A spontaneous monologue about being taken by surprise by public holidays in May (in France), a podcast recommendation, and seeing a hard-rocking and hilarious band perform live in a big arena last week. Includes a song at the end as a tribute.
A spontaneous monologue about being taken by surprise by public holidays in May (in France), a podcast recommendation, and seeing a hard-rocking and hilarious band perform live in a big arena last week. Includes a song at the end as a tribute.
Here’s a list of jokes about different countries which I found on the website Bored Panda. I’ll tell you the jokes and then explain them all (dissecting the frog), including any homophones, double meanings or specific cultural references. Can you “get” the jokes? Do you find any of them funny, or are they all just terrible dad jokes? And, what vocabulary can you learn in the process? Includes a vocabulary review at the end of the episode.
In this episode we’re going to read some jokes about different countries in the world, and I’m going to use them to help you learn English.
They’re not really jokes about countries. They’re mainly just jokes based on the country names. So I won’t be making fun of specific countries or anything.
I’ve found a list of 100 jokes.
Jokes like these…
👍
#12
Which country’s capital city is growing the fastest?
Ireland.
Because every day it’s Dublin.
doubling??
This is all just a bit of fun, but also it’s a chance to learn some vocabulary.
Before we continue, I need to make several jokes about my country: The UK
A map of the UK
It’s just there, under that huge rain storm.
More specifically, England
Football
What do you call an English man in the World Cup final?
The referee.
British Food
Well, this is how our biscuits are sold in France
C’est Anglais, mais c’est bon !
Translation:
It’s English, but it’s good.
*Actually they’re Scottish
*Actually the company is owned by a Turkish confectionery conglomerate
And I’m sure you could write plenty of jokes about our Royal Family…
But you don’t really need to
Subtext: They’re already quite funny aren’t they?
I don’t mean to be rude about our king, but apparently he has a sense of humour, so I’m sure he doesn’t mind.
cheers
Can you understand these jokes?
If you understand a joke you can say
“I get it”
If you don’t understand why it’s supposed to be funny, you’d say
“I don’t get it”
If you understand it, but you think it isn’t funny, you can just groan.
🤦
There will be VOCABULARY
I will explain every joke that you hear in this episode, including
I have only had
a very quick look
at this list of jokes.
I found this joke list on the website BoredPanda.com. There are 100 jokes in the list, but I’ve only seen about the first 15 jokes.
I haven’t seen the rest.
So I am going to be reading most of these for the first time, so let’s discover these jokes together.
Disclaimer:
This might not be funny
at all 😐
It’s necessary to say this again…
I will dissect these jokes. You might learn some English,
but the jokes will probably die in the process.
Sorry jokes, and sorry frogs.
🐸
But don’t worry. No actual frogs will be harmed during the making of this episode.
And when I say “frogs” I’m not talking about French people 🇫🇷
“Dissecting the frog” or explaining jokes is something I’ve been doing on this podcast for years.
by a listener called Evgenia
a T-shirt design by a listener called Adel (available in my merch store
– the t-shirt I mean)
Let’s keep reading jokes until nobody can take it any more.
I’ll tell about 5 jokes, then I’ll explain them, and then I’ll continue with more jokes…
Amber & Paul return to the podcast for another tangential conversation about various things, including why Paul is angry 😤, how Amber gets crushed in her own bed 🛌, how our British children don’t need to wear coats 🧥, the special gifts Luke has prepared for Amber & Paul 🎁, the highs and lows of Paul’s global comedy tour 🎭, how he’s been telling the Russian joke on stage 😐, Amber’s recent trip to London 🇬🇧, The Beatles’ “Now & Then” 🎶, the next step in Paul’s career ⏩, Amber’s kids saying more funny things 👧👦💬 and more…
In the next episode we’re playing The Lying Game. If you want to listen to previous lying game episodes, check out this list 👇
308. The Lying Game (Part 1) with Amber & Paul | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
309. The Lying Game (Part 2) with Amber & Paul | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
317. The Lying Game 2: The Rematch (Part 1) with Amber & Paul | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
318. The Lying Game 2: The Rematch (Part 2) with Amber & Paul | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
436. The Return of The Lying Game (with Amber & Paul) [Video] | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
642. The Lying Game Returns (with Amber & Paul) | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
663. The Lockdown Lying Game with Amber & Paul | Luke’s ENGLISH Podcast
Join me as I talk without a script about lovely cold weather ❄️ being too lazy to wash my cups 🍵 feeling exhausted because my son won’t sleep 👶😮💨 New Year’s Eve celebrations 🛋 performing stand up comedy to 4200 people 🎤 a recommended YouTube channel about adventurous missions in the UK countryside 🥾 and recent horror films I’ve seen 🙀.
This is part 2 of this double episode. Please listen to part 1 first! Sarah and Fred are trivia quiz nerds with a new trivia podcast. In this episode they joined me for some trivia quizzing and conversation. In this second part you can listen to my quiz for Sarah and Fred, and then Fred’s quiz for me. Can you answer the questions? Can you follow the whole conversation? Listen carefully!
Bed bugs in Paris & London, Mosquito hunting in the middle of the night, a home invasion by fleas and the terrors of cockroaches – listen to some anecdotes about encounters with insects with Zdenek who has recently relocated to Vietnam. Also watch out for various insect idioms which appear during the conversation.
Here are the idioms which popped up during this conversation.
1. **To have a Bee in Your Bonnet** This idiom means that someone has an idea or a thought that’s constantly on their mind, often an obsession.
2. **To have Ants in Your Pants** If someone has “ants in their pants,” it means they are restless or fidgety, unable to sit still.
3. **To be as Busy as a Bee** This idiom describes someone who is extremely busy and productive, like a hardworking bee in a hive.
4. **To have Butterflies in Your Stomach** When you’re nervous or anxious, you might say you have “butterflies in your stomach.”
5. **To be The Bee’s Knees** This expression is used to describe something excellent or outstanding.
6. **To Make a Beeline for** If you “make a beeline for” something or someone, you head directly towards it, just like a bee flying straight to a flower.
7. **Like a Moth to a Flame** If someone is drawn to something or someone despite the potential dangers, they are said to be like a moth to a flame.
8. **To bug someone** To annoy someone
Also, to bug a place means to hide recording equipment in a place in order to spy on the people living there. Zdenek believes his apartment is not bugged, thankfully.
“The Glib Brothers” reunite on the podcast to discuss more music, films, books, scary AI and UFO sightings. James is my older brother and he’s probably been on this podcast more than any other guest. Listen for another deep and humorous conversation with lots of cultural reference points.
[DOWNLOAD]

Hang out with me for an unscripted and unedited ramble about things like engaging moments while English teaching, how it feels to be about to become a father again, a funny new recording of my daughter speaking English, some recent films I’ve seen, and a recording of me doing stand-up comedy in front of an audience recently.