually happening, and I’ll use those articles as texts for learning English.
I’ll read them to you and then highlight some vocabulary for you.
Before we do that, let me give just a few more of my personal comments about doing this episode. This will just be a couple of minutes. Then we’ll read the articles and look at vocabulary.
These protests and clashes have been going on for months and months and of course there is a lot of history here. I am a bit late to the topic. I’m recording this in February 2023.
I did try, several times, to record an episode about this last year but I stopped myself. I just ended up feeling a bit crushed by the seriousness of the situation. Sorry. I’m no expert and I wouldn’t want to get anything wrong.
Some people might not understand how I feel. Imagine standing up in front of a big crowd full of thousands and thousands of people from all around the world and talking about this to them, publicly. How would you feel? You might feel a bit nervous about it. Me too.
However, my personal doubts and reservations about doing this are relatively small concerns really, especially compared to the seriousness of this situation and what other people are experiencing just because they want to live their lives with a bit of freedom.
If you disagree with what I’m saying or doing in this episode for whatever reason, please do write a comment under this episode in polite language, in a diplomatic way and back it up with some evidence of some kind, or at least develop your argument coherently and clearly rather than just expressing an opinion very quickly.
Honestly, I don’t know who will disagree with what I am doing. In my experience when I talk about serious things in other countries there are always some people who take offense to it for one reason or another. I want to say that I am not criticising another country – rather, I am showing support. I am not making any statements about religion and I am not making a statement about what needs to be done here, on an international diplomatic level, by other countries or anything.
This is a very sensitive situation, both within the country and in terms of international relations.
But anyway, if you disagree with this for whatever reason and you suddenly feel compelled to write something in response, please take a moment to stop and consider carefully what you are writing before you do it.
It’s easy to be triggered and write something quickly, but I would like people to give considered, reasonable and respectful responses only please.
If you feel I have missed something, put it in the comment section. If you feel I’m not getting the full picture, put it in the comment section. Also, if you agree with the way I’m describing things and you want to add other comments, feel free.
Let me now try to put my personal doubts to one side and focus instead on just showing support for LEPsters (and non-LEPsters of course) in Iran who are suffering, and to give a bit of podcast-time to what is happening.
I have found several articles about what’s happening. The first is from the BBC (and I do want to show that this situation is being reported by the BBC – maybe not on their prime time evening news TV show, but they are reporting it on their website), another article is from Al-Jazeera and there are some threads I found on Reddit too, with some video footage probably recorded on mobile phones, which I will not be showing by the way.
I’ll read each article, maybe give some comments, and then I’ll summarise a selection of vocabulary from each one.
I know the BBC gets criticised by everyone on all sides, often for different reasons, but let’s just read this and see what it says.
Read the article
https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-63240911
Pronunciation
One woman
Some women /wimin/
Live = real bullets (not blanks, not rubber bullets)
As you may know, Reddit is a website where website users can have discussions about almost anything. This is user-generated content and there is some citizen journalism here – including direct video evidence from people who, it seems, were actually there (as far as I can tell).
I’m going to read a response from a user called zedlx to a question in the subreddit r/OutOfTheLoop asking what is happening in Iran.
There are links in the text for some of these things. Clicking the links takes us to other bits of media, including some shocking video footage of women being beaten by “police” (although a lot of them seem to be in plain clothes so we don’t really know who these people are), protesters fighting with police and even footage of police shooting live rounds (that’s real bullets) into crowds of protesters. I won’t be showing those videos because they’re far too sensitive, but a quick look at reddit, will show them. Please only do that at your own discretion and your own risk.
That comment on reddit by zedlx in response to the question “What is happening in Iran?”
A woman died in police custody after she was arrested for not wearing a hijab (head scarf) properly. Many Iranians went on protest by taking off their hijabs and burning them and cutting their hair
[Luke: Taking huge risks because they could be arrested and possibly beaten or worse].
The government responded by sending out the riot police to break up protests.
Their heavy-handed tactics, indiscriminately beating protesters, shooting into crowds, and so on, caused violence to escalate.
Now the government is enacting a communications blackout to prevent videos of the protests from being broadcast. The people have a limited workaround using VPNs and Tor which is how they spread the news and videos of the protests.
Note to myself: Just read this out and give some comments on some bits of vocabulary while you read. There isn’t time for a full vocabulary list.
This is a story about a high-profile Iranian actress who has been arrested for supporting part of the protest.
(The actress Taraneh Alidoosti starred in a film which won an Academy Award a few years ago)
Final statements
If you want to help – these organisations are campaigning in various ways
(read some of the statements from the websites)
Vital Voices – 4 things people can do to show support
Other charities and organisations are available too, of course.
OK, that’s it.
Thank you for your time listeners.
Good luck to everyone out there.
Consider donating to the Disasters Emergency Committe to help people suffering from the effects of the recent earthquake https://www.dec.org.uk/appeal/turkey-syria-earthquake-appeal
Take care, I hope this episode has been useful in some way.
I will speak to you next time.
But for now, goodbye.
A conversation with my brother about a specific musical genre, “ambient”. We discuss Brian Eno’s inspiration and approach to his first ambient albums, talk about the genre’s origins in French 19th century classical music, jazz and the avant-garde and describe ambient trance music from the 80s and 90s including artists like Aphex Twin, The KLF, The Orb and The Irresistible Force. Enter the ambient zone on LEP.
Brian Eno’s first ambient album “Music for Airports” ⬇️
“Cowboys in space” ⬇️
What I listened to while walking through Paris the other day ⬇️
The French classics which were perhaps the first ambient music ⬇️
Take a road trip across your own mind with The KLF ⬇️
The album which I listened to on repeat while recovering in hospital in Japan ⬇️ A trip into space, and beyond
Aphex Twin, the mysterious master of ambient music ⬇️
The German duo ⬇️
Do yourself a favour and listen to Mixmaster Morris ⬇️
An absolute classic, by Mixmaster Morris ⬇️
Everything is music ⬇️ “Some people have often put their fingers in their ears. But I leave my ears open.”
The Legend of Zelda – Ambient Mode ⬇️
Andrew Weatherall’s Strange Story about Ambient Music ⬇️
An unedited conversation with Amber & Paul about toilet habits, Titanic (1997), weird videos on TikTok & YouTube and plenty more. Advanced level listening practice with the POD-PALs. Video version available.
The audio version ☝️ has about 15 minutes of extra rambling by Luke at the end, not included in the video version 👇
Hello, listeners, I hope you’re doing well today. Welcome back to my podcast. This is where you can do plenty of listening in order to improve your English. Because listening is a vital part of the process. You have to listen, listen, listen and generally get used to hearing natural English as it is spoken and my podcast can help you to do that.
In this episode Amber & Paul are back on the podcast. In case you don’t know, Amber Minogue and Paul Taylor are my friends who have been regular guests on this show for many years. They are both stand-up comedians from the UK, living in Paris, like me.
A couple of weeks ago, before I had a haircut, the three of us got together here in my room and had a conversation for this podcast. We didn’t plan the topic in advance. So you’re going to hear a lot of spontaneous natural speaking. We’re not slowing down or trying to use the easy words. This is just how we speak normally when we’re together. As you will notice, I try to explain things or clarify things as we go, in order to help you a bit, but still, it might be difficult, depending on your English level.
If you like you can think of this as a kind of listening test. Can you follow what we’re saying and keep up with all the changes in the conversation?
You’ll see that the episode title is Toilets, Titanic and TikTok which gives you a general idea of what we talk about.
We didn’t have a lot of time, so I just pressed record, and then quite quickly we found ourselves talking about toilets first of all.
So there’s a good 45 minutes of us talking about toilets.
By the way, in British English the word toilet means both the room and the thing in the room that you sit on.
In American English the toilet is just the thing you sit on, and the room in American English would probably be called the restroom or the bathroom, although when we go there we’re not resting or having a bath, but anyway… This is a conversation about toilets.
We talk about what people do in the toilet, on the toilet, near the toilet and even above the toilet in some cases.
So, be ready for some rather specific and possibly disgusting details about this topic.
I don’t know how you feel about this subject. Personally I find it quite fascinating to learn about this very private thing that we don’t always talk about, except maybe when we’re together with close friends like this.
For example, any women listening – do you know what happens in men’s public toilets? And men, do you know what goes on in women’s public toilets? I think we know what basically happens, but what about certain, other, unknown things?
For example, why is there usually a much bigger queue at the women’s loo (“loo” is UK English for “toilet”).
Do men always stand up when they pee or do they sometimes do it sitting down? And which one is actually easier or better?
How do other people deal with public toilets, which can be dirty or messy? And in fact, why are they so messy, especially in the toilet cubicles? What are people doing in there?
And have you ever argued, with someone you live with, about leaving the toilet seat up?
Women often get frustrated with men who leave the toilet seat up.
Toilet seat up? toilet seat down? What’s going on here? Why is that annoying? And who is right?
That’s just a sample of the kinds of things we’re talking about, OK?
So, brace yourself – toilet talk is coming, with some specific references to hygiene and cleanliness too.
Then, somehow we go from the toilet, to the film Titanic, and that will be generally less disgusting and problematic I think, although arguably what happened on the Titanic is much much worse than what normally happens in the toilet, but I don’t know your habits, I don’t know your life.
Then things get a bit more graphic again at the end of the conversation as we talk about some weird, disgusting and yet strangely satisfying videos we like to watch on TikTok and YouTube.
So here is an unedited talk full of tangents about tea, toilets, Titanic, TikTok trends and more, and here we go…
OK audio people, how was that for you?
Congratulations for making it this far. You just entered over 1 hour of English into your head. Think of the people who didn’t do that. They now have 1 hour less of English exposure.
As I said at the start, this conversation was fast (as usual) and there were probably things you missed.
I started the recording before we were ready to begin, that’s because I just needed to get started because we didn’t have a lot of time (Amber had to leave at about 3.30 as usual). So I just hit record.
Paul asked about which audience is bigger – the video viewers or the audio listeners. I said the audio listeners outnumbered the video viewers and so Paul said he wouldn’t do too many visual things, like visual jokes.
Then he pretended to take his trousers off (I guess this was in order to make a visual joke). In fact, he unzipped his jeans, but didn’t actually unbuckle his belt.
This led to Paul commenting that men only unbuckle their belt or fully undo their trousers twice each day, and then we were off and the topic turned to the topic of men undoing their trousers in the toilet, and we asked Amber about what it’s like for women to use the toilet when they are wearing a one-piece outfit, like a jump suit. Isn’t that complicated?
And that’s how it all started, you see. I guess if you’re still listening to this, you got that. I wonder how many people just gave up after the first 5 or 10 minutes.
Anyway, that’s enough waffle at the end.
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